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Truth and Lies about Filipinas dating Foreigners!

By Kach Umandap May 30th, 2022 Posted in Inspiration and Love Stories, Travel Blog 674 Comments

Filipinas dating foreigners – The Real Life Experiences and Criticisms of a Filipina dating a Westerner


This is also for all the Filipinas dating Foreigners instead of our Filipino men and being judged for it!

Here are the most common misconceptions that I want to clear up – We would love to hear other Filipinas’ stories so please feel free to share your experiences below!

“When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself” ― Earl Nightingale

When I quit my job in the Middle East to start my backpacking journey, aside from the other reasons and lies I was telling myself and people around me about why I wanted to leave my corporate life, I left because I just wanted to have more time to understand myself, to love me and just to be with myself!

Unexpectedly, during a few days exploring Luang Prabang, Laos, I met Jonathan! If you’re traveling on your own, you’ll meet a lot of travelers – mostly European, and being a backpacker you shouldn’t expect another backpacker to take you to an expensive restaurant –  oh and he’s British btw. After a few months of just keeping in touch on Facebook while I continued my solo backpacking, Jon and I decided to be officially together, and we’re now together for almost two years! I’m not lucky cuz I’m with a white man – we are BOTH lucky to have each other cuz we deserve the best!

Related Article: Are you planning to travel solo? Check out our DIY Travel Guides here and for cheap hostels around the world, check the list here.)

Note: This is based on my personal experience and life story. I’m not generalizing, and if you can relate then awesome, if not, I didn’t intend to offend any of you.

1. I’m dating a Foreigner because I need a Visa or a British passport.

Yes, there are perhaps some Filipinas dating foreigners who have this reason but not in most cases! I was already traveling on my own long before I met Jonathan (well, I met Jonathan while traveling!). Jonathan and I are both long-term travelers and us living and settling down in the UK couldn’t be further from our minds. We both want to buy land to build our very own yoga resort in the Philippines. Jon keeps asking me about how he can get a permanent resident’s visa in the Philippines. So maybe it’s foreign men who need the visa, not the Filipinas!

We Filipinas can also travel to any country in the world with our  Philippines passport so why would we need them if we can already get things on our own!? Ok, so they have more ‘free countries’ than us, but it balances out because when they pay, they pay big! Also, if you travel in mostly Asian countries, having a Filipino passport has way more advantages than his, he has to pay more than me! UPDATE: We’re engaged and getting married next year! I will be getting a Long-term visa to visit the UK but I’m not interested in getting a British passport or citizenship as others are assuming because we don’t have any plans to live in the UK, as long as my future children will have dual citizenship then that’s great for us!

Even though some Filipinas might need their foreign partner’s visa or passport, it’s their life choice. Why do you care?

2. I’m dating a foreigner because I need his money.

After completing my economics degree (in UPLB), I worked in the Middle East for four years before starting this journey. I funded my South East Asia backpacking trip with my savings then when Jon and I started living together, we always shared our expenses, from food, rent, and everything (that’s the British way, in Tagalog “Kanya kanyang bayad!”).

Yep, unfortunately…wait for it…white people don’t shit money! Trust me, I’ve checked! When I met Jon, he had empty pockets and a $300 broken-down motorbike. If I was looking for a sugar daddy, I must have been blinded by that magic white skin again!

When we decided to pursue our around-the-world backpacking journey together, we both worked hard to build our initial funds! I even had five freelance jobs at the same time in Hanoi, Vietnam as we wanted to save more than ever! I taught English, and yoga classes to children and even handled the Marketing Department of a western-owned company while in Vietnam, oh did I mention that I won a Vietnamese reality TV show?

He works, I work. He saves, I save. Equal partnership!

3. I’m only successful because of my foreign partner.

No matter what success we experience, people might still think it’s because the Magic white man got us here. I want to be modest here, but straight to the point. Do you think we Filipinas can’t be successful without the help of any man or even a foreigner? Do you realize that you’re yourself?! Well, if you think so, shame on you!

This website was started by me, Jon wasn’t really into it, but with a little persuasion, he joined in and started writing too. Now people like his writing and that’s great! We both became yoga teachers and Ayurveda massage therapists because of my crazy idea of supporting our long-term travels. All of my teaching, volunteering, and freelancing jobs have been through my research, resourcefulness, and commitment. So don’t tell me that we Filipinas dating foreigners just stay at home, waiting for our partners to feed us!

Even if someone does decide to remain at home to look after the family and home, that’s a personal choice that also involves a lot of hard work.

4. If he marries me, he will marry and support my whole family.

Well, hello! Again, it may happen in some cases, but before marrying their Filipina wife, the foreigner must already have met the family, right? So it was their choice if you still want to marry despite the condition! Unless they slipped it in the wedding vows without him noticing, ‘…to have and to hold, to pay Lola’s medical bills…wait, WHAT THE F#%!$?!’ Unlikely…

We don’t all fit the stereotype, sorry. My parents are both Professional; my younger sister is also a Dentist while my younger brother is about to finish his University degree. We are not rich, but my family lives comfortably, and we were brought up to be independent. This means, that if you want to do something, you work for it, and you shouldn’t depend on anyone else to just give it to you!

5.  The foreigner is dating me because he needs a slave.

Aha, so being warm and hospitable and loving towards your partner means that you’re a slave? Oh, that’s great! I wonder if these people ever stop to consider that these feelings and actions are returned by the man. British and most other westerners are raised to be very independent. Most of them leave home at the age of 18 and up until then, they do household chores; guys and girls! We share the cleaning in our house, but funnily Jon is better and faster at it than I am! Young western kids often have jobs when they are growing up, not because the family is poor, but to earn some of their own money and to get some real-life experience and responsibility before leaving school. Jon even leaves the Do Not Disturb sign on the hotel room door because ‘it feels weird having someone come and clean up after me!’

6. If you’re white, then you’re rich!

Huh! Not all white people are rich; this is a hangover of the American occupation. We’ve had complete independence since 1946 people, get a grip! Western countries have a range of incomes and living standards just like we do. If everyone was rich, who would clean the streets, or do menial tasks that no one else wants to do? Ahh western-style economics, making sure we always have someone poor enough to sweep the streets!

The only real difference is the higher value of their currency in the world, which just makes their own countries very expensive to live in and other countries cheaper to visit! But this only works if they earn money in one of the expensive countries.  It’s the same logic anywhere. And yes, poverty does exist in western countries, it just doesn’t have the same impact in a news headline as a photo of a small brown child with flies on her face!

7. Only desperate Filipinas are dating Foreigners!

I’ve dated Filipinos before and was even in a long-term relationship with one!  It’s pretty annoying when people say that “if you can’t find a good Filipino then just look for a foreign man.”  This is also stupid; there are plenty of amazing, loving, and faithful Filipino men all over the world. There are good and bad in every country; nationality has very little to do with it!

Again, maybe some Filipinas marry out of desperation, but this could happen in any country, not just in the Philippines.

On the other hand, if you told me that I was only with a  foreigner for his genes, then I might be inclined to agree. I would love our children to have Jon’s blonde hair and blue eyes, with slightly tanned Filipino skin…That might look a bit weird, to be honest, but we’ll let you know when we have some proof! We all know that most of the stars in the Philippines are half and half, perhaps we can make the next Anne Curtis, Sam Milby, and Alden Richards.

Travel & Visa Coaching

Well, I don’t know your reasons why you’re dating your foreign man, I’m dating this foreigner because I love him! Cheers to all Independent Women out there! 

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674 thoughts on “Truth and Lies about Filipinas dating Foreigners!

  1. I have a forgein wife. I have help her tremendously with money. Her family very poor. I feel good to do it. I care about people. More important then money. My choice. I got involved because they have a hard time.Everyone is of different mind.

    1. I am divorced with Cebuana. We have 13 y.o. child. I been going there for 13 years. This summer I was single in Cebu. Met a girl. Works hard, great mom of 2 boys. I am now back in USA. We chat regularly. She never asks me for money. I too enjoy sending her some pesos to pay for medicines and cakes at Birthdays etc. She is discrete but I know she dates etc regularly. I expect nothing from her but to do good things with the money I send. But that too is up to her to decide. Give without expectations is the way to have no regrets. I sure can not judge her. What a blessing my son is with me here in USA. We have food, clothing and shelter with health care. They do what they have to do. They have NO CHOICE. I can not change the world, but I can help some. I look forward to hopefully seeing her on my next trip to Cebu. Find a person who is working hard and doing their best each day, in PI, and still can’t make enough. Help that person and enjoy the pics they send and the penpal communication. Easy to tell the true from the falsified. Don’t waste your resources on those that take advantage. Many need and appreciate your help.

    2. That sounds like my situation I care more for my wife an my family than I do money cuz who would spend $53,000 since December 29th 2019 on his fiancee now wife an immigration an family if he didn’t love an care for the whole situation!! My family told me I’m the most unselfish person when it comes to money to a fault!! Money is paper love is everything an I love my Filipina wife but I won’t get into the red flag part of it now the she is here I saved her from a life as a bar girl!! Feel free to email 📧 me if u have any questions cuz im basically a lawyer at this point an I have five inches of paper work tall to prove I did everything. My wife an I had to wait an video chat during the Corona virus hoax even though our I-129F had been approved we were lucky we submitted our I-129F 12 days prior to the Corona virus hoax lock down an spent at least a thousand hours video chatting even going out on dates together sharing our lives together thank goodness it wasn’t the 90s with calling cards an no daily visual communication ❤️ have a blessed day with Jesus 😇

  2. When it comes to importance the foreign boyfriend rates very low on the list of priorities.
    It usually goes something like this:
    Family (as it should be), friends, friends, friends (did I say friends?), government officials that they have to pay off, maid, homeless person on the street, stray dogs, boyfriend….I’m sure I missed someone.

  3. I love reading this article, I’m a single mom of two and never in my mind thought of dating foreigners. When I came to the US I just wanted to find a job that can support me and my kids. One day my friend introduced me this Guy who accepted me as a single mom and accepted all my flaws and brings out the best in me. And the rest is history, we are still together until now.

  4. Hello yes I met a Filipino beautiful woman and we are engaged to be married we have been together for over a year now we didn’t meet for money she didn’t meet me for money she’s working abroad she’s very responsible and that showed me great love and she’s all about being honest and upfront we do have cultural differences and we do argue a lot she is a very jealous person I don’t know if it’s insecurities or if it’s just jealousy but that’s our big fall down is the difference in our cultures and what our beliefs are and what we was raised with and it’s comes down to compromise without compromisation compromise you have nothing and you got to have trust and you got to have honesty but it’s been absolutely awesome and just wanted to put it out there that this rumor of that these Filipino females have on their back is just untrue granted there is plenty of bad ones out there but it’s not hard to figure that out before you get too deep into it thank you so much love your feedback I’m doing talk to text by the way so pardon the spelling or the wording

  5. I met a Filipina woman
    and she has been busy but don’t message me sometimes also I met her online and well let say that we like each other I have been talking to her for 9 weeks and she from Manila, but I don’t know if she will tell me where she live, or she work at and yes I do sent stuff to support her, but I understand that she work very hard and, she sleeps and go to work and come late home and I love her so much, and I know she loves me and I can’t tell what she’s doing after work, or she don’t share location with me, I don’t know if she trusts me with her location, but I trust her because I love her and I would do anything to make her happy and safe and I do share my location with her but need to make sure she’s not cheating on me and should I ask her that.

    1. Just to be shure that she dont using you or us coz im also involved in Filipina online relationship with money involved write me what Nickname or name shes using coz that is for our good ok??!

  6. well thanks
    I just meet a great Filipina Woman
    I don’t know very much about her
    only I know she have a great personality and she funny
    consequently I don’t have any indications to make me believe
    she fit on the people bad stereotype against the Filipina Women
    I find your page enjoyable to read
    I think label an entire culture
    just because some bad apples were dishonest is just silly
    and is also very racist

  7. Greetings, I’m dating a filipina from the province in leyte, I very much enjoyed your insight into the reasons why Filipinas date foriegn men ,and you are spot on about foriegn men, and I’m slowly coming around to the facts that the woman I love, is more into what I an do for her family and not really into me, I will be 4 years come July we’ve been together and I’ve even been for a visit and to meet in person, the culture and the country is truly amazing, and again thank you for prospective from someone in a actual relationship with a foreigner, I hope you and Jon have a lifetime of joy together with many beautiful and healthy children. Thank you again………. joe

  8. Hi im Don i married a woman from the phillipines .Lots of people inquired as to why we married .Most assumed why we married. ,gave horrible advise and didnt know the real reason why we chose to do so. wasn’t about supporting her family or how beautiful she was or nothing like that .We fell in love and she didnt fall as fast as i did for the purpose of love .I found my wife to be highly intelligent loving and caring serious and much more .She demonstrated a great since of responsibility with money and did well with what little i wad able to help her with financially and was accountable with what she received and shared that how and when she felt the need .She was and has been a blessing to me from day one .She didnt marry me for looks trust me .Were best friends we feel more so than anything and i have to accept her for who she is .We both wanted to be life time partners and in gods will not of our own will .So what we have now is out destiny for good or bad rich or poor were in it for the long run ,thats are hopes and dreams its about us not about everyone else . I vow to support my wife as best i can and she the same .We didnt marry for money ,sex ,belongings we fell in love with each other thats the reason why .LET IT BE BETWEEN US AND ARE HIGHER POWER without him we would have never been ,thats always been are prayer AMEN

  9. Hey Frank,
    I can’t find the comment box so I’m using the reply function to leave a comment.

    Though I find your blog entry and adventures fantastic, I think that you haven’t stopped doing what you mentioned in the first paragraph: lying to yourself and others.
    You would’ve never let yourself be so smitten if you had found out that buddy was in fact from a South African shanty town (poor whites folks in SA are in bad shape). While your motives seem respectable, you can’t deny that your beau’s British passport would drastically change your life.

    That’s something else I’ve noticed in the Philippines. I’m a dual citizen (USA and France). I’m also black. When women here asked me if I’m from Africa, I usually pull out my phone and show them pictures of my passports. The legs always spread… Without a fail (we’re not talking about 18yo bar girls. Girls in their 30s with jobs). I understand that life in the Philippines can be challenging for Filipinos. ASEAN is made of a bunch of poor countries after all.

    What I really can’t take is the lack of morals, the incessant lying, the laziness, the deceitful behaviors, and the sheer lack of accountability that most filipinas I’ve dated displayed. We all know why the vast majority of low/ middle grade pinays are going for North American/ European guys. There’s no point of lying.
    As much as I think that the Philippines could’ve been a great place, your constant lying and concept of saving face (which differs drastically from the Chinese or the vietnamese) will be your a main aspect of your cultural downfall as a nation.

    I had planned on dating one girl seriously here. Got an apartment with all the amenities one could ask for. All she had to do was to participate in the daily tasks. She was as productive as a sloth on ketamine. Though I liked her company, I had to kick her lazy ass out. I wasn’t looking for a slave, but someone that understands that it’s a two-way street. She was sweet for the first year. Her true self came out when she thought she had made it. Thank god I didn’t offer to take her home. I couldn’t even take her home even if I wanted to. Bringing a Pinay from the Philippines to the US in your 30s is never a good look. Another thing is, what would her lazy ass do in the US? Kids with masters end up working at jack in the box these days. Her Filipino degree has as much value as used TP.

    Your story with your beau doesn’t reflect the sad reality. Filipinos are nice people when on a two-week holiday. Stay longer, get to know them, and you start developing feelings that you never thought you were capable of having.

    All in all, I hope things work out with your dude, though I highly doubt it will (unless he’s got deep pockets). Living a good life on a small budget is easy in SEA. Spent one weekend in London back in 2019, and it was down $3000. The developed world is not cheap. It is a dog eat dog world that will have you wonder why you wanted to be there in the first place. Hope you get that passport!

    PS: don’t lie to yourself and others as much. I can read between the lines. You’re still doing it

    1. If you go looking in a whorehouse, you’re going to find whores. That what these dating sites are, whorehouses. What ever happened to meeting a girl the old fashioned way?

  10. Love the story until the genetic part. Wanting your kids to have fair skin and be like every actor in the Philippines is somewhat colonial. The idea of “White being right,” is also racial, disregarding the facts that most filipinos are darker skin. Why aren’t some of you in The Philippines encouraging darker skin filipinos to be on TV but have to be white? Self-hate is disgusting. Plus, every genetic-made-up people are beautiful. Wanting your kids to look white just gives it away that most of you are brainwashed to this idea that “WHITE IS RIGHT.” Great piece though. You just lost me on the “wanting your kids to look white part.” Suppose if they were half-Black?

  11. Hello 👋🏽
    Wow. What a refreshing, honest and well observed piece of writing about a subject that is steeped in prejudice and bigotry. Thank you. It’s so interesting to read your insightful comments. I only know a little about Philippines people and culture but I’ve come to live and admire both. Few countries in the world are as undervalued and underestimated.
    I can only speak from the perspective of one white, English guy. And (to generalise somewhat) many of the stereotypical and generalised comments you highlight serve from the unhealthy disregard in which Asian women are held by too many white, western men.
    In every Filipino I’ve met and worked with I’ve come to respect and admire the character and strength I’ve found. That’s what I seek in a partner. Probably a bit too late for me know at my age sadly. But I can dream.
    I wish you every success in your lives together. Thank you so much.

  12. last year I met an online dating site girl Monica Lopez from Bocolodo Philippines and we met. she pretended to be in love, later sent pictures to my relatives and friends and demanded payment. she had filmed me in bed in intimate conditions. she is a fraudster looking for a sponsor. I wrote an application to the police for several months without success. be careful with Filipinos

  13. I am a 61 yr old American male, I’m sorry but put yourself in her shoes at her young age. If you can,
    remember what it was like visiting your Grandpa’s house when you were young. This is what these Young ladies will feel like with us!!!! Picture yourself at the age of 30, Some Younger, full of juice, and ready to take on the world, Now tell me YOU LOVE your Grandmother’s best friend who is 70 years old. (That’s Us Now) But we KNOW she can offer us and our family help. which one are you In it for???? Come on guys this is nothing more than a long-term business deal for the both of us, If you think there is REAL love involved then were A FOOL!!!! Another thing if you bring one of the ladies to America YOU ARE A FOOL. That’s like tossing them into a GIANT BOWL OF GREEN CARDS, ALL your friends are going to be cutting you right out of the picture for such a pretty lady already in the States. Nothing wrong with hooking up but keeping your brain in the right location and not stuck crossways in your zipper, or getting stuck on STUPID if you think anyone can be INLOVE with a grandparent at these young ages. Put yourself in front of a mirror naked and think.

  14. We all know you want a sugar daddy in Jonny. Your own Filipinos agree and talk shit about you. Plus now Filipinos don’t get visas that easily since you stay in European/white countries illegally and now immigration are issuing them less cause of your reputation as sleazeballs and free load mongers. You can’t change people’s perception and the truth by this horribly dumbfounded bland Filipino tasting article.
    PS You have so many rotten apples and this will become your future.

  15. Ok this can be argued both ways.
    The way you meet and where you meet has more weight on the motive for wanting a westerner. If your in one of those cheesy fb dating dies your nite inclined to be duped by a wide variety of reasons and yes sone if your myths are very real because I’ve experienced them myself. I’m happy you find each other and there are real success stories, but sadly there are many more that are not. For instance Ldr is difficult. If you meet in person The is are much better.
    But there are those that are looking for reasons listed in your article. Mainly those that met on a fb dating page
    Thank you

  16. I’ve read comments here and decided to write my own, because my experience with Filipina females is drastically different. I found them to be sweetest creatures on earth. I think bad experiences stem from the fact that men who got burned found their gf on creepy mail order bride sites, it stands to reason that this sort of websites will be populated by females whose intentions aren’t the purest.

    The girls that I was talking to were never interested in my money or moving abroad, Filipinas are very family oriented. I’ve been invited to move and live with them. If You want to find love in Philippines and are prepared to move there, I suggest looking on facebook or using badoo app as it seems to be popular there, and setting your location to Manila, but don’t be a pervert because nice girls don’t like that at all, this might only work on desperate mail order bride types. As for their attraction to white men there is no doubt that it exists, it has to do with history, first Spanish and then Americans coming there.

  17. I married a blood sucking parasite gold digger Filipina from camiguin island who has been undermining our marriage from day one.I also brought her 6 year old daughter to come live with two year after we got married in Cairns/Australia.Now after 11 years of marriage she ask the police to charge me for domestic violence and when this failed in court she now accused me of misappropriate touching her now 16 year old daughter that I have raised and loved as my own daughter.I kicked them both out of the house last September and I am now applying for divorce.I have also been told last week from her friend that she planned everything to screw me and get all my assets for the last 7 years.I also found out she was having an affair with two other men when she worked.She also told her friends that the court will give her over 85% of the assets but I believe she just found out that she will only get less than 10% i as the court found out that she did not contribute a cent and all the assets have been acquired over 20 years before she came into my life.She will end up in a chicken pen instead of a beautiful 3 bedroom house with swimming pool and beautiful garden and also brand new car ever 3 years.
    I hope KARMA will get her soon and she choke to death on her own vomit.

  18. Typical Filipina answers in this vlog of course they will never admit what they are actually marrying u for! Woman have a thousand secrets and will never tell u all. Of course they wan to move abroad so they can benefit as part of their ulterior motive and just in case they get divorced they can find another American with their green card. They are very clever when it comes to these things it’s almost instinctive. Most Filipinas online are fake or using kanos and there’s only that 10% that is legit. Never give up though as there are those diamonds in the rough

  19. Hi i have an American boyfriend and he’s amazing. I am currently working hard and studying so that i can be confident living in the US. Hopefully I’ll be ready next year. He is working hard as well, he has a good job but he wants a better job lol. Point is, i am not planning to be dependent on him. And i understand why a lot of foreigners lost their trust with filipina women. I don’t even trust a good majority. My advice will be, if theres a red flag.. observe.make sure and don’t doubt it. It’s pretty easy to spot of people are after your money. I always advice my foreign friends neeeeeeeever use money to court someone. Don’t offer to pay bills or give them internet. If the person genuinely likes you, money shouldn’t be involved. That person will find a way. (And internet is not expensive here. If she has time going online looking for foreigners, then she has the data to talk to you almost 24/7) i agree with a lot thats written here. Best of luck! I was actually wondering how many filipinas are married and is still married to their foreigner husbands. Just curious, because of cultural differences etc. And the adjustments of living in the US. *Thinking emoji*

    1. My wife who is a Filipina-American and I am a White American. We both met each other when I was based at Clark AB Philippines. I married her because I fell in love with her. I know she married me for the same reason. We have been married for over 38 years and have two grown children. I do not mind my wife helping her family in the Philippines as our money earned is both of ours. I truly think of the Philippines as my second home as I find Filipino and Filipina’s family oriented and very kind people.

  20. From the beginning a young Filipino girl marrying an older American… She wanted a green card… I wanted her…. When I proud to hear from the Philippines… She told me she wouldn’t marry me unless I guarantee to send $500 per month to her family because she was the breadwinner… She ran off with a friend of my business a friend of mine… And told me he offered her family$1,000 a month to marry her… I was foolish and infatuated and once we were married it was a constant issue of her family need additional funds for one disaster or another… She thought I was an ATM machine.. through her network of friends she was more educated on immigration and how to manipulate Americans… She flipped off back and forth between being very sweet and very nasty… My only salvation was not appearing at the immigration hearing forcing her to agree to and immediate divorce so she could find somebody else.

  21. Hi! I’m Ellie (not my real name) and I’m a Pinay who lives in the Philippines.

    It is nice to have read your blog and you have found bliss with such a partner. But I’m mostly sad with the comments here, given the freshness of their comments and generally the traumatic experience they’ve had with Filipinas… I truly hope you find peace, not in love, but with yourself. And on behalf of the Filipino people and your broken trust in us, especially with our women, I am truly sorry.

  22. All I can say is, about my experience…having been with women, of every, race, creed, and colour. There are sincere ones, my estimate .0001% What’s in your wallet….oh…where is my wallet?

  23. I’ve met a lot of Philippines woman and they all deceived me.(or tried too)
    The thing they say after you start to fall for her is … I can’t marry anyone until I buy my family a home…
    The next girl told me she could not marry until she could pay for a business for her family….

    1. Most pinays online are deceivers and users and most educated pinays that go with average kanos they stick to their own kind. I see mostly province girl type natives going for all kinds of white kanos which is something I don’t go for. Also if u can’t have good communication with them than forget it won’t last

  24. I settled with a filipina in a same sex marriage. We are both women, she came to live with me in Europe. Throughout the last decade of our marriage I have recently learnt she has cheated multiple times. She is ruthless and hideously rude when she wants to be and she does not even respect her own religion. As soon as her visa and legal paperwork was done her personality changed drastically. I loved her so deeply that I was blind to see that she never really cared about human emotions or real love. For her life is only exciting when there is another person to talk sexy with or gain an ego with. I notice as well that most Filipino films glorify cheating as a norm. It may not be her fault that she was bought up in a country with low morals. So if you ask me… Yes people can be users and hurtful and in this case the culture she comes from does not value anything but money. I really liked The Philippines but all is tainted. To answer your questions…yes she sends her family small amounts of money and then belittles them for asking her. Low morals is all I can think of.

  25. Then why are so many Filipino girls in bars, waiting out Hotels and apartments in Bahrain and the UAE. 80% percentod woman in bars and nightclubs in the Middle East are Filipino woman and maybe the rest are Russian. Also men know they can easily have a one night stand with any Filipino girl just buying her a few drinks and some pot.

  26. howvi found this i have no idea haha but all incorrect just to defend pinoy pride with fake stereotypes

    7 should be “ Only desperate Filipinas are dating “OLD “Foreigners!. haha keep it truthful , as many asians have white boyfriends ( nothing new) but if a 25 year old pinay is with a old fat white me .. that’s because she’s desperate and cant get a good man in philippines or only wants $$$$ mostly single moms.

    also many pinays only want a passport as they want to leave philippines ( nothing new but not saying all.. and most white men who seek pinays are fat old men and the white men pinaya choose are normally the first white man who sats hi to them and 99 percent these couples have absolutely nothing in common besides he’s lonely, and she’s desperate for a white man ans mix baby half white kids. your bf or husband sure is an insecure sissy who has no game and is unwanted in uk .

    1. You really don’t know Filipino culture unlike here in the states Thier culture doesn’t mind if there’s a girl younger then there man they like maturity. So before you talk your shit do the process of learning Thier culture you racist piece of shit.

    2. Well Adam, you’re clearly a thoughtful, perceptive and well mannered fellow. So, I’m sure you’ll be able to explain some of the following to me.

      As you quite rightly point out, it’s absurd to believe that a young Filipina woman could have any sexual interest in an older white gentleman. However, what does seem very odd is the popularity among young western men of pornography featuring what are termed ‘Asian milfs’ where the objects of lust are similarly incomprehensible – I’m assuming it’s probably to do with hormones and diet or something of that nature, but I’m sure you’ll be able to explain.

      Another oddity I’ve ran into, is, as an older, single gentleman myself, that I’ve been propositioned and seduced on a few occasion by young women from prosperous European countries and other developed nations. Some of them even bought me drinks. For the life of me I can’t explain it, because clearly young women can’t possibly sexually desire an older man like myself, that doesn’t make sense at all. Especially when there’s young men like you around. If you could clear that up for me, I’d be most grateful.

      Finally, I have spent quite some time in the U.K., there’s no argument that it has some delightful towns and charming people, but I can’t say I noticed that it was notably blessed with a disproportionate number of gym toned, stunningly attractive, desirable young women. Did I visit the wrong towns and cities?

      I look forward to your reply.

  27. I am a white woman who got into a relationship with a Filipino man. He is precise, calculated, successful and I ended up leaving him even though we have a child together because I couldn’t handle how nosey the mothers are, the fact that his mom also lived with us, and he expected more than anyone else I’ve met. We have been divorced for over a decade now. I can say many things about the men, but I do know that they have certain expectations that you might not realize they’re dead serious about. I can also say many things about my ex, but he does still help me financially and I cannot bash his integrity. He just doesn’t have a lot of empathy or patience.

  28. You hear a lot of racist white people say crap like this. I had a white female tell me the only reason Filipina woman marry white men so the can get a visa and come here to the U.S and do what ever they want. This was less than a year ago. She and I have no dealings now. I saw what type of person she was.

  29. Well what a monologue we have here !! Whilst some of the points may be fair and just I find the vast majority of the points made are biased and generalised . It appears there is to much bitterness in the writers comments there is little room for reasoned debate. Most of the philipino people I have met are quite poor this is not a criticism but a fact! Some others are beautiful lady boys another fact . They use what. They have. To get a better life! So whats wrong with that? Don’t we all use what we have ?

    Now I feel is the time to end this post as I am running the risk of my very own monologue!!


  30. I love your article I’m a 29yr old american man and I just got engaged to a 33yr old Filipino woman,she is living in the uk because off work and everything you said is true she doesn’t care about money I tried to give her some and she got mad lol. But thanks again for this more people need the truth

    1. Lol! I remember when my boyfriend sent me money I felt belittled and insulted. I didn’t asked for it. I have a good job, not a high paying though but I can fairly support my self. We would end up arguing, so he stopped. We are on an LDR, hoping pH will open soon. In all fairness I finished 2 degrees, been to other countries before I met him ONLINE. All my family members are working professionals. I have my own little house. Maybe some guys should look a little bit further to find their own fili love. Good luck to all of you.

  31. Congrats. You are the slight exception, not the norm. If you’re both backpacking and traveling the world, you both come from decent money. Living “comfortably” is just a modest way of putting it and creating an image of self reliance. It is unlikely either of you know what real struggles are. Trying Immigrating on your own merit, no family at all, dead, making something of yourself through making so many sacrifices, blood sweat and tears just to have your dreams, savings and health literally shot down by xenophobic hicks only to get nothing in return, all whilst starting it all over again and not riding someones coat tail. Tons of Filipinas on the military installations in the U.S. A noticable percentage. And all they do mooch and cause issues. Check it out sometime.

    1. I’m sure most of your points are correct, but be careful to make a distinction between yourself and the majority. The question we really want answering is the question posed, namely, do the majority of Filipinas fit into this category? Is it a factor – if it isn’t, why is there so much conversation about it? I do think these beliefs are exaggerated, though. Wouldn’t say the same thing for Ukrainians, whoops!

      I disagree with your point number 6. Whatever bad things you might say about the UK, it is really good in one aspect, which you completely misconceived – actually, in the West in general, a street cleaner will make a decent wage if working full-time. I know from direct experience. We also don’t dock wages based on colour; a Pakistani nurse will earn as much as an African as a Caucasian. It’s the way it is. This is a very important point, because I have in fact lived in many countries, and I think we know that most countries will not pay a street cleaner 32,000 pounds a year. I think we know that most countries will have racism built into their salary spectrum. I challenge you to show me that the UK does, or indeed anywhere in Western Europe. If you challenge me to find this in just about every other country, well, it’s too easy.

  32. you are lucky and so is your husband. Many men get killed by filipino wives after she takes all his money.

  33. Enjoyed reading your words of wisdom . I have found in traveling the world we are all the same. We all want to be loved . We all want to be told Good Job ! We all want to treated with respect.

  34. Good for you. Very honest take on your relationship. However, this looks to me to be the exception rather than the norm. The reality is that other Filipinas won’t have had the same chances in life you had and need to make harsh choices to survive.

  35. I have a relationship with the woman from between Thai and Filipin. As my observation into global mainstream, I feel multi scale nationality relationship will be accerelated. Aging population for any developed nation is inevitably being increased. So this kind of relationship is one part of case example
    for globalization. I was reading with such impression.

  36. I haven’t been with any Filipina woman. I have been long distance dating a Filipina girl now for 10 months. With the Philippines locked down because of covid I can’t go there and ever time we try to meet in another country that doesn’t require visa there is still the 14 day quarantine. In which we would not be allowed to stay in the same room for that 14 days. I haven’t been with anyone in almost 2 years. I am a very faithful and loyal American white guy but sometimes I feel like giving up on this relationship. She tells me she is very loyal and faithful as well but then accuses me of lying to her and cheating on her. I understand that fillipina woman are very jealous and sometimes I can appreciate that but to be accused of cheating on several occasions when I’m not is getting tiresome. I guess I’m trying to find out if fillipina woman are worth the wait. She tells me about her girlfriends that have multiple boyfriends and her other girlfriends that are loyal but there boyfriends are cheating on them. I want to trust her and do trust her but not as much as I would hope. We haven’t met face to face which makes things difficult although we chat on messenger a lot. 10 months and counting. Not sure how long we can keep this up

    1. Don’t trust it’s best way to not get burned, they all know much better how to talk to strangers … If her friend have multiple boyfriends so she has also, just don’t waste your time on online entertainment, just go there when possible and never make online commitments, if you don’t like the situation quit, there are plenty of other fish in the sea that will make you happy

    2. Hang in there russ, ive been chatting with my filipina fiance 4 years now. Now that covid has everything screwed up, i cant bring her here but were keeping the faitj, id say she’s worth it. Im in love with her and the second the travel ban is lifted, im sending her money for her plane ticket and her 2 kids as well. Ive tried to send her money and she doesnt accept but ahe has none of her own. Keep praying my friend.

    3. hi russ! not all filipina are jealous type. maybe your gf is not matured enough, ready for a relationship or she doesn’t know what she want. It’s exhausting when the love of your life always accusing you. It’s a red flag! I dated with a foreign man also for 8 months now, we did not meet yet in person because of covid. We love and trust each other so we never had an arguments. Love should give you happiness not bitterness. There’s still a lot of good filipina out there all you need to do is to find the real one. Good luck!

      1. How can I trust someone u never met before. All that talk is nothing if u can’t interact in person it’s totally different in person that online. The only way to know that person is to stay with them. What a joke when all these Filipinas say they already love the kano before they even met

  37. My friend married a filipina so he could control her , and
    Disallow her to work , drive , and have friends in the usa . .
    In their first 3 years she’s been here , he’s kept a job for one year and baby 2 is on its way.
    Attention all Filipino women – know the man before you make that move to the usa with a looser husband.

  38. Well I did find this article via google trying to find somewhere to vent my frustration from today’s encounter encountered with a white man today I find disrespectful towards me and all of my fellow Filipina women. I am a cashier at a local Walmart and this was a customer I was cashing out. Prior to this encounter I was having a great day until this pig came to my lane and had to be the most annoying white man I have ever met in my whole existence. I find myself wonder the nerve he had the feel to disrespect Filipina women and that includes myself. While I was cashing him out, he started making comments like, “ I have many Filipina girlfriends, I don’t know how they are able to afford me, and was making annoying sound, sounded more like a pig sound and a smirk in his face that made my skin crawl. And he did make the comment not once, not twice , but three four times like I didn’t hear him the first time. Whatever he has experienced with Filipina women made this white, pig of a guy behave this way towards Filipina women. I am not one to judge people base on one encounter but base on what he was saying, I gather that he thinks ALL Filipina women are easy target, dumb, gullible, cheap and desperate to have white foreigner boyfriend that he can easily take advantage of. “Hey white man I served from Walmart @ Runnymede/St. Clair, I am a Filipina woman with lots of respect for myself, I don’t just pick a man, not any man; and most especially some guy whose belly is hanging out, out of shape and barely descent looking like you. I have preferences, I like tall, dark, handsome BLACK men who likes to wine and dine FILIPINA women such as myself. If you are reading this GO FUCK YOUR UGLY SELF!!!

    1. Good on you girl I’m an Australia and I have a fillapina girlfriend and she is such a beautiful woman so honest and loving and I am so in love with her we are so happy he probably got nocked back and rejection hurt his pride lol

    2. Wow. Who is worse, the dirty old white guy or the foul mouth Filipina?
      Why didn’t you say something to him instead of posting to this board where the chance of him seeing it is almost zero.
      Why do you feel the need to insult him back and share your preferences with strangers.
      How did he know you were a Filipina? Did he ask you or just assume? You could have shut him down in multiple ways, but you didn’t. It isn’t fair how he treated you, but it also isn’t right what you are doing.

  39. Hey Kach, very well written, with helpful intel. I’m an American and have spent 2 years in the Philippines. I’m currently in a relationship with a Philippina and marriage is in the future for us. You are an exception to the reality that most Philippina’s are born into poverty which greatly influences their life choices, and all too often those choices are self serving to ensure that they and their families do not suffer from a lack of basic survival needs. Rare, is the girl who comes from that poverty and is able to allow the love she has for her”magic white man” to supersede everything else. I found my Diamond in the rough. Never Settle, Rog.

  40. Although the author is nowhere near the perceived norm for Filipinas, there are a growing number who also do not easily fit into traditional pigeonholes.

    My Filipina was working 7 days a week when I met her. We met on a traditional dating site in the US and she lived an hour away from me. Our first date was a long motorcycle ride with a stop in a local park to chat a bit. She was 59 and fresh out of a 40 year marriage to her childhood sweetheart. All 5 of her children were born in the Philippines, although 2 of her daughters now lived in the US. She had been here 10 years. I am an active 62 and have so far been able to keep up with her 3 year advantage on me lol.

    She was definitely not looking for a visa, sugar daddy or white genes. Courting her was an experience; almost 50 when arriving in America, she was very traditional regarding dating. Downright provincial. Until I started researching her culture and dating traditions, I could not understand her actions and seeming reluctance to commit to a relationship. Additionally the only man she had ever been with had physically and emotionally abused her leaving her somewhat apprehensive about trusting a man. Ah well, “iniisip kita.”

    Fast forward to this year. The return on time invested has been phenomenal. We are as giddy as school kids in love for the first time. Yes she sends money to her family each month, and she takes great pride in that she earns every penny of it. She only works 5 days a week now (gotta draw the line somewhere) and she pays for her own car, wardrobe and accessories. Outside of the mortgage payment, we share all household expenses. I had quite a time getting her on my life insurance as a beneficiary, she fought it tooth and nail. Still not sure why she opposed it… My occupation is hazardous and I want her taken care of should the worst happen. Hardly the stereotypical gold digger of the comments section here.

    I’ve met her daughters. The youngest (24) still hopes for her parents reconciliation and resents me The oldest (41) knows of the abuse and unfaithfulness her mother has endured and is thrilled we are together. We spent Christmas with her daughter’s family and it was a wonderful experience. Her parents have passed, as have mine. I’m still meeting the rest of her family… via Skype and similar long distance programs. We may go to her home in the Philippines after Covid restrictions are lifted, but she will go for sure. Mainly to explain to her family in person why her previous marriage is over and she is now with an American. Like I said, traditional.

    Not typical by any means. My best advice would be to look for love instead of looking for race or nationality. Oh, and tampo? Yes, she tries it every once and a while. I scoop her up and take her to the couch and hold her in my arms while a romantic movie plays… she has never made it to the ending credits before softening.

  41. You are an unusual example. I’ve been married to a Pinay for 25 years. I have a good job but now I’m flat broke, living from pay check to pay check. Our townhouse was eventually repossessed & all my inheritance has gone on rent since then. She works but won’t share her money &
    She gets herself into debt. I’ve paid out all her debt in the past but now she is bankrupt. All the rent, school fees & expenses are paid by me alone. She’s not interested in helping. Her family are all the same. Even older family members have married retired men & are expecting to inherit their houses, leaving nothing for the children of the first marriage. Be careful!

    1. So right mate I also married 20 years but I am not going to loose myhome I have worked for all my life they are controlling ,nasty,shit on you very quick and stick to there kind only never help selfish I pity youbro hope you get back on your feet

    2. I know a guy that was married to a Filipina that developed a gambling problem. He basically lost everything and I mean everything! He eventually divorced her, then disappeared for awhile and ended up back in Cebu, and married another Filipina more than half his age. While he was married to this Filipina he was having an on-line relationship with another Filipina in Davao. So, he ends up divorcing again and now he is married to the Davao girl and she is even younger than his previous wife! Presently, he lives in the US with his 20 something wife. What a POS!

    3. i’m in the same boat, turning 60 and all my savings gone..
      married filipina 10 years ago, supported her from afar for 5 years and visited, built a house and moved there and 5 years later she was preggy with not my child and my bank was empty.
      at least i got out before she poisoned me and took my social security checks like all the other nice foreigners i’ve head about while living there.

      1. there are a lot of new philippines wanting to date me, i found it strange because i am twice the age, is it true that they are scammers and dangerous?

  42. I wanted to add that there are, of course, influencing factors that I did not mention such as fitness level, attractiveness of the parties, etc etc. I was just giving a rough idea of how I think it is for most females in the typical age-gap relationship in the Phillipines.

  43. This topic always incites a lot of arguments but as a female, I wanted to give my thoughts. I personally am of the opinion that if the man is over 10 years older, there is likely not a lot of physical attraction, romance, and that sort of “butterflies” experience one has at the start of a relationship. As the relationship progresses and if the man is maybe 12 – 15 yrs older, some romantic love and physical attraction can develop. If the age gap is more than 15 yrs, the relationship, in my opinion, is mostly transactional, with the woman pretending, more or less, to be in love. I find it bizarre that this is so hotly debated everywhere, when the facts are pretty clear: the vast majority of large age gap relationships occur when the girl is extremely poor. It is not often you see this phenomenon among the wealthier classes. Also, local marriages in the Phillipines have very small age gaps – one old study found they had the smallest age gaps among the countries in the developing world. I am sure there are many outliers – couples who are successful and genuinely in love – but I do not believe it is the norm in these foreigner-local age gap relationships. Phillipina women are raised to serve. Their personal happiness is often not given importance. Therefore, many are able to sacrifice their own happiness for the good of their families. I am Asian myself so very familiar with this sort of culture. Anyway, that is just my 2 cents.

    1. Well that’s your opinion but a lot of lovely relationships occur between older men and younger women… in the Philippines. Maybe you will see things differently over time.

  44. I love this article. It’s funny how people come up with all these stereotypes. I met my wife online by accident and I wasn’t really looking for anyone. I knew that there were scammers but they aren’t only in the Philippines they are all over the world. I told my wife that if she ever ask me for any money it would be over with between us. We video chatted for two and a half years on Facebook Messenger before we finally met each other face-to-face in the Philippines. I came to visit a second time one year later and then Less Than 3 months after that her and her two kids now of 21 and 22 we’re on their way to America 2/2/2019. I’m 62 and my wife is 43 and we both have a very beautiful relationship. Her kids hungry every night before bed. I don’t support her whole family either. I have offered to help out from time to time with certain things but nobody has ever ask me for anything.

    My wife is very beautiful too by the way. I don’t know what she sees in me. I’m not rich either. She could have anyone that she wants but she chose to be with me. We were married two weeks after she arrived in America.

  45. hi, i guess you are pinay i can write magandang umaga or hapon according your time.. i interested in pinay. i improved my poor english and began learn tagalog too. but i should notice, many pinay from dating site cupid really want foriengers money.. i have many experience at first i really send some money, she lie i give it back to you. other told me story about hard life or school fee. i stoped this. i chatted with more pinay and i should blocked more of them for beg money. but i met only few who really liked me… sorry i should to say. its not myth or only says that many pinay really love only foreingers money.. show me pinay who really wants and love not rich european, except you. becuase i like asian women i dont stop my effort only changed my attention to indonesian or vietnamese. sorry. i had one pinay uyab ( GF i hope uyab is correct ) too i wanted her my asawa. she didnt beg until we met. but there she asked me for money too. at least she left me. i have some nice experiences with pinay but i lost much money for one and a few for some other.. and where is some thankfull pinay who love me ? i cant recomend to pinay to foriengers without warning. avoid pinay who begin talk about some problems or says some sad story.. avoid this kind of pinay.

  46. I actually don’t need to read everything you wrote because I agree with you. Happy to share that I’ve read one of your articles earlier and I’m sure it helped me and my then-boyfriend because now we’re engaged. Yeap, I’m applying for visa to get there but that’s because we love each other. No other reason.
    ? kapwa iska!
    P.S. not only we, Filipinas are lucky to have them. Works both ways most of the time.

  47. Filipinas can’t get to the states easily unless they have money. My husband had an affair with a Filipina half his age. We reconciled and she refuses to take his pictures off social media and is pretending she is still with him. She expected him to send her money to pay the electric bill in the apartment they rented after he moved back to the states. She never paid a dime for food, bills, rent, etc the 5 months she leached off my husband. She quit her job within a few weeks of meeting him (moved in with him on the first day). She got an online job making okay money and sent it all back to her family. She even hinted for my husband to buy a computer for her sibling. So, my experience was that he was with a real gold digger who had no respect for the sanctity of marriage. She knew we were married and that we had 2 kids and she didn’t care. At first she said she didn’t want to come to the US then suddenly she was pressuring him for a fiancé visa, which was impossible because we were still married.

  48. First, She is an exceptional woman….not typical from philipinnes…and you cant travel all over the world with your philipinnes passport you need a visa everywhere as we dont want refugee….most decent countries requires a visa with reason. I dont know any pinays thats has ever done a back pack trip on her own….nerver seen that…. your ans exceptional pinay and therefore you opinion is not reflecting the reality…..it refelcts your reality which is not the people reality. Having said that I have a nice loving philipinno girlfriend that refuses my money regularly so I can confirm its not only about the ability to provide but more for our ability to carry on a good relationship. If I have an advice for foreigner……go to the province and avoid big tourist area, your more likely to find someone amazing like mine.

  49. Well guys, after all reading here, I can tell I can rely on some of the posts done by visitors. No offense to anyone, but this page seems to me a bit biased.
    Now of course if you find the real thing you will think in one direction, but we must see the bad also. Can you imagine someone being deceived for months? Guys we are talking about months of ones life here. I think I take my fill of Pinay before even met one 🙂

    BTW: Congrats for the website… it is one of the things we need in life (among many many wrong things online).

  50. You failed to mention the usual scenario. Nearly all the time the Filipina has a local boyfriend but gets involved with a foreigner so he can support them. Obviously the foreign guy doesn’t know about the local boyfriend but he only sees her a couple of weeks a year so it’s easy to fool him. Most Filipinas are liars and most foreign guys are idiots. They deserve each other!

    1. half is truth.. really many pinay scammer there. not all i have some pinay friends i belive them. but mostly pinay from dating sites are really scammer. but you hurted me that im idiot and deserve this.. i really loved some pinay. i thought she love me too. i wanted to see her ID that she is not married. i wanted to see her on camera often. in her house in her bedroom.. if she played game she is good actor. other pinay lie about borrow money.. i belive that small amount is not problem give back. but they lie and never give back even though small amount.. i tried this only short time. if they never publish our photo or status anywhere i dont belive this kind of pinay. sweet kidding only. but i still belive some pinay are really good women. and not all foreing men deserve this.. some wants sex only but some really love pinay. dont judge all men pls

  51. Hello,
    Well I am dating a foreigner because I like them, I like them because they know how to do household, they are independent…they tell you straight to the point.

      1. hello, I’m serious about a relationship and would like to find a wife. Have you any advice on where I can look at it?
        thank you

  52. The Philippines of past and now are different. Now filipina after enjoying Filipino bf n getting few children or at least one. Look for foreign soulmate.. To support financially . Suddenly filipino country man become bad guy. I have very bad experiences recently. After more than two years of relationship, she suddenly disappeared. My gf Amy Banas from Crispo,Sara, iloilo. Only because of money. No.money no honey. She now desperate to find white man and money.
    Dreaming went to Manila and did some modeling. Some naked photo to put in Facebook. Now landed in call girl racket in Manila. She is not beautiful but computer made her look like super model.
    How a filipina like to be super rich over night is in prostitutes business.
    I mean to say no.money no honey in Philippines. Yes there are also very good girls I meet. Go to province to find really good girl. Not in big city,photo are fake,woman in street mostly hospitality girls to foreigner. One will be deceived. Most girls have more than one bf
    And do part time sex work. I write with my experience. I am visiting Philippines from 1976 till now when I was exchange student.

    1. there are a lot of new philippines wanting to date me on facebook, i thought it was strange because i am twice the age, is it true that they are scammers and dangerous, i already suspected of everything? strange thing is that many want to move to my country which is Brazil. I wouldn’t pay for the travel ticket because I’m afraid that they won’t even get on the plane to come and just want to give me damage by losing the money for her flight to come.

  53. This is common sense at its best and also really sweet 🙂 Far too much stereotyping going on, there are people that do stuff for the wrong reasons and people that do stuff for the right reasons, in all walks of life, as you point out so well. Sounds like an amazing future you both have planned and the fact you are both in love and chasing your dreams together is really heartwarming. I wish you both the very best future 🙂

  54. Some of your statements are untrue. Whilst many filipinas are good, a lot of them want the short cut to success by deceit. I’ve experienced the worst in the last 2 years with a deceptive filipina. Thank God i have a great 6th sense and i got to find out she was cheating on me and 4 other men too. She is one of the reasons why filipina ladies get a bad name. She is more like an escort. I wish i could name and shame her but i won’t. A warning to all foreigners … visit your long distance girl, spend a lot time with her and make sure you visit her family. The moment you see some resistance or evasiveness, get your heart out of that relationship like i did.

    1. Do you think these lying and cheating and deceitful acts are a cultural thing in the Philippines or a reflection on what westerners before you have done these things to them?

    2. I sympathize with you for having had that experience mate, but white British, African American women, Hispanic, Italian, you name it… There are women like that in every nationality, but there are also amazing, loving, caring women of the said nationalities too, it’s the individual, not their sex or ethnicity

    3. Hello,i read your message all i can say is not all filipina are the same..yes its true at this time you can just fine good/ seruise is in province part.. take care and godblesa

    4. I just did that today, she was telling me she loved me, telling me she needed milk for baby and the kid had dengue fever, then the brother in Mindanao was in hospital,, I found her fake book alter ego, and after she tried to tell me it was her sister she finally come clean once I screen shot the evidence and then after scamming me for 3 months she come clean,, she is trying to get back with her ex another gullible foreigner, but she wants to stay as a friend in my life ,,, TALAGA get rid of the liars

  55. I meet a Filipino woman She has a house but shares with her children which are grown She wants to get married and have our own place and still help out her children I having a hard time with this Her kids should have there own place by now Do you have any advice

  56. Actually most Filipinas are not doing that well and money is the chief motivation to pursuing a relationship with a foreigner unless you choose to willingly play that down as not being that prevalent. Most not all, but most can’t wait to leave their country and are more than willing to settle anywhere else. There’s a reason why millions of them are on every dating site imaginable and I personally know quite a few of them. So I understand your patriotism but you should also be honest about your portrayal of the typical Filipina coz you’re way off from reality.

  57. The Filipina wife is not the issue – she will stand by her man and do all she can to solve problems. The area the Westerner MUST check is the family, its attitude and its size. (And age, see medical bills below)

    Filipino kids are brought up to feel guilt (incredible guilt, really) if they are not taking care of their parents in particular and this care risks very quickly changing from the child (your wife) visiting with food to the Western husband being told to send money – and lots of it.

    This will become a conflict area in 99.9 % of marriages. The parents will never love you (understandably as you more often than not will take their child to the West) but they will love your money and work the wife like nuts to feel guilty about not sending enough. I bought the family a new taxi car, renovated the house and sent designer clothes by ship….then found out they had pressured my wife so much she was stealing money from my bank account and sending it there.

    We nearly broke up over this of course. The parents did not give a damn, they still maintained it was right I took care of them and that she ‘borrowed’ money from my accounts behind my back.

    If the parents are old take into account probable medical bills and a total insistence you will pay – the bills are ridiculous due to every test possible being taken (of course). Everything has a ‘fee’ in the P.Pines.

    Filipina girls are lovely and have a great set of morals but they are IMPOSSIBLE to talk with on this subject and you will be given a week’s silent treatment if you ever criticise the amounts going home to Mum and Dad (minimum). Go too far and she will choose a life in poverty with them over you. They call it noble, I call it awful and selfish parenting.

    If I had known how bad it would be I would not have married, I have to say.

    Sorry my post reads negatively – I have said nice things too – but I cannot stress enough how important it is for you to clear the above area as best you can before marrying.

    You may well think your wife would never take money from your account or demand you pay bills and send gifts to Mum and Dad.

    She will. All you can and should do it talk it through and get some hard agreements in place before it all unfolds and gets out of hand.

      1. Oh man your story sounds very much like mine. It is very inspiring. I was going to fly to the Philippines to meet her for the first time, but the covid got in the way. I’ve been scammed before and now I have trust issues in this LDR. She never asks for money, and we’ve been chatting for 3 years now. She is also beautiful. I’m 17 years older and I don’t know why I’m her #1 pick. Every guy that talks to her, flirts with her. She says one thing she likes is that I’m the only guy who never once asked her for naked pics. We plan to get married and have kids I hope we love and trust eachother the way you and your lady do. Thank you for your story.

    1. Just because your wife did this means my wife will too? I’ve been with my Filipina wife for fourteen years. This year we’ve helped her family because of Covid and previously, we helped when her mother was terminally ill – isn’t this what you do when your family needs you?
      While we say no more than we say yes, and it isn’t often that people ask, my wife has never gotten mad when I say no. she tells her family, he earns the money and doesn’t have to give it to anyone if he doesn’t want to.
      We usually are asked to loan the money, but we never loan money. No way to be disappointed if they don’t pay you back. An example, is recently my brother-in-law asked if we would borrow (loan) him the money to pay off his motorcycle. He had lost his job due to Covid and was three payments behind. Even if he started working it would be difficult for him to pay us. We knew he was going to start working again soon, so we paid four payments (three back payments and the current month) and told him it was a gift. Now he has incentive to make sure he gets his job back.
      We also gave money to another brother who was three months behind in rent. Until Covid he never asked to borrow any money. Do you say no to a family member who will be out on the street if you can help? I never heard of such a thing in my American culture, so why would I say no in my wife’s culture.
      While it is true that families can be very difficult on their daughters who marry foreigners, it is ultimately her decision how to handle it. If you have one who is willing to bleed you drive to benefit her family – don’t blame her for your poor choice.

  58. Lovely site, I think I have something to say about this subject which is the Filipina+Foreigner relationship.
    I will go straight forward. In May 2017 I went to the Philippines to visit my Filipina chatmate after around one year of communication exchanging thought. When we met at the airport, it was like Love was waiting for us. We fell in love crazy and it was a paradise for us. After a while, we started to quarrel due to different ways of thinking regarding matters of life. Of course its a long story, but although we had our differences this blazing flame kept on glowing in our hearts. The relationship was on and off until we finally separated in Jan. 2018. we both decided to move on wishing all the best for each other. However, despite we were living apart this flame never got extinguished. In fact, I had a business meeting in manila on Dec. 2019. While over there, I thought of sending her a greeting message as a friend. To my surprise, she left her work and never looked back and wanted to greet me in person. Her employer warned her that she might either lose her job, cut off her salary and make her pay a penalty. Although she was relying on her modest salary to make a living, she turned her back and said I don’t care. She travelled 5 hours on the bus after agreeing to meet at Glorietta2 main gate. She arrived and waited for me for one hour due to heavy traffic jam in Makati. But, when we met we realized that we have a true love relationship never based on convenience or getting a visa or such. It was pure love after one year of separation. Now we are together for good knowing that we belong to each other regardless of any benefits. Finally, myself and my GF Yulanda we believe we have a long love story worth for a romantic Holywood movie, and I wouldnt exchange her for any woman in the world. In fact, I wish all foreigners who are after a filipina get lucky and find one like her as I did. Thats my opinion about good filipinas. Tony

    1. I mst one on eris she is in davo city. We recently started dating but on jan 16th shebasked if i could help her eith a dslr camera she said she was at her parents for a funeral.i said i could not she felt i was going to judge her . the second timr she asked fornhelp was for a phils passport to hong kong for a job. She said she didnt have the funds because she gave her fakily koney for farm. She started ignoring and now missed her opportunity to go back home jan 30th for her moms bday. She said she loves me but now the cinversation just falls flat for hours. Befor though we were talking alot all day

      1. She isn’t talking to you because you won’t give her money. she is busy trying to get money from someone else who looks as if they are more likely to say yes. This isn’t that difficult you know.
        If you have nothing (which many of these filipinas don’t) and you are from a culture where you are expected to share, and you believe that all foreigners are rich, then it is easy to ask for money. Some know it is a scam, some even feel bad for doing it, but for many, it just fits with their culture and understanding of your culture

  59. I been married to an Arab man from Jordan for almost tree years now and before he come here in Philippines I have already my own home but he never knew about it when he knew me through online dating, less than 1month he wanted to marry me and live together here in Philippines also he put up business here in my own hometown town for our good future, so far our business I considered it as a successful because we help each other, respect, and understand each other . I am blessed because my family supporting us whatever our plan is, my parents never bother us about money because both our parents have there own businesses he is a Muslim and I am a Christian but we never fight because of religion I respect HIM and HE respect ME, and if we have family gathering if one of my relative taking advantage on him I immediately talk to them that what they are doing to my husband is not good I will never to tollirate it and its not about greedy I just don’t want that they will USED to it because he is foriegner, I don’t care if I hurt them feelings because I believe that I am doing this for the good of EVERYONE especialy I AM FILINA with principle and life and dignity.

    1. Hi I am new to this meeting people online like facebook whatsapp and there are many more. I was told there was a dating site called Scout.
      I thought it would not hurt to check it out. As a resullt I started up a conversation with a women from the phillipines on the site.
      We have been chatting now for about over 3 mths. The conversation came up about vacation. I said to her that I have never did any traveling before and was considering to this year.
      She mentioned I should vacation in the phillipines and that we could visit the many island and beaches.
      We seem to be on the same page as our views and values. I just turned 61 my wife here in Canada passed away almost 1 year ago and I am wanting to meet someone for companionship and she is looking for the same. She has said she is looking for a relationship with the right person. She is 54 and I she was married and it did not work out I did not endulge her much on the reasons or why.
      We have shared pic and videos back and forth and she seems to be very transparent and sincere. She sugested that we could spend some time together in Thialand and then visit a few of the islands in the Phillipines with some of her family. We seem to many of the same values and she it looking for a relationship and to find someone to share life and grow older together. I am starting to have feelings towards her and I think she is feeling the same.
      The only real concern I have is it is said go by your gut feeling I mine is saying go. She has share some of her personal information with me not at my request. Like her TCN card from the Phillipines which I think I like our SIN card here in Canada. Also she shared her passport info by sending pictures of as maybe she was trying to show me she is sincere. I am green when it come to travel and would appreciate some imput into if anyone has and sugestions or comments would be appreciated.

  60. Wonderful article! As an American man married to a beautiful (inside as well as outside) Philippina woman, I can vouch that Philippina women are hard working and contribute equally, if not more. I found my dream woman in a Philippina! Great article again! Many many great years ahead to you and your husband!

  61. I don’t think your knowledge of American currency and economics was enough to make a section about it in this article but okay.

  62. Good Article, Im french and I have been in a relationship and living with a filipina (wich end badly, but that another story) but I know that there is so many cliché both on philippines side and also in western side do deal with.

    1. Andrei… stick with European women.. way more beautiful and they actually have a brain. Yes they will tell you what they think but you can have an intelligent conversation.

      1. Actually ….when one speaks about love, race and ethnicity are never the right basis to consider Whether that individual comes from Europe, America, Africa or Asia and there is no such thing as superior from each other.
        One cannot say that there is more superior from a certain race and another certain race…..

      2. Did you really just say Filipinas don’t have a brain and you can’t have a conversation with them? How many relationships did you have before deciding these points?
        Maybe you just chose the wrong ones. Maybe you were looking in the wrong places. Maybe you were looking for the wrong thing and then later wanted more. I worked in Europe for years; there are indeed beautiful and intelligent women there, just like in the Philippines and every other country in the world – you just have to know how to find them. Apparently you don’t.

  63. Quote: “…this is a hangover of the American occupation.” This is a rather strange statement. I am familiar with the Japanese occupation of the Philippines from 1941 to 1945. However, I have not heard of any “American occupation” of the Philippines. Perhaps you are talking about the heroic American liberation of the Philippines.

    1. It’s not a strange statement at all if your concept of history predates WWII. You’ll be sure to find out all about the American occupation if you look back to around 1900.

      Future president Taft was tasked by T Roosevelt with quelling filipino unrest. He did so brutally and efficiently.

      Not much heroic about that one.

      1. The American occupation of the Philippines in the late 19th, early 20th century, was brutal – rape , torture, massacre. The Americans came as conquerors, not liberators. Perhaps you should read a little factual history of the period, not propaganda.

        1. Lol Tony! !
          You gossip like the church choir,

          The Americans and their allies liberated the Philippines from the Japanese.

          The Americans lost the first fight to the Japanese in the Philippines because American forces were busy elsewhere in the world and spread to thin to win the first battle.

          The Japanese invaded the Philippines in the beginning just like they bombed USA’s Pearl Harbor killing innocent men, women, and children in their sleep.

          All Philippine soldiers the Japanese didn’t kill were imprisoned in p.o.w. camps.

          The Americans returned as heroes and liberated all of the Philippine soldiers from the p.o.w. camps.
          & freed the civilian Philippine families.

          If it wasn’t for the USA & it’s allies returning as promised the Philippines families who resisted would have been murdered and all Philippine people would be speaking Japanese as the #1 language.
          And maybe no Tagalog at all.

          The Americans remained in Manila Philippines and “only occupied” the USA army Air Force base now called Clark Base,

          The Philippine government now refers to the base as Clark Base.

          The Americans never owned the property,

          It occupied it by lease for military strategy to help defend the Philippines and payed rent.

          If what you say were true Tony!
          If the Americans weren’t friendly to the Philippine people and Philippines government then the Americans would have seized Clark army Air Force base as the Americans named it in WW2

          In fact if what you say were true Mr Tony !

          You claim the Americans we’re conquerors and not friendly liberators .

          Lol !
          If that were true the Americans would not have given the Philippines people their country back.

          During the war the only part of the Philippines the USA military continued to occupy on a large scale was in Manila Philippines and only for as long as it took to free the Philippines people and return to them what was theirs.

          We are their friends !

          My mother was an army Air Force flight nurse stationed at Clark Base in Manila Philippines during WW2 and received the bronze star for bravery for dragging a plane full of wounded soldiers off the hospital plane she was working on when it was shot down near Manila Philippines.

          I know the true stories and have the real photographs of the truth.

          When I hear people like you Tony spreading Fake News because you listen to gossip.

          I tell the truth !

  64. Dear Kach,
    I had an awakening today about my dating life or so I say… I just typed the question on google about how I feel at the moment and found this site, it made me smile reading your journey together to a happy life as a couple. I feel like I won’t have the same fate that you Kach had found with Jon.
    I think I am just a passing for Western men around me, though I only have one whom I get to have a constant “casual” relationship with and he is a colleague of mine. Today, I found out unintentionally that he is already with somebody and he took her for a weekend with his family. I am telling myself, there will be no more flirting and other salacious words or gestures with him from now on. Not because I feel bad or hurt, but because he will be betraying his woman’s trust if we do.
    I will definitely follow this site for more of your stories together. And, will you be kind enough to share your Instagram and Facebook pages too.

  65. An 2013 I started an online friendship with a man while working and traveling to build a marketing business that failed.
    He sends me sweet emails and text me to let me know he care.
    I find him very attractive, very smart, I’m very wealthy man
    Who is well spoken my husband speaks poorly. I’ve become quite embarrassed Over the Years . I stay with him more for convenience and money than love and security.

    1. It’s a matter of perfect timing,not all black men are the same,and I’m confused if you were a male or a female,you refer yourself as a MAN,but you talk like you’re a woman,I’m really confused

  66. I truly wanted to be married to a white Foreigner. the truth is most Filipina women seek to Mary white men. the ones who marry Filipino or black men we basically settle . most Filipino men don’t want us. They marry white women, I have many regrets of marrying a black man.
    He too insecure. He too jealous.
    his life beholds too many lies
    I feel ashamed after so many years he only disappoints me more times than can you make me happy.

    1. And better communication between partners or a couple needs further efforts,keep on trying,never stop reaching out to him,everyone has it own reason why we act like this or that,try to be more understanding since both of you are married,do you get me?

      1. Because all of them are Putas… pangungutya.. these pinyas see a white guy and think $$$ and green card.
        Stay away plus they are full of STDs. All of them not just the bar girls.

    1. Yes. She was total crap. She threw a blow dryer at the 70yo man when he asked her for a divorce. He had to get stitches and lied and said that he had an accident while workin with a band saw. ?

  67. If a filipina married an American male 3yrs ago, but stole his money & now the male is divorcing her-is there ANY way he can get her deported?

  68. really? not true. The reason why filipina married foreigners is because they are the one who could support their needs specially money. I honestly dont beleive in filipinas who keeps on insisting that they truly love the american guy. Filipinas are the one who are the biggest enemy for the amarican guys. They just use american money.

  69. Interesting entry. I have travel to the Philippines many times and always look forward to the adventure. Seems that the people there generally are more concerned about family and loved ones than a person’s sexual orientation or alternative lifestyles. The Philippine President is a prime example. They are also more concerned with the sanctity of a child’s life.

  70. The Filipino will still find a way of getting her hands on the western mans $. That’s the way it is . Doesn’t matter what relative is a doctor or graduate of university of Philippines . The Filipina woman is looking for the payday . They are all grifters.

    1. You sound bitter. What if that is okay with the western guy? What if the western guy saves money his entire life but gets bored with his culture and is happy to share his money with a Filipina regardless of her motivations. What’s wrong with that? It’s his money and he can do what he wants with it, right. There is a saying that all gambler gamble to lose. Well maybe the “white” guy just needs to be honest with himself.

      1. honest with himself..that he’s bored with his culture and prefers to have his life savings stolen…hmm..you need to be honest with yourself.

  71. Hello I find this article useful interesting because I have a foreign man too. We are LDR for almost 4 years we started 2016, but before we have this LDR I have my Filipino boyfriend before and honestly it was devastating experiences I had way back time (I am hardly to moved on for 2years until one day woke up I am finally okay) and then try to join dating site I think it’s “Filipino Cupid” if I don’t forget. There’s a lot of foreign there and mostly they wants sex and pleasure only, but because I am conservative Filipina I refused those kind of man and made me disappointed as I thought they are all the same “pervert and playing around”.

    Until one day there’s an email I received and it look interesting when I open the email I checked the profile of the sender, but made me annoyed and disappointed because the profile is real empty no description not like mine with full of description to describe my self( on my profile I indicate all what I like and my dislikes) after viewing the senders profile, I send an email as reply “Are you hiding from someone?”

    I was mad at that time because I received “HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA” reply, (I was about to smash him if he’s near me I am completely angry ?)

    Fast forward

    Our relationship now is getting stronger ups and down I am always cheering him up. He don’t have a plenty of money yes! Because all I want is HIM, his love to me that made me complete as a woman.

    Oh i forgot to tell you I am a working student, and now 2yrs left and I will graduate and get my diploma and I want him to be proud of me all my life I live like an independent woman and all I want is to be with him all my life I want to be a better woman and show to him that I deserve to be his wife soon.

    We do always video chat every day before I started my day work while him about to sleep. There’s one time that he made me cry because of something or fact that “he is older than me” he told me that he’s older that me and there’s a fact that he will die first before me. I was crying not because I am scared but because I knew already what he means to say but I never think of that way. I really really love my boyfriend I don’t mind about age barrier because with him I felt the love that I really deserve.

    He never disrespect me for almost 4 years he never say rude things to me. What can I ask for more? I have my dream man and nearly getting be together.

    Oh we are 28years gap and we really had similarities, the way we think, likes and dislikes. All I can say is I already met my behalf.

    For 1year way back 2017 to 2018 in his downfall life I never leave him(it’s really hard for us because I can’t comfort him for the reason we are far away to each other) I always cry seeing him with his depression but I can’t tell him how hurt I am because all he wants is for me to be happy ( because he knows my hardships too, study, work, study work).

    All I do is pray for us to be together soon and we are working it out now planning to have holidays together after I graduate that is why I am working so hard now to see him soon.

    I don’t mind other people what they say about our relationship because they don’t know what we struggled to be this far.

    All I care is to be the man I loved. Age is just a number for real, my boyfriend is not rich and I don’t care if other will judge me( because of the reasons of those scammers Filipina ruined our dignity) it’s their problem not mine.

    I dated a Filipino the same age as mine but they are just playing around so what’s different? If other pinays looking for money, me no. I want love, because this isn’t the only thing that you can’t buy money. Money is not permanent but love you can have it forever with the right person.

    Thanks, and have a good day!

    1. Interesting entry. I have travel to the Philippines many times and always look forward to the adventure. Seems that the people there generally are more concerned about family and loved ones than a person’s sexual orientation or alternative lifestyles. The Philippine President is a prime example. They are also more concerned with the sanctity of a child’s life.

  72. Interesting read. Thanks

    There a few different answers to your views above?.

    For example; you come from a professional family yet many Filipinos may come from blue collar life and live in poverty (I’ve travelled throughout the Philippines and have seen plenty). If you date a poor filipina it’s most certain that you’ll expected to help he family. I’ve dated a few filipinas and when I’m working overseas they appreciate it if I send them money.

    And for many less privileged finipinas having a white or Caucasian boyfriend is considered a catch.

    I could on a bit further but just wanted to point out that one needs to understand test there will be varying experiences for western men in the Philippines . I have a few western friends married to filipinas and they do indeed take care of their wives families and sometimes extended family.

    Best wishes all.

  73. I had an ear-to-ear grin after reading your article and was chuckling for days thinking about it so thought I’d share my thoughts and experience of Filipinas.

    So firstly, to the article you wrote, very well put.

    My partner is Filipina and I’m from Australia. Our relationship is based on equality and trust as it’s foundation, not master and slave, nor do I remember ordering my wife from a catalogue, although I have to admit she would look damned good as a model in one! She’d sell a hell of a lot of lingerie and swim suits, has a killer body and is one of the most desirable women you’ll ever meet!

    In fact, in terms of self respect my partner was in my estimation harder to court than any Western fluzy at a pub after a dozen beers that just needs a nibble on the ear to get her to go home with you.

    I spent weeks trying to convince her to take me out.

    Her family wasn’t wealthy and she came from a rural area in one of the off-limits areas where marital law is required and bombings are prevalent (in fact, one of the worst of the worst areas), though you know what? This grounded her in reality and meant she knew the value of life (or lack of it sometimes), the difficulties of surviving, that work was needed to put food on the table and that sacrifices need to be made to get ahead in life.

    When I met her she was also supporting her elderly parents, had a five year old son from an abusive previous relationship with a Filipino man and was working full-time to support them all. How many Westerners do this?

    She also had a passport long before she met me.

    So what is her character like?

    She is fiercely independent, extremely loyal, loving, fair, she listens to me and asks intelligent, thoughtful questions in context with what you’re saying so is therefore an active listener, she’s family-oriented, caring, giving and compassionate… and she’s also great in bed and we’re in tune with each other’s desires!

    To be frank, we met about six months after my first wife of 20 years passed away from a very aggressive cancer that killed her in under two years, and she was what made me want to even keep living. She helped me adjust to the loss, understood that my previous partner still had a place in my life, she honoured my previous partner and still goes with me to my previous partner’s resting place to place flowers on her wall plaque every week because she knows how much my previous partner meant to me and that it was a love story cut short.

    She understood loss because living in the Philippines isn’t all paved roads and supermarkets and is often tragedy, mud, death from disease, trying to scrounge for food to put on the table and often sleeping on the floor in a fibro or corrugated iron shed of an uncle, auntie or friends of the family just to stay dry and sometimes living in a room with 10 other people just to survive, especially in rural areas.

    Does my Filipina partner still sound like a mail order bride to you? She’s certainly no geisha or flower that wilts in the first sun and is more of a soldier that’s been through more in her life then most Westerners can ever imagine.

    Most Westerners wouldn’t last a week in the slums of the Philippines where anything that stays still long enough is going to be roasted for dinner, including rats.

    I grew up in some pretty bad neighbourhoods in Melbourne, so know what the streets can dish out and the Philippines makes hard people, though it also makes caring people that roll with the punches in whatever life throws at them.

    Point of fact : there are still a lot of racist, bigoted morons on the planet that whilst apparently being “supremely white” don’t realise they’ve been left far behind in terms of reality and that gene diversity and multi culturalism are in fact creating stronger people than isolationist, idealistic views solely derived from ignorance and narrow-mindedness.

    My partner is the toughest, classiest broad you’ll ever met in terms of intestinal fortitude and courage and she’s pragmatic too. I like tough women and she’s like my previous partner in that regard.

    Mail order bride… ahuh, yeah right! Filipinas are the kind of woman you want standing beside you in battle actually. Treat them well and they’ll be your life partner. Treat them badly and welcome to Hell… “Happy wife, happy life” ring any bells?

    If you’re thinking of looking for a mail-order bride that’s subservient, then look somewhere else… You’re not going to find push-overs in the Philippines. And yes, we share all bills too…

    Guys, Daisy and I want to come travelling with you next time you go on a trip. We’re in!

  74. Why is there a stereotype about Philippinos and not about French women? I am just wondering. That is all.

  75. That’s hilarious. So true. Fucin old men with teenage girls. How can a country allow this. Population control and more sex education is required here. Yes they do have compassion for health care, as I have experience, that I will admit.

  76. May 15 2019
    I see most of your comments are by the female gender. I married a girl, worked in Canada and had very small family in the Philippines. As I had been dating Asian women before I understand the need to support their families. No problem. Moved down to the Philippines and problems started. The attitudes of Philippino people against me is staggering. ” Joe ” what’s that. Too much here to post, anyways I couldn’t care less about these idiots. Her brother, now that’s everything in one package. The lack of support I get from my wife too makes want to warn all to stay single. Her response to him is that ” that’s just Philippino men ” what… They get to be completely useless…. Doesn’t bath, clean, help or speak English, even if he’s educationed. Doesn’t close the door when he urinates, cover his mouth when coughing, clips nails and hair throughout the house, only thinks about himself. I can’t imagine if the shoe was on the other foot, my house my investment, my concerns, my caring about the environmental impact. Doesn’t care regardless. One guy here, unlike my friend Paul with 40 individuals in his family, he made the mistake in opening his wallet. God rest his soul, as he passed away this year, probably stress related. I can appreciate the attraction I get from the Philippinos. Feel like a movie star, but now I have realized it’s the wallet that’s shining. Example, 68 year old Tony with a 38 year old girl, why….. I’ve read another website here, that explains the complications like you have. It’s a manual for guys like me…. Huh…? Why wasn’t that in the contract I signed for marriage. I don’t feel this should be part of any relationship. We Canadians deal with the gold-diggers and chain smokers, but not the whole bullshit outside of this. I have tried to comprehen the Philippinos ways and excuses are all that comes out. People marry and deal with problems together. Philippino, their way, no matter what the problem is. My wife can’t see how she is being manipulated through her brother. He has food, shelter, entertainment, and money to care for my two cats, from our funds, to watch our home, and he can’t even get off his ass to do anything.

    1. The problem sounds like it might be you. You need to grow a pair and set ground rules when it comes to family. They ARE your family, so expect to help out, but directly address “How much” helping out you are willing to do, what type of help it is, and WHO will be in your family circle. Supporting her third cousin just because of pressure from the family is a big no.

      If I were in he states and my parent (or parents) were elderly and in need, I’d let them move in rather than send them to a home… Or maybe pay extra to keep them in a private nursing facility versus a state home/hospital. This is no different. Maybe cheaper. Helping family… within reason.

      Usually if your bride tries to set boundaries like this and attempts to convey your thoughts her family will tell her she’s “changed” and we both know that’s a bit too much for most Filipinas to withstand without giving in. You need to do it. You need to have the discussion… You need to relocate the brother (assuming he’s an adult) even if it costs you now. No free rides. If he’s a minor under your care then it’s REALLY time to put the hammer down.

      I’m personally okay with $200.00 per month towards the immediate family and any emergency medical expenses if they arise. They can spend the $200 on food and clothes, or they can spend it on karaoke… I don’t care. The well runs dry after it’s spent. In MY case I know it’s needed and spent on necessities. Some may say I’m cheap… Others will only budget $50/month. Whatever works for you is fine but stick to it. NO exceptions.

      My plan has changed over the years as my Filipina is STUBBORN and was never comfortable with me sending the money. This, even though SHE couldn’t tell them “No” under pressure of her family so she started working. Her money goes home, and she’s held to the $200.00 rule. I’ll admit that GIFTS sent home have certainly improved since she’s been the one paying for them!

      Time to make changes before you become a door-mat. Let your wife know those changes will happen with OR without her. Think about it… Does she love and respect you? Will she stand with you or is she in it for her family? It’s time to find out if you need to swap positions of the “A” and the “E” in your first name.

  77. This author may be the exception but over 90 percent of Filipinas are money-grubbing human cockroaches. And no not every Filipino can get a USA visa. They want a white man to pay for them and their extended family. This is why you see losers with Filipinas in the USA. They have been long disowned by their families, have had drug issues, etc. Hence some become backpackers and “travelers.” This is called “being unemployed.” What little money they do have is more than anyone gets from being a prostitute on the third world island of floating garbage known as the Philippines. On a positive note most Filipinas are beautiful and very intelligent and get good jobs in the USA (usually nurses) and end up supporting their loser husband.

    1. projecting. sounds like you got scammed because of your stupidity or you just can’t find a Filipina that is into you aside from your money (if you have it). lmao SO BITTER

      1. 90%? … Let me adjust the figure to be 100% of the one single Filipina that saw a fool looking to lose his money.

        Every country has scammers. It’s you horny fools that don’t research and learn… You don’t use common sense and let your “little head” do the thinking… You are so excited to take advantage of an “easy thing” that YOU, yourself, become the easy thing.

        Put any (Ignorant) rich foreigner in the U.S. or Canada and there will be THOUSANDS of gold diggers looking for a sugar-daddy if he’s stupid enough to open his wallet. When the money is gone, so are they…

        Who put this idea in your head that the Philippines is some sort of utopia that only breeds perfect spouses? YOU did (probably with some ill-advised YouTube info), and you paid for it.

  78. I honestly think you Filipinas date white guys for another reason:

    – White washed. I’m not filipino but I assume Filipinas are attracted to white and have grown up with a media that shows white as the top of the race and beauty charts or something. Reason why is because there has to be a reason why Filipinas are racist when it comes to dating — being only open to dating white men over any other race including their own.

    You can make the claims “not all of us” but when the ratio is that high then the “smaller %” who are open to non white (or sorta white looking) men are of low significance.

    In fact, go to LA, NYC, UK, Dubai, or whereever.. find 20 filipinas who are in a relationship. If you manage to get atleast 1 who is dating a non white/filipino male (who she met outside of the philippines) then you’ve just found something rarer than a shooting star.

  79. Yeah for you two! I am happy y’all are happy. Too many nosy people and haters out there. You wrote in the intro “I’m not lucky cuz I’m with a white man ” and I had to laugh a bit because I just got thru reading Asian-American Sexual Politics by Rosalind S. Chou and after reading that I feel a sort of outrage for Asian women who are with white men who exploit them so I think it is funny that some in your culture would find you licky to have a white man. After reading that book, the parts about exploitation by white men, it leaves a bad feeling.

    I can tell you and your man are equals and travelers and have a lot in common-ENJOY!

    I am “white” but married to a Mexican-American and have had a few people assume he loves rap because he is Hispanic, which is hilarious because he does not, I do.

  80. That is so true Ma’am Kach.

    I don’t have any experience of being into relationship with a foreigner but all of what you said was true.
    I have observed that, that is the case on some Filipinas. They get judged as if they know the stories behind.
    Filipina dating a foreigner is being seen like what you said in your article. You will get all the tsismosa’s looks, hahaha. Like ,, “Habol lang niyan, ganito, ganyan”.. Maybe so iba, but not all.

    Your article gives comfort for those Filipinas who experienced those misconceptions.
    I also thought one time of having a relationship with a foreigner but sometimes may mga factors na pumipigil sa akin. I met an African online not very long but we’re friends and decided to take it slow. He’s really kind and we share a lot of interests that’s why we have a lot to talk. If things really go well with him, why not?? He will be my first boyfriend if ever.. hahaah 🙂 🙂 But if not, That’s fine also. 🙂

    I saw your article and got curious and I think you really point out a lot of facts that’s why I really love it
    Thank you Ma’am Kach.. 🙂 🙂
    I’ve got the positive vibe your bringing..

  81. How on earth can all of you “judges” and “psychologists” know how the mind of approximately 53 million woman works?? As in all cultures and races and societies you have “golddiggers”, genuine people, honest people, liers, fakers, cheaters and faithfull people
    As i read the most offenders here, you went to search for someone via a website, in clubs, on the streets, etc.
    Tell me how you can be sure of someone if she/he is searching someone abroad?
    I agree a lot of Filipinos see western – white – people as a walking bank. But it’s up to you if you want this image to be kept or not. A people who have to save and struggle to even travel to another island to visit family can think easily that someone who travels thousands of kilometers just to have a relaxing time swims in money. I explained to the family how things work here in Europe and they were very surprised. My wife sends money, of her own salary, to her family on holidays and birthdays. She is the first to get mad at them if they dare to ask financial support. I really believe she loves me and i love her, i respect her for who she is and what she stands for as an equal of me. We are really happy together and i hope this will last. If it goes wrong, it is the mistake of two people who lost each other out of sight, just as it happens – a lot – with western couples. Be happy with the great time you have/had together and keep your poison for yourselves please.

  82. I don’t know why I got here but it seems the topic interest me. I am a native Filipino man and I will tell you about my thoughts. Most negative comments here are true. There are tons of women that are gold diggers and even us Pinoys are victim. Take note that Pinoy is a term for Filipino man and Pinay is for Filipino women.

    There are also plenty of Pinays that are caring, faithful, loving, loyal and great at household chores. Most loyal Pinays are martyr even if they are being physically hurt or haven’t treated nice but they will still love you. I know a lot of them. You just need to look.

    I had a lot of Pinay friends and relationships that’s why I know their attitude and how to get them. This is my advice for all foreigner men who wants to marry our women and to have a successful and happy marriage. Please read carefully.

    1) Know her better. Ask about her education. Most undergrad Pinay like the ones that didn’t graduate in college will likely use you as an ATM. The reason is that, it’s hard to find a decent paying job here. It is worst if you are undergrad. So most likely they will find income somewhere else.

    2) Do not attempt or be extra careful to marry someone you met at the club. Chances are they are hookers or if not, they just want a sugar daddy to support their vices doing clubbing, adventure and family expenses.

    3) Ask about their family. Ask about their parent’s job and education. If they will say their parents are irresponsible and they are financially down or you found out they are indeed financially down and not doing enough effort to solve it then git rid of her immediately unless you want to be a hero.

    4) Do not attempt to marry easy girl like you had a casual encounter in within a few days of meeting. A genuine Pinay keeper is hard to get and will always make a way to get rid of you even if she likes you. You have to prove your worth in order for her to submit.

    5) Tell her and be honest with her from the start that you have that kind of income. The kind of income that is rich in Philippines and just average in US. Filipinos made an impression that you are rich because you’re a foreigner. Pinays like vocal men that is open and told him everything before hand.

    6) Don’t give her money. Pinays wants you to pay everything like food and rent. It’s fine because you are sharing with her but if she will ask for money because her parents needs it then say no. Tell her there’s a problem in your bank account that forbids you to withdraw a certain amount of cash. Just make a silly lie and it will 100% work. Trust me.

    7) This is the most important advice. Be ROMANTIC! Be caring and showy of love. You know we Filipinos likes niche, drama and romance. If you’re not that kind of guy then you cannot handle our girls. Let’s say you already have a goldigger Pinay with you. You could still convert her to be a good woman if you are being romantic and very good at sex. You are lucky for our women also interest you because of your equipment but that is not enough. Most Pinays are not comfortable with large dicks. They are usually happy with your mouth skills alone. Trust me. I have small dick but pinays love me.

    There are plenty of advice it’s too long. I just pointed the most important things you need to know. Good luck.

    1. Thank you very good useful information , also only few may have BF already and they dope foreigner husband when they get to husband country then divorced and bring Filipino BF and marry him. But not all.

    2. Vincent, you really have given me encouragement. I have had concerns since reading a lot of negative comments from certain foreigners who claim to have had a barrage of experienced with the Philippine culture. As a single foreigner, I feel I have what it takes to attract a beautiful intelligent pinay to marry. Let me be clear, I plan to get involve with a filipina is for all the right reason. I’m not looking someone who spend most of their life at night clubs, prostituting or any as such. Rather, someone who’s willing to spend their life with an enterprising partner willing to provide them with a good life. Because of your comments, I now have a different view of what to expect why searching for the ideal lady in the Philippine. Thanks!

  83. There appears to be a lot of bitterness from a few western men on this site who are now trying to generalize their issues as pertaining to all Filipinas. I am married for 13 years to a lovely Filipina woman. We have one child together. We seldom fight, we both work and enjoy each other’s company. To any newbies on this site please ignore the comments from the old, bitter men on this site. It is very degrading and offensive to see such comments as “all Filipinas are whores, sex addicts, goldiggers” Etc. yes there are a few bad apples out there but that is the exception not the rule. A lot of the guys complaining here cannot get women in their own country so it is no wonder when their Filipina wife or gf dumps them. Salamat from a happy 50yo US citizen happily married. PS : to all the haters on this site “piss off” and take your negativity elsewhere.

    1. No American in his right mind says “piss off,” so I’m willing to bet you’re actually one of those homely, toothless Brits. Sorry to burst your bubble, mate, but I have it on extremely good authority that the vast majority of Filipinas are nothing but soulless, money-grubbing pieces of sh#t. And, no, I’m not some bitter, old, Western man.

    2. Good on you CMorgan. There are so many stereotypes noted on this site it’s almost unbelievable. These will mostly be from people who are making assumptions and believe that they ‘know’, with no first hand experience (Chrisk is a good example…’…I have it on good..(blah, blah, blah)’. Clearly not many brain cells there. Can only speak for myself, but my Filipina Mrs of 8 years works herself into the ground to help her immediate family have a better life and I begrudge none of it. When I go there and see what little they have and how welcoming and generous they all are with that little, it puts things in perspective for me, and all of us, no matter where we come from, would want to do something to make their lives better. The trick is in how you do it….not too much, too often, and it always needs to be justified. Any guy who ends up with a ‘gold-digger’ is simply a poor judge of character. They stand out a mile and the signs are obvious.

  84. some people cannot stop cheating guys, it is an addiction. I was in love with a freak, we got married and i still didn’t suspect there were other women in his life. Always protective of his devices too that one. I am not the type to go all haywire but i used my connect to get someone that helped get access to his phone and laptop whose mail is rootgatehacksAT tutanota dot com I also got his dating site accounts and i was so devastated. I had to leave him beacuse i can always do better than that

    1. I find myself on this site out of curiosity. You see, I’m an African American; this means I lack the “magic white skin”. However, a few days ago I joined an international dating site called InternationalCupid. As a black man I knew I would draw interest from Germany, UK and Australia. To my surprise, I have been bombarded by filipinas mostly in the late 20s to mid 30s age range (I’m 48 by the way). I find it odd that that these women would consider my dark skin when the magic-white is so high in demand. I cant help but feel there is an angle or window of opportunity being sought. When I look at the profile of these women it’s mostly single mothers with multiple children working as domestic helpers. Then again, I have received a few hits with BS degrees working as nurses or self employed. Although it may sound prude, I ask each of these women what are their interest in me, and they all seem to say the “right” thing. By all accounts, I consider myself to be equal to my magic skin counterparts. I’m retired military, college educated, and currently work as a GS11 contract specialist for the US Military. This means i negotiate multi-million dollar contracts for goods and services with vendors/merchants on behalf of the US Navy. Therefore, any woman i choose should also be professional. I’m not getting a lot of that with the filipinas but the few who are professional…I cant help but wonder why they aren’t considering the magic white, and rather choose me. What’s the angle? It lead me here.

      1. It is simple. I have been to the Philippines and the people work so hard to survive there. I have heard stories of doctors coming to the USA and working as nurses because they make a better living here. Also their children’s opportunity here is far better than in the Philippines. Girls who in the Philippines who are nurses have salaries that are probably equivalent to working a minimum wage job here. If you are a retiree and have a $1000 retirement check you can live a whole lot better in the Philippines. The families in the Philippines are more like the families of people born here before 1945. They are closer to one another because they know how much they need each other. If you are interested in a Filipina bride I am sure you would be happy with one. Just be aware if you don’t treat them right they will divorce you just like the American girl. Filipino people are generally very fun hard working people. Just my 2 cents

  85. Good stuff. Too often Filipinas are ‘marked’ as gold diggers or what-have-you, or at the very best, ‘practical-minded’ for choosing a wealthy foreign husband. Or worse, if any white guy is visiting in Manila or elsewhere in the archipelago they think he’s there for a sex tour.

    I’m married to a woman from the Philippines for nearly 36 years, as happy and occasionally unhappy as any couple married might be, and have no regrets.

  86. Hello! Some very good – albeit general insights into Filipino women and culture. I am currently writing a book about my 10-year pinay-mission, in finding a TRUE Filipina. I have had so many bad experiences, encountered many lies. However, I know it is only a small percentage of pinays who are mischievous and dishonest. I am writing my book as I am sick of Westerners with little good to say about Filipinas. Lack of compassion, empathy, and education are the result of this, so I want to help inform others that Filipinas ARE, in fact, the best women ever created. I also have a lot of Pilipino art on my instagram (blaisebullwits). God bless you and Salamat for sharing this. – Blaise

  87. Hi all….I am Inai…half chinese half pinay….and i am 40 years old and i am married with a german guy …his age is 60 and he is retired……I am not looking for his money or his passport….I still hold my filipino passport…..i have worked in taiwan as a caregiver for old people and my husband working in asia too….so we meet,we spend time together and we falling in love for each other and at last we got married in Hongkong for 7 years ago…..2 years later we moved to germany and I work here as before in asia …..So I am a modern and indipendent wife and we share everything ….even our money and we live like the most of all the german couples here…..one point is true…..Iam crazy for his white skin,blond hair and the green eyes….but thats not all….he is tall and older than me so I feel secure and safe with him and he is a serious and loving husband…..before in taiwan i was engaged with a filipino guy ….the wedding are already planned….But he must taste a another girl …also a filipina…..doesnt matter what is the relationship….and thats a big point for me to married that german guy….I can trust him and his promises and words….he never lie to me about his feelings or emotions…..A Foreigner give you the feeling you are a Poccahontas (asian princess) even we are an modern couple he surprise me and carry me on his hands…..the only one thing a pinoy husband surprise you is to tell you that he has loose his money during gambling in the pussycat bar …LOL sorry….So its not only the apperance from the western guys…its her attitude….aspecially if their are a little bit older….And supporting my family….I do it with my income and he support my nice to became a nurse…but it was his own choice to do it….we have no kids actually…..our decission as a couple…..Best regards from Germany Inai and Peter

  88. Hi, Kach! It was nice getting across your article. I’ve been trying to read as much as I can about dating or marrying a foreigner. And, mind you, I was shocked by most of the comments here, and kind of scared and confused me more. 🙂

    I’ve met someone from UK online and it was my first time to “chat” with a stranger. I was uncomfortable of this so-called online dating, so I blocked him and deleted my account after less than a week on chat. However, he was able to find a way to find me, and get in touch with me, and was able to convince me to give it a chance. We’ve been in touch for months now, and is soon coming here in the Philippines, and is expecting marriage.
    Unlike the picture of a Filipina that is being depicted by a lot of people here, I am in a totally different angle:

    Scared/Worried/Hesitant – I am so scared that this man declaring love for me is not genuine, that I am just being fooled big-time, that he is just playing around, and that everything is just too good to be true, that things are going too fast. Since I started doing a research online, and read all these negative generalization on Filipinas, I’ve been worried, and scared that my man might actually believe all these, and could already have doubts already, which could affect whatever good we have right now. My hesitation also includes getting into a something that would fail eventually because we didn’t go to the usual process of getting to know each other. And a whole lot more and when shared to him, he only told me that I should stop reading other people’s comments, or listening from anyone because whatever we have is basically just between us, and that people have no business getting into others’ business – that I should just trust him and what we have, and that we’ll take one step at a time. He had been insisting for marriage as soon as he comes, but I insisted on spending more time first to be able to get to know each other better – and to expose each other on our respective life, cultures, etc.

    So, you see, for those who readily make assumptions, not all Filipinas are too eager to marry a foreigner, most especially for money. Most of us are still praying for someone who would just be genuine and love us wholeheartedly – someone who’ll be our equal, a partner, who’ll be faithful and loyal, who’ll be cherish us the way we deserve to be treated. Being able to provide for us financially would just be a bonus. Most of us are independent and hardworking, and are ready to help our man in that area. In the first place, marriage for most of us, is through thick and thin.

    I feel for those who had been fooled and treated badly by fellow Filipinas, but some are right, maybe you just looked at the wrong places, or, maybe some didn’t also honor their part. We’ll really never know the truth because these are just between couples and there are always two sides in a story.

    I’m genuinely happy for those who had find their love with fellow Filipinas. I know a lot who have been happily married for years. Like in any other group or race, there are successful and failed relationships/marriages. It’s not because one got himself a poor dirt Filipina whore, or a scammer. It always takes two to tango.

    As for myself, I will be giving mine a chance. I will be open-minded. Whatever feedbacks I am getting will serve as lessons. Thanks, everyone, for all the comments! They’ve helped me in a lot of ways. 🙂

    By the way, my man and I are of the same age (41), both single, never been married, no kids. We are both well-educated, well-traveled and gainfully employed. My family may not be rich, but we take pride in being independent, hardworking and honest people. All I prayed for is for a Somebody (Depeche Mode), not necessarily a foreigner, but my God has His own ways of responding to one’s prayers.

    God bless, everyone!

    1. Thanks Sherell, this is exactly what had happened to me recently what I have been through as you described. My pinay suddenly exploded and cut off our chat relation after just a few days knowing each other. She cited she is scared and confused and reasoned that it was too fast to decide for marriage when we were still stranger to each other. We regretted what we have done and asked forgiveness. I think I will give her another try as I know she is sincere in her talk after introducing her family background. I should be very careful this time. I am from a neighboring country of the Philipine and of Asian origin. To me. it is totally wrong to generalise that all pinays behave in the same way as I read many negative comments about them written in other places.

  89. Let’s all get back to the topic shall we?
    I’m a Filipina and dating a foreigner. Specifically, a Korean man. (Asian guy, not Western but has white skin — who cares?)
    Like Kach said, not all Filipina wants money from his foreigner boyfriend. I feel sad reading comments here thinking that most Filipinas are only after the Visa and money. That’s so unfair and I feel misjudged. Before I met my bf, I have also been in different countries (with visa). I earn and save my own money to be able to travel. And mind you, I pack my stuff with additional baggage fees and I don’t mind paying an extra amount since I know I am spending my own hard-earned money.
    My boyfriend and I travels, too. And just like Kach and Jon, we SHARE! Since we are in an LDR, the only way to see each other is either visit each others’ countries or meet at the airport of another country. Yes, we pay for our own. I never asked my bf to pay for my expenses even at times he insists. I always remind him that if I have to pay something for myself, he needs to let me pay for it. And in our travels, we always make sure that we have equally divided our expenses so there will be no fighting who pays for this and that. Relationship works in 2 ways not just one way.

    To cut things short, it would be nice if you don’t generalize Filipina. Like in any country, women and even men differ from one another. We all have our own reasons, whether it’s love for money, love for visa or simply for the Love of Love. Cheers everyone!

  90. The article is NOT the truth at all. I actually doubt this person is a real person. However, in the first instance the AVERAGE wage per MONTH in Manila is PP10,000.00 thats like NOT much in $$$$ so yes they do get into a relationship purely for money: 2: NO they cant just go any where with their passports, there’s a little thing called visas, and the first world countries are rather strict on the conditions they impose on Philippine women in particular. This is because if the girl marries and she then LEAVES the marriage and claims the guy committed DOMESTIC VIOLENCE against her, she is not sent back at all, but given residential status, including an income she doesnt have to work for ( courtesy of the Government) she is given a card for medical services for free and many other things. So bollocks to the concept of what the article attempts top portray, it just aint the way it really is.

    1. I’m so sorry if you feel that way about (us) Filipinas. You are entitled to your own opinion. I respect that. But just a quick unsolicited statements…
      1. Not because we earn little than yours doesn’t mean we can’t afford to pay for our own expenses. We have our way of saving money when we really want something. And we don’t need foreign bfs to buy us what we want. There are tons of SINGLE women (and women in relationship) who can afford this and that. So don’t belittle us. And just so you know, in surveys, there are more successful women in the Philippines than men. Gets paid higher than men, too. So yes, we can pay for ourselves. Thank you.
      2. Indeed, we have limited places to go with our passport because most countries requires visa. Why so worked-up with visas anyway? In case you don’t know, we can travel to 66 countries and territories, ranking the Philippine passport 72nd in terms of travel freedom (tied with a passport from Tunisia) according to the Henley Passport Index. So what if we want to go to a country with visa? Did it killed you or were you the one who took time to apply for it? Whether we go to a country with/without a visa, it’s none of your concern. We travel because we want to and we can afford it because we worked to earn it. We all need a little vacation from time to time.
      3. Regarding domestic violence… that’s a different story. You don’t know what happened in a relationship to end up in a bad spot. Filipinas generally have long patience but we know how to fight back when we are being stepped on. And I think “one of the reasons” why it ends up in physical argument is because “some foreign men” belittles what his woman can do or always instill to his partner that she is nothing without him. In time, the woman gets fed-up and starts to fight back. (Well, I am not here to judge a relationship… so I’m leaving my case here).

      I have tons of Filipina friends who are married to foreigners and others got divorced. I, for one is in a relationship with a foreigner. But money or greed of visa never crossed my mind. I enjoy being in a relationship and I am happy with how we run things considering that we are in an LDR. You can’t generalize Filipina. And if you ever experienced something bad with a Filipina, my apologies in behalf of my fellow Filipinas. I hope you find a good partner who can show you real relationship.

      1. I would like a share a my experiences and thus my point of view on this matter.

        I think I belong to the unlucky group (really), but of course something positive came out of my experience in my own life’s trajectory. Just to give it a little context, I’m from an Asian. I look Asian but still distinctly foreign.

        My then-girlfriend and I met in an Asian country when she was an OFW. She is a dancer and works in a night club. Unfortunately, as much as I wouldn’t like to say an occupation and define a person, I later learnt that the way they learnt to earn money, is to manipulate and use people. Always remember that if she can do this to anyone, she can do this to you.

        I was very much all positive (with a hint of naivety) when I knew that she could dance (it’s a talent, right?), but all protective when I know about her work. It is also about the way she branded it, but I knew that it’s not exactly a matter of damsel in distress. I was all cognitive dissonant.

        How we met is a peculiar incident. It is not in a club. It just happened. Very easy to romanticise it, but I would cut the story short.

        Fast forward to LDR and video calls, all the sob stories that guys are sharing here wouldn’t be unfamiliar to me. Sometimes could be fluke and other times true, but I’m not sure now. Back then I had to stay level-headed as much as I can, because the greater part of me doesn’t believe that with easy money, the nature of a relationship would be in question and possibly alter.

        Trust is not solid, but I was still very much in love. I bet she saw my kindness, but I really wasn’t hoping that she will end up exploiting it.

        Eventually I stayed with her in the Philippines for a period of time. Not a good experience but I will not go into details. The ending of the relationship could have exposed me to danger and killed me in the process. If I ever made it safe I would really never return to this place.

        However, what changed later on was the support I had from the a few friends I made in the Philippines. One of them is a girl, and so from her I learnt and understood that “not all Filipina are the same”. We are just friends, but she demonstrated great virtues, and her friends who does not necessarily fall into the scammer strata.

        At least from my first-hand experience that is. Because even my other Filipino friends are telling me that they are the same, it just takes time to reveal.

        Very dark isn’t it? My takeaway would be a few things which I agree on:

        It is the kind of people one is attracting that defines the experience of a Filipina. From a statistical point of view on general population, it is not optimistic in probability in meeting one that is like, more similar to my principles and values which are loyalty, faithful and integrity (I avoid representing other guys). You need to know what you are going in for, and how to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally. These are concepts I wish I had better prepare myself before entering the country. I don’t think it’s as simple as taking hearsay to be the truth, because it is not necessarily what each individual experiences (or just yet).

        If you are looking for love, don’t go there. If you are looking to pay for something, whatever it is, go ahead. If you think true love is happening to you, think twice. Prepare and limit the damage. If you’re strong in finances and know how to compartmentalise (don’t show your money), I think that will keep you safe. I suppose when you know love is true, you will know for it only empowers you e.g. creating an interesting article here for dialogue, not drain you e.g. $, mental and emotional energy questioning.

        Because of my positive experience post-breakup, it made me more curious and understanding towards the Philippines. I can learn to appreciate the country and her people from a distant point of view, but not passionately for now because of how hurt I was (fresh wound).

  91. Here is one I think should be mentioned, and I can attest to it first hand as I lived in the Philippines and traveled to many parts. Filipinas love white skin. There is not a store that doesn’t carry a variety of whitening cream. To coincide with this, the majority of Pinays I have met love white men. And if you also have light eyes and average to above average height, you are the trifecta!

    Interestingly, many Filipinas do not know where the history began with the quest for white skin. In older times, in many Asian countries, such as China (who many Filipinos act subservient to, but that’s another story), if you worked in the fields as a laborer you had darker skin and those of hierarchy had white skin as they did not have to labor. So, it started as a sign of class. Regardless, it is still a very prevalent attraction in the Philippines today.

    1. I was just wondering if someone wanted to get a girl from the phillipines a visa to move to england how would they go about doing it? do they really have to stay there for 30 days? any advice would be great. my friend wants to do it but i think its a bad idea.

      1. many factors would be at play

        your freind would have to prove he is fiancially stable and have money in the bank to prove this to support her, she is not entitled to ever receive benefits

        they would take into account the age difference and how long they have been together, bigger age gap between them is usually seen as the filipina only being with the bloke for for her benefit

        they would also look at what education level and savings she has , if she is just a poor farm girl with no education that would instantly set off a red light

        the uk like most western countries is now is clamping down on immigration , especially for people from non western countries or the european union…phillipines is seen as a high risk country and their women do not have the best reputations when it involves marrying men just to immigrate to a country where the grass is greener

        soallinall the major factor wouldbe the mans ability to support the woman who is moving there , the way it is worked out is average cost of living , eg..if it costs 400quid a week on average to live he would need to prove he has 400to support her , times that by per week , so just or her to stay a year he needs to prove he has 400 a week times 52weeks which = 20,800 quid in the bank for her to be there a year

        if he has no savings its very very highly unlikelyy she would get issued a visa

        just having a job does not count for much…he needs savings in the bank to show he can support her, afterall if he lost his job how does he support her? thats why savings are required

        1. What if the man will be 88 in 3 months, and the Phillipina is 63? She can’t speak English so they haven’t even spoken on the phone yet, but say they love each other and plan to marry when he gets there in Nov. He doesn’t own his home (he gave all property and house to his 6 kids). She got mad over that and asked what would be left for her? (red flag right there for me!) I am this man’s daughter and am having a hard time accepting his decision to move there until she can get a visa to come to the states. I question her intentions. And what if he dies over there? How do we get his body or ashes back if he has taken kids off his life insurance as beneficiaries and put her as beneficiary? We already have a headstone here with his name on it by my mom’s name. His cremation is already paid for here. Ugh…

    2. wht you say as a sign of class is very true

      i have worked for the last 8 years here in bgc for a multi national company doing structural engineering,working on many different projects and i can attest to the fact that all of my filipino/filipina colleagues are mesztisa they are light skinned and have very heavily spanish influenced bloodlines.

      i am yet to even meet a moreno/morena in a high position or employed at any company that i have had to deal with apart from them being menial manual labourers or cleaning staff..

      i guess thats why most want light skin as the most affluent people in filipino society are mesztisa andthe mesztisa have more wealth and better education levels from my observation

      also when you look on tv you are hard pressed to find any morena/morenos at all,they are not in advertisments nor are they in any tv shows unless they are being stereotypically portrayed as labourers or cleaners

  92. OP you are joking about the phillipines visa getting you into any country, so you are not telling the truth at all

    lol…63 countries only visa free

    not 1 western country allows you to travell visa free as your citezens are flagged as high risk

    usa,canada,uk,european union,australia,nz and many other westernized countries make obtaining visas hard for the citezens of phillipines..

    also its not uncommen for filipinos to be denied entry by immigration upon arrival …. just because a person obtained the tourist visa , they can still be denied entry which happens all of the time

  93. If you are going to the Philippines to look for a woman, with no knowledge of the language or customs, your plan is already flawed, and most likely doomed to failure. If you are quite old (60+) even more so.
    My first GF was a, la Filipina. In those days we spoke Spanish. Like a lot of Aussies I am thinking of retiring to SE Asia, to that end I am learning Tagalog. Some of my friends are in Thailand, But Thai is too difficult for us falangs. (Ten different tones!)
    If you are retired, get to know your local community, and immerse yourself in local affairs, and don’t hang out with other expats too much. Open yourself up to new experiences, enjoy the cultural differences and have fun. BTW don’t try to be the “BOSS”, just be isang tao, no more no less.
    When aking kerido and I were Bf and Gf we really enjoyed or cultural differences. One night after dinner she cooked me, I put ice-cream and honey on a bowl of rice. She looked at it, and said in horror. “You Australians do strange things,” I replied. “You think that is strange?” Wrestled her to the floor, pulled most of her clothes off, tipped it over her tummy, and slurped it off, with her squeaking, squealing, and giggling. Which of course, led to an hilarious lovemaking session. Who said, It’s the most fun you can have “without” laughing? The only problem we had, was that I was rather well endowed, and she was so little, which meant, I had to be so very careful with her. She told me that had she known, she would have run a mile, unfortunate]y for her, by the time she found out, we were totally committed to each other. (madly in love if you will) She reckoned that she loved me even more, for my care and attention to her. For mine I loved everything about her, she was so beautiful , and so delicious, and we just plain got along so well. Of course we were very young, but my advice is, open yourself up to new experiences, enjoy your cultural differences, and above all, have fun.

    filipinas has made so many naughty groups. They are posting their nude photos there and asking for sex. Sex is like a child play to them and boys are like toys. They try to seduce other country men also. They do it for their pleasure as well as money also. So there are many prostitutes in this country.
    There are many filipinas who make foreigners as their friends for money. They create false sad stories about them and somehow make them believe it. Then use this foreigner like a free loan. If they don’t need money anymore, they block this foreigner. Lot of scammers in philipines. Already foreign boys have experienced this and they know it’s really happening.
    There are many filipinas who already have boyfriend or husband but still trying to find a lover online for a secret relationship.This playgirls act so careful to not get caught by anyone. They mostly prefer to date rich foreigners who would send them money and they can enjoy their life however they want. They keep their identity safe by not letting his online lover to meet her family, friends, etc. Because of this, filipinas can’t be trusted.
    Next, filipinas can’t stay in relationship for a long time because their feelings change with time. They get bored of their partner and leave them after few months or years. Then they start to search for new partner and say that its their boyfriend’s fault. They don’t take blame on themselves. Searching a new partner is like trying something new for them and they like it. So there are many single moms there.They dont take marriage life seriously. They just live their life in the way they want and ignoring the fact that they are doing it wrong. More than 95% of them have some sort of mental health issues

    REASONS: 1)* Most Filipinas marry foreigner for money. It’s not real love for her husband. It’s love for his riches. They will spend time with him just so that they can get money to enjoy life and help family. Filipina wife and her families will keep asking money from foreigner husband and treat him as free money lender. Even if you help them 9 times and refuse to send money just once, then they will call you bad and start using bad words. After few months or years of marriage, they will ask for divorce and that time will demand for huge amount of money and properties of husband. So this is huge loss for the foreigner and they regret it later about marrying Filipina.
    2) Some Filipinas especially educated ones are marrying foreigners for citizenship. In this case, she will pick any men even if she don’t like his attitude. Once she is citizen of your country, they are ready to leave their husband and then find another man from philipines or that country. So in this case, foreigner is just being used for achieving her dream.
    3)* They are not serious about relationship. Most of them are dating just for fun. So after a few months or years, they start saying that their feelings change and they leave. They can’t stay with 1 men forever. When they leave, it will be in harsh way becoz they are selfish and won’t care about your feelings. Moreover they will blame the men for breakup. Even if her family and friends know that it’s her fault, they will still support her and then they will spread out that her ex-bf was bad. So this is like a double murder to the boyfriend who is so innocent. You will find lot of Filipinas as single moms and when asked for the reason, they will say that they breakup becoz their ex-bf was cheater or irresponsible as father. Some of them maybe true but sometimes it is women’s fault also but they don’t want to admit their mistake. So don’t give full trust on Filipina women and her friends too.
    4) Please don’t expect them to be loyal to you. There are some cases where Filipina girlfriend or wife cheats her bf or husband. When their truth is revealed, they still don’t admit it and instead they will act rude to us and start assaulting. Already there are some cases where it’s found that they sleep with other men even while having husband and then when they get pregnant, they deny the fact that the child about to be born is from that other men.
    5) Our culture is different from Filipinas. It’s difficult to adjust with each other when living together. Then they have to adjust with other family members also which is another difficult task. It takes long time to learn and adjust but in most cases, the couples give up and then divorce. In philipines, they are taught to give priority to family first. So if her family tells her to leave the husband, she will do it and go back to her family. Their husband is never their first priority and it shows that they don’t really love him.
    6) Some Filipina women are perverts. So they will want to try many different men for sex. They do it for money and pleasure. Then they ask for dick sizes, nudes in our messages box and also they want sex video call. But in public, they are acting decent and so innocent. They become single moms and say that they are proud of it. Philipines is well known place for sex tourism. So that’s why some perverted boys from other countries don’t respect Filipina women.
    7) In online dating, Filipinas ask foreigners for money and they give several reasons like “I want to buy cellphone so that we can talk everyday”, “family member is hospitalized and need to pay hospital bills”, “need to pay school fees”, etc. or they will create a false story to make you believe them and then after getting money, they will either block him or try to get more money from him next time. They will date you secretly or from her other/fake account so that her real boyfriend or husband and people don’t know about this fake relationship. They do this scamming for money and also are players.
    8 ) Some Filipinas are now saying that they search for old men to date. It’s becoz they want to be queen of his family. It’s very obvious that this old men will die soon after few years and then she can become owner of his property. Also it’s easier to cheat old men and date some young guy secretly. After this old men is dead, she is rich and can get to do whatever she want with his riches. So this old men need to be wise and not fall into Filipina’s dirty tricks.
    9) They may say that they are God fearing and religious but they don’t even know Bible well and are thinking that whatever they do is right and acceptable by God while doing so much sin. They don’t actually love their partner in real. It’s just acting or INFATUATION. Filipinas don’t take marriage life seriously. They make so many promises to their lover but break it so easily because they are not serious about it

  95. Philipinas can’t get to just any country. They can’t get an Australian Tourist visa without great difficulty.

    1. exactly..the country is classed as high risk , immigration sees no difference between philipines and a country like nigeria or pakistan..etc..

      i have a close freind who works for immigration in sydney who told me so… they must have financial security before even obtaining a tourist visa to oz..

      but even after proving all of this they can be turned around on arrival and denied entry by immigration

      also phillipines can only enter 63 countries world wide visa free which is very low amount due to many countries aknowledging they are very high riskto overstay or work illegallyetc

      and none of the visa free countries they can enter are classed as 1st world nations….

      aus immigration does not need to have a reason to deny entry, and it happens all the time to filipinos upon arrival

    2. Actually, that’s not true. Some of this is a beat up by migration agents. Tourist visas are a case by case basis. Proof of a genuine relationship and evidence that the sponsored is not a flight risk is usually all that is needed – added of course is the sponsor’s ability to pay for the upkeep of the sponsored in Australia. I sponsored my future wife for two tourist visas and then a third one whilst married. She has her permanent residency now. For all those people who read these alarmist posts, calm down. If you are worried see a reputable migration agent. I suggest someone who actually has a degree in migration law and simply not a migration agent.

    3. A friend of mine went to Australia on a tourist visa and her trip was sponsored by her sister who lives there. Everything went smoothly.

  96. I fell hook line and sinker. I ended up moving from Florida to Bataan Philippines to meet a girl I met on Facebook back in 2010. I has just got out of the Army in 2009 after a year or so I decided to travel, and had already been to the Philippines on leave when stationed in S. Korea back in the late 90s. It was an experience to say the least but I expected as much. The Philippines is a corrupt, dirty, polluted, and Religiously fanatic country of hypocrisy. I have since married the woman I met back in 2013 while living there. She was sweet, beautiful, loving, and it seemed like my soulmate had finally been found. I loved her wholeheartedly, and unconditionally, and we now have a 4 year old Son together. I lived on my Social Security and military Disability while living in the Philippines. The currency exchange value made it to where we lived very very well. Much better than anyone in her Barangay. I didn’t mind helping her family and regularly gave them money for rent, house repairs, even loaned her father, $5000 to totally rebuild their family business. A fish farm that raised crabs, fish, and prawn. About three to four times a year, they’d harvest and make 100k PHP or so, but I noticed not once did they offer one peso in return for my financial help. I just blew it of and figured ,screw it they need it worse than I do, and I still get over 100k php per month from my Social Security alone so why complain. Unfortunately I found out the hard way that the Filipino tradition, and pride are something us foreigners have to learn through experience ,since Filipinos are great actors and scammers. I mean it’s totally acceptable even for the law making politicians to buy votes for 500-1500php handing out cash for votes in her Barangay. So to say the least they are raised corrupt and find no problem with it. I decided I had enough brown outs, mosquitoes, people with SOB stories asking for a loan they will NEVER pay back, and corruption and scamming everywhere. They see you coming, especially a newby your toast. You’ll be charged three times as much for even a tomato at market. It’s imperative you learn to barter by saying ” Mahal NAMAN!” To the vendors, and asking them for “TAWAD” a bargain or discount. They will usually work with you then but still make sure it’s them who come out on top. It comes from living a life of poverty and being desperate. I felt sorry for them all at first, but when I noticed if your not a OFW worker then they pretty much sit around and want their children to support the family. I even saw barefoot toddlers working collecting recycling materials in a landfill. Some neck deep in filth and barefoot, while their parents are at home. Mom playing Marking on the front porch running a gambling house, Dad asleep or half drunk on Imperador going door to door to his neighborhood drinking, eating and more sleeping. Im not saying ALL Filipinos by any means, but at least 80%. I have traveled and lived all over the Philippines and it’s pretty much the same everywhere. I had enough and decided to try to get my wife and son to America now it was time. Since married there I had to petition her with a CR1 visa and since my sins paperwork as an American citizen was already completed by myself, his was much easier but we still had to wait almost 2 years to get them to the
    States. I went home and although disabled went back to work part time to setup a nice house and life for us all. Once her visa was processed they joined me here in Florida and our lives commenced once again. After around 3-4 months my wife’s demeanor totally changed. I thought she might be homesick already but it was deeper. She already made a few comments about how she was so shocked that I’m not wealthy in America, and couldn’t understand how my almost $3000 a mo income still barely paid all our bills. House payment, car payment, utilities, insurance for house and cars, business expenses, capital etc. My normal experience being American. We know the drill and most of us work or live paycheck to paycheck. I noticed she was spending all her time online. I noticed she was sick or whatever every single time I wanted to be intimate. I noticed she was distant, lethargic, sleeping 16 hrs a day, staying up all night online, and I even found the icing on the cake. I picked her phone up and looked through it to find pages still open. Several were singles sites with her saying she’s single and looking for a better life and was living in Florida. It also had several with half nude photos, and a whole photoshoot of her nude on Snapchat. So after going through hell to get her here, spending tens of thousands of dollars since meeting, spending $6000 on plane tickets, visas, and immigration fees, and traveling money, after waiting two years alone and totally loyal to her, this is our life now. She has since then started working with other Filipina and they always disappear for hours on end with one of them. I don’t mind her having friends and told her that, but it’s just another scamming Filipina who played her man too so it’s not good. I have tried to ask her to get help and change for our kid. She told me right in front of him. I never wanted to be a mother or be married to you, you both ruined my life and my freedom. She kept complaining about her abdominal pain for months as well and always refused to spend even one dollar on her health. She always demands I pay for everything and she has her $$$ hidden. Even has a private bank account. Lies regularly about $$$, about accounts, about what she spends etc. So I payed for her to go to a gynecologist. The first time in her pathetic life. ” GROSS! ” Anyway, her pap smear came back positive for Clymidia. An STD in which never in my entire life have I had one. I freaked and immediately went to my Dr. They rammed a freaking qtip up my tool like a reamer and put me through two weeks of pissing razor blades afterwards, to tell me I’m negative for ALL STDs. I even had extensive extra testing. All came back negative thank God or I may be in prison right now. This bitch has made my life a living hell, used me, not once says thank you, I love you, or simply held my hand or randomly did anything intimate for almost a year now. My advice to anyone considering marrying a Filipina. Just DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES DO IT. I don’t care if you think your girl is different and you think she loves you. It’s all a scam. The dump truck scam to be exact. Do not fall for anything they say. They will say ANYTHING to get to America or try to drain you financially. Once the $$$ gets low or isn’t what they expect they’ll dump your ass, cheat on you, steal your $$$, and use you up til better comes along. This is almost everyone single case not just some small percentage. Beware of the Filipina scammer. And no matter what they tell you in the Philippines, it will all change drastically unless you shit $$$$. What my wife’s fails to understand is. I may be fooled once but never twice. I’ve accumulated pictures, website information, recorded her saying the marriage was simply a motive of getting to America to find better, recorded her saying she doesn’t want our son, and have medical records showing I never had any STD ever, and she is now a Chlamydia carrier. I have already retained an attorney, and I’m about to slam dunk this chick like never before. My attorney is a woman and she is livid. We have already formally started a request to revoke her green card and visa, and have her deported on the grounds of a bogus marriage and lies during her initial Embassy interview. Under no circumstances trust a Filipina. You will be burned and left with a painful learning experience. I say good riddance.

    1. join the club brother i am a vet, got fooled, when the money gets low they are GONE,AFTER TAKING YOU FOR EVERYTHING,but they play a good game,say they love you,rub your feet,BUT BE AWARE THEY ARE IN YOUR WALLET, all the time getting you to send money to there home,want to get married to get your pension and home,THE PUSSY IS JUST NOT WORTH IT,and i am impotent due to a service CONDITION,GOD help the VET that gets trapped, PEACE OUT CAP

  97. the income of professionals in the ppines such as a doctor is of a low standard so your family may be mid to upperclass in phillipines but not in the west ,the wages are pitiful and that person would not be recognisedas a dr in a western country, i know of several cases where drs have relocated and have found themselves doing menial jobs. also the education standard is light years below as a high class university in ppines such as la salle is nowhere near the level of a 2nd or even 3rd tier university in canada,uk us or australia or many other european countries

    a middle class western family would be considered rich in ppines if they were to sell everything and relocate and exchange for piso, also there is none to limited social services or unemployment benefits. if you compare that to commonwealth nations such as uk,australia,nz or canada.. where the average bum on unemployment benefits earns the equivalent of upwards of 600,000 piso a year and thats for being unemployed, no work required

    so there no need to try and state you are basically from a wealthy ppines family, wealthy by philipines standards..yes….but lower working class in most western countries

    while i find your blog informative with good points it seems that you are justifying why you are with a kano.. as long as you and he are both happy thats all that should really matter

  98. Each culture has its own mannerisms and own benefits. It is so wrong to generalize a whole society, like filipinas are gold diggers or nigerians are scammers or americans fat, in all countries are good,bad,scammers,fat etc. Now about the thing that some claim that filipinas are after the money of foreigners, it is a mistake, that happens EVERYWHERE even in rich countries. I am european man and see that also in europe, usa,canada,asia,everywhere…and do not tell me that in usa or europe you haven’t seen rich senior men with american or european girls in age that could be their daughters?…It is all relative, if the only thing you offer to your partner is money and not love or care, then your partner will keep you for your money, simple life rule, whether you are american,european,filipino,african or martian..And for those that believe that if you marry a filipina you have to pay for whole family, it is really up to you if you want that, same as if for example you were french or english and your wife’s or husband’s aunt or grandmother was sick, no one would force you to pay for…So to sum up, filipinas are normal women same as all women on earth they do not graduate from a scam school and from my own experience the average filipina is way more modest and easier to be satisfied than european or american women that are in higher percentage more spoiled…So now that we do not live in 1950’s and you can easily travel all over the world and live wherever you want, many western men or women are fed up by their own countries, and decide to have an asian partner, not because asians are cheap or bad, on the contrary they are taught to be polite from their culture…so a raw truth for example is if you are 35 years old american and you earn 1000$ a month, chances are most american women would spit on you, so why not live with a cute loving asian

  99. I am a Japanese woman who has lived in the Philippines to pursue my master at grad school. The way I see the people in the Philippines, many of Filipinos (both male and females) need money to support their families. Leaving the Philippines, like working abroad or marring a foreigner, is the only way for the poor to escape from poverty. I know that some people say ”it depends on individual if he/she loves your money or your personality” but we have to consider the majority suffering from poverty. As far as I have heard and seen, the Filipino woman/man who has a good relationship with a foreign partner is either rich or well-educated. My ex bf was a Filipino, and he was really greedy for my money. Don’t get me wrong, I am not looking down on the people. I am just telling what I have seen based on my personal experience and observation.

  100. The filipino women only love your money while in the Philippines cos you seem richer than you truly may be. If you head back to your own country with her she’ll grow accustomed to your home country’s living standards and soon she will replace you with a richer countrymate of yours. So degenerate are the filipinos living overseas and they always socialize among each other and the infection of gold diggerism spreads among other filipinos in the host country like a wildfire as they keep comparing each other’s husbands. I’ve had to witness than here because most filipinos in the group have been divorced from the person they initially met. You’re just being used as a gateway to a richer lifestyle. There is no loyalty in this world. Money and it’s complications has corrupted almost everyone and there will be constant fights about money with a filipina. Yes, they may start off sweet, but it’ll never last, unless you’re rich enough to support such a “trophy wife”.

    1. this is very true and all comment similar to this is all true. Its all about the money. marrying a guy as old as your grandpa for love?? big BS!!!! Filipina women and men just needs money coz they are tired of being poor.

  101. i would like to add my experience. good and bad everywhere but few things everyone wants in life and few are must be ignored so depend on which one is more. it is really very hard to find a woman for a happy life specially filipina. and i do not blame them for that as its a part of their lifestyle and culture. but some natures of filipinas are really not acceptable. in simple, greedy for money especially foreigner is a cash machine for her, selfish, jealous 100%, back fighter and much more. but also filipina is a very loving caring responsible faithful hot sexy for her partner only and much more but you will lucky to find such a masterpiece. like that woman will change your life and future amazingly. one more to add most of filipino muslims are not follow the real way of islam so they make a very bad image of islam for the nonmuslims. and most of filipinas who worked abroad converted just for happy life and try to find foreigner and fast to marry got enjoy life and support to her whole family. at the end again good n bad everywhere just be careful to choose filipina. and don’t ever think about the people from pampanga and pangasilan. you will die

  102. It’s so nauseating to see a Pinay girl defending Pinoys like this. You are exactly like those other hoepinays. Not special not different just a feelipino

  103. Anybody else notice that when the Filipinas post on here, they launch into pages and pages of how, oh no, THEY are different, their relationship is based on LOVE, but yes, he’s 30 years older, why should that matter, blahblahblah, telling the story of their entire life ad nauseum. They are with older men because older men percieve that their money can and does buy these girls. A younger man would, and could, be with a younger woman from his own country/race. I saw the comment about men who like foreign girls are geeky or strange and it’s so true for the most part. If they could be with a woman in their country, they would. But older retired guys have that problem,too. And what looks like a small income in the states is dollar signs in these Filipinas eyes and they, on some level, know this. But their egos will make them believe that “of course, she fell in love with me “. ..yeah right ? That and their 70 year old sexual prowess? There’s a sucker born every minute!

    1. There seems a lot of bitterness out there and maybe some jealousy. There are thirteen years between my wife and I. Contrary to the previous post there is no way on earth would ever want a western wife no matter my age. I went through that once before. I had to deal with constant conflict and aggression. Western women tend to become increasingly male as they get older along with all the testosterone. For all the cultural problems I dont find find filipinas second best. They are incredibly more feminine, and loving and gentle. And no it is not easy. They are very difficult at times. They are very proud and will suck you dry for their lazy family because they have been conditioned from a very young age that they can only gain worth through providing for parents and extended family. However, in successful marriages she learns to refocus on the family who needs her – her own children. There is no magical answer to this. It is an ongoing dynamic. The husband has to be generous but firm and show and educate her from the beginning about the realities of living in a Western country. Unfortunately, most people don’t know who they are with until after a few years.

  104. I agree with Kim and Mark Paulsen. The Philippines suck. Backwards, sh-thole country with little to recommend it. Electricity Brownouts all the time, terrible Internet service, water, air and land pollution to the extreme, undriveable roads, terrible health facilities, questionable politics, a lousy educational system, and a society hell bent on keeping the status quo…ah, but Pinoy Pride, right? As for Filipinas, well you all say, ah yes, I married my foreigner for LOVE…his money sure didn’t hurt much either, did it? No matter that he’s not rich by western standards, when most Filipinas have to become OFW’s to live decently. My ex is old, fat, balding…no Filipina would have ever looked twice at him but he’s got retirement money; and suddenly, wow, he’s living with a woman half his age and all her family are calling him Uncle.? Funny how they all disappear as soon as his money for that month is gone. He’s a fool, she’s a whore, and her family are parasites. I doubt you’ll publish this because, wow, Pinoys can stand ANYthing but the truth about their beloved country.

    1. thanks for saying this.. its true.. the average filipina woman is a whore, the average pinoy is a moron. the philippines is a whole and the only reason they make it to the west is because jews run the west and will do anything to destroy white genetics and that meaning importing millions of negros to rape european women and millions of asian whores to distract and occupy the time of caucasian men.. all at the same time israel clenses the middle east of arabs and sets christians to kill muslims and vice versa. the future is a world where jews will run half bred moron slaves.

  105. Congrats to both of you. When I was 17 I met this lovely Filipina lady on the beach at the Gold Coast. She was studying in Australia. Her family was very wealthy. Her dad was Spanish, and his family had had plantations, and businesses, in the Philippines since around 1592. All we wanted to do was to get married and have lots of beautiful mestizo children. But both our families disapproved, and eventually broke us up.
    I am now 73, and will be retiring to the Philippines. At my age i won’t be looking for a lady, just somewhere in the north where I can do a bit of fishing, and surfing, enjoy my memories, and live my life out peacefully. To that end, I am learning Tagalog. In my day we all spoke Spanish. I do observe, Tagalog is very Spanish in form. My lady and I were madly in love with one another, but also enjoyed each other’s personality, and just each other’s company. She was the best lover I have ever had, and was so beautiful I just about melted, when I saw her naked. She felt the same about my body too. She was very demure – no kissing or cuddling in public – but was totally uninhibited as a lover. This worried her a bit, as she was brought up to be a quiet, modest Catholic, Asian lady. She never knew she would be like that with her man. In return, I tried to be as innovative and daring a lover as I knew how to be. I must have done sufficient, for she always told me what a great lover I was. Who knows? I was very fit, and could manage five performances in a night when I needed to, plus I always spent as much time as necessary, to get her ready, before I ever tried to make love to her. That naughty little lady could often manage 8 orgasms or more, in a lovemaking session. We both used to wonder how much different our lives would have been, if he had have married. Her parents sent her to Germany to finish her studies, and I was warned off. She never married, as she told her parents she would, if they broke us up. Later on we kept in touch, but we never were lovers again, for I was married to an Aussie lady. I am sure she would have allowed me to, but I would have lost her respect for cheating. (and my own for myself) She was totally committed to marriage, and told me that even if I beat her, she would still be my wife. I kissed her all over, and assured her i never would. Hell! I could never even spank her even when she begged me to. I was so conscious of her soft little brown bum, and my big hard hands from competition weightlifting. I would rather kiss it, than hit it. Many of her friends who had Caucasian men as lovers, were just as committed to marriage as she was. so i guess that is the norm for la Filipina ladies. Those for whom marriage happened seemed to be happy. I do note, that they were never the married men who spent most of their spare time at the pub, so they must have been happy. Even though times change, I am sure there are still lots of beautiful, loyal, and loving, Filipina ladies available.

    1. Hi , man, i am spanish ,62 , my gf is a filipine mail in o ladyboy. I am really moved by your story, i would like to tell you my story too, because my gf and i were in trouble a lot of times coz discussing about money, and we broke up a lot of times and ,as a miracle ,we are together. But i dont know and where how to do it, here or by e mail, really, if have in mind privacy, nobody is typing the email in a site like this, BUt even morre, i would like to know you, i will trave there this (western Summer).Thanks.

      1. @FER. Beunos nochess caballero, com esta. I’ll see if this works. I have not been able to post here lately.’

        Purrrr….Marum. (El Gato)

        1. @FER. OK. It seems to work.
          Ladyboys sound interesting, but not for me. I would miss the taste of el coño de una dama, too much. That is not to say, that I would have anything against making love to my lady’s bum. Which I did do one night. 😜 She asked me to spank her, (which I could never do) instead I pressed against the part I so desired, and asked.”May I?” She replied. “Puedes disfrutar de cualquier parte de mi cuerpo que quieras. No hay necesidad de preguntar.” So I did. Honestly, Yo estaba tan enojado con el amor y la lujuria por ella lo hice seis veces esa noche. Afterwards I kisse away her tears and had a shower. Thinking; I’ve probably lost her for being such an animal and hurting her so much. As I was almost finished she came to me knelt at my feet, and ella me besó la pija, y dijo lo orgulloso que estaba de mí como su amante. She also said she was going to brag to her girlfriends, about how many times I did it.

          It most certainly was fun….Marum.(El gato que juega del ajedrez)

    2. Nice rap. . One of the problems with most replies is the “generalities” exceeding the actual, factual, stories. People set on their boxed in, narrow visions and fierce prejudices.

      I have at least two good friends in other countries that say they “hate” Philippinos. I can’t understand that at all. Having said that, I do have a concern about what appears to be a total white out to American/ Western Hamburger culture, in the Pines. But the people are delightful and really the only reason I have stayed here myself.
      Also looking to do some surfing and growing vegetables somewhere or other around the place. Politically, socially and culturally, I find my country of origin ruthlessly boring . Its nice here.

    1. I have always thought that Filipinas were the most beautiful, loving and intelligent women on the face of the planet. So if you are a Filipina and you want a good man, here I am. Now to be honest, I am 50+ but fit and semi retired does not mean rich, but I live well. I live in Texas and I really hate sleeping alone. Yes I love sex, but I need Filipina passion for life more than anything. I do not smoke, do drugs, only drink an occasion beer, never when driving, and I always ask my lover for her opinion. Again, I am not going to lie to you and say that I will always agree with you, but I will listen, hear and respect your opinion. Michael

  106. Not all filipinas are as honorable as you are. And for those Filipinas who marry foreigners for convenience, they can’t expect to be respected by the rest of the world. It’s just part of the stigma that they have to live with.

  107. i dont understand why people marry pinay.when ur visiting a brothel(philippines) just enjoy the girl and pay for it,ur not supposed to marry whores(pinay).
    no self respecting man in his right mind marry a pinay.only old men above 70 or handicapped guys should search for pinay.becouse they get a cum bucket+servant.

    1. Your comment is not only way off base but also shows the disgusting human being that you are… I married a Filipina, I am not 70, I am not disabled and we are living happily in the Philippines.. My wife is the most loving, caring woman I have ever met… Much different than North American white women… Sadly you seem to either looking in the wrong place or for the wrong thing… Spending your time in a brothel shows what kind of degenerate you are

      1. indeed,Filipina women are some if the most loving and caring women on the face of the earth, and funny too. They laugh at their problems, would give you their last dollar.They are inclined to build up and not tear down.

        1. They only love your money while in the Philippines cos you seem richer than you truly may be. If you head back to your own country with her she’ll grow accustomed to your home country’s living standards and soon she will replace you with a richer countrymate of yours. So degenerate are the filipinos living overseas and they always socialize among each other and the infection of gold diggerism spreads among other filipinos in the host country like a wildfire as they keep comparing each other’s husbands. I’ve had to witness than here because most filipinos in the group have been divorced from the person they initially met. You’re just being used as a gateway to a richer lifestyle. There is no loyalty in this world. Money and it’s complications has corrupted almost everyone and there will be constant fights about money with a filipina. Yes, they may start off sweet, but it’ll never last, unless you’re rich enough to support such a “trophy wife”.

    2. I once told myself I would never fall in love with a foreigner and one of the reasons was the stereotype and how Filipinas with foreign partners are being looked at. But what can I do? I fell inlove with the most awesome man I have ever met. I am actually older than him (I do look younger though hahaha). Three years difference doesn’t say much at all. I believe no matter how big or wide the age gap is, as long as it’s true love, then all is good. I will soon be moving in with him, and I was in fact hesitating on leaving behind my career here. I was planning to take my PhD before I met him, I have a stable job, I would definitely miss my dogs!!! But I realized that once you meet that one person that makes your life complete, gives you butterflies and “kilig”, makes you happy so easy, and ultimately make you a better version of yourself, then all your priorities in life begin to change. Oh yes! I am so inlove with him! But hey, yes I am a Filipina by race, but above all, I am a woman in love. 🙂

      1. Yeah u are one in a billion. Because most of Filipino girls are not educated, eat cat and dogs and are looking for that white dude that can get them a visa ….or citizenship in another country

    3. I find ur attitude disrespectfull.
      Not all of us fall into ur way of thinking. Stop and thonk of how ir racist view of the pilipino/pilipina. I have been with my wife for over forty years and she worked in a resturant in manila to help her younger siblings.

    4. First of all scumbag I am married to a beautiful Filipino girl who comes from a great moral family in Roxas City and also there are whores as u call them in every country in the world! So as in every other country there are the good and bad ones. You put yourself above several entities of people in your lines. First handicapped folks can’t help they are handicapped as you should know because your brain is extremely handicapped as anyone reading your malicious statement proves! 2nd, you will be 70 maybe someday not sure if God will find you worth keeping till then. Thirdly you obviously were burned by some Filipino guy and you can’t find a new boyfriend so you went to a brothel and even there you were turned away because you looked 70 and couldn’t get it up anyway! Fella, find a purpose in life before someone helps you find a purpose for you! Learn to be respectful to humans not just a race of them. Grow up and you to will find the guy of your dreams as Me as a normal male of sexual preference found a beautiful Filipino wife!

      1. I think u were lucky to find a great filipina wife..i have also found a great pinay wife actually but i have observed so many filipinos cheating each other far more than my home country…just an observation..there are more dishonest filipinos than honest..I love them anyway
        they are fun people etc
        each culture has its strengths weaknesses..lying and cheating is philippines weakness
        its so tedious to say not all filipinas etc..of course a generalization is something which is generally true not always..zzzzzzz

    5. @Joseph. If you wish to use a prostitute so be it. Just don’t indulge in reductio ab absurdum. ie. If one is a prostitute – so are they all. Even if you hire a lady as an escort, (for a night a week or whatever) woo her, as you would a lover. A little bit of pretence and play-acting works fine for both of you. Even try it with your lady. Pick her up on the street, take her to a motel, and treat her like a prostitute. I bet when she gets home, she will have a light in her eyes, and a fire where it should be. Remember one thing though. Have an escape word worked out between you and your lady first. Don’t make it too short, but long enough to take some effort to say. Going by myself, and my lady, sometimes you want to say it, but you manage to regain control and continue.
      BTW. hippotomonstosesqippeddaliphobia….Is a tad too long.

      Purrrrrrrr….Marum.(El gato)

  108. I was with a foreigner for almost 2 years I did everything for him like a wife btw I never chat/meet to other guy and I didn’t ask him for anything in return he didn’t even give me presents and I didn’t complain about it, the only reason why I did that all is because I love him and now he left me because he will marry another girl so not all Filipinas are liars, materialistics, cheaters so don’t use the word “all”.

    1. 2 years is a short time. You didn’t prove that you also could turn to a gold digger eventually. What you point out however is that there are jerks in the men as well. Or maybe he left you cos you were already punishing him in the bedroom for not giving you more gifts!

    1. Saying most filipina are liars hurt me? I dont know if you do check every filipina in my land..like other race,you can find liars and cheater…

    2. Never trust a Filipino woman who poses like that in photos, LOL. Only the second woman in the blog is looking well. The rest are usually the ones who are greedy for money. I SWEAR, IT’S ALL IN HOW THEY SMILE. Hahahaha.

      We had a maid who would pose like that in photos. She talks to a lot of foreigners and tells them she loves them despite having a husband and 9 kids without them knowing. Her husband does not know. The foreigners do not know about the truth. She pretends to be separated and that she only has 5 kids. She is very clear on her purpose on why she is looking for a foreigner, she just wants the money. She wants the money quickly and gets annoyed when the man talks too much.

      I am just so glad that she doesn’t work for us anymore because she stole money from us.


  109. I’ve dated several Filipinas. Every time I try to post on this site the moderators delete my post because they don’t like it. Every Filipina I know and have dated were materialistic, and could care less if you are a kind, compassionate human being or not. They see everything as an exchange for service or presence. Their entire mindset is “what am I getting out of this?” I dated one for 4-months. Had a great time together, passionate, happy and one day she started asking about my retirement, how much my salary was, etc. I told her what teachers make in Arizona and her exact words “I make more than that!” She was gone…4-months of what I thought was an excellent relationship…all over $. I know one I dated not long ago who told me how her X-husband slowly moved all of his assets, liquidating them, before he divorced her. She ranted about getting out schemed for a two hour date. I just sat there thinking…”wow! They are all the same.” Sorry….no doubt this will get pulled by moderators too, but it is the truth. If you want hustled and stone cold…get a Filipina. I’m telling you, think with your brain gentlemen…..what would a 25 year old Filipina want with a 45 year old westerner? Open your eyes. A friend of mine from school got hustled out of his entire pension by a 25 year old Filipina. She talked him in to building a home there…in her name because you can’t buy and own as a westerner. Next thing he knew her whole family was living in it.

    1. I am a filipina and i am engaged to a Swedish guy… and i can tell you, you might have been looking for your match in the wrong places. Im a nurse and i am working as well. My fiance owns his own company so it would have been easy for me to just sit and ask. But not all filipinas are like the ones you have met. If you actually choose to mingle with people from a decent upbringing, then this would have never been an issue in the first place…

    2. You got the important points girl! Sad to say that’s exactly the mindset of other Filipinos, maybe because of jealousy, insecurities or they are just a judgemental person, but whatever they would say, I would just say. I DON’T CARE! Get a life and mind your own business! Lol
      I am 28 and my Dutch bf is 43. I love him so much despite of our age gap. I feel in love with him because of how amazing he is and not because of his wealth or visa and we never ever or I never even asked or talked about money. If ever will get married, I will still have to work so whenever my family ask for money I still can support them without depending on him. I am not a kind of person who loves spending and wasting others hard earned money. It does’nt mean you have a foreigner means you are rich or he is rich. It just happens that their money got a very high value when converted in peso. In terms of what they are saying “He just married you to become his maid”. Hello? Excuse me? They were raise independently and they can do the housechores without us and can do better than us. If beiNg a stay at home wife doing all the house chores w/ a foreign husband and living to other country makes us as a maid then we are not different to the wives in the Philippines.

      1. Filipino women are all liars . i dated one for 7 years we met then she cheated me she took advantage of of kindness. she lied through teeth about her mother being dead when her mother was alive she lied by saying her father killed her mother . she screwed me over and never again would i ever trust a women in the Philippines and never go there again . they are gold diggers scroungers. and low life bitches just the same with Ghana women to so its Filipino scam look on you tube and believe me guys never ever trust what they say. there is only about 20% reasonable girls out there but never again will i ever trust them girls ever again once you stop give money they will dump you once you start giving money your theirs forever

        1. Way too much rhetoric and generalities here, but consider this, its just logical. Men are deigned to procreate and run around, run about, work and come back and take care of the woman that had the procreator’s child. One thing I have noticed in the Pines are the number of single mothers there are. So there’s a lot of running around, f. . . g about and running ‘away’ going on but that happens everywhere. So here’s a generality to end all the generalities. IT TAKES ALL TYPES. . . . and they’re

          1. all women love money. and feminism has screwed it up further with ideas of financial independence, which means they try to possess all the money, not just theirs but yours as well. because it’s not equity feminism anymore, it’s gender feminism. women first kind of thing. and that’s what the government of philippines is doing too for not allowing foreigners to own houses in the philippines, so if you build a house soon it’ll be her and her new family who will live there and own it. it’s a con designed for the purpose and benefit of these single mothers. have foreigners pay their houses cos they’re too poor to afford it themselves, unless you’d count a shack a house.

      2. lol dont lie.

        You love him because he does and can do things for you.
        You also love the fact that you’re with a white guy and think you’re better than other filipinas with filipino men. You’re most likely much better looking than your partner and he can’t get women from his own race but since you’re after the status of being with a white man, you settle for him. You are with him because of his skin color and race.

    3. U have still bitterness mr.michael..im Filipina too,26 yrs old..and i don’t think 45or47 was a big difference when u love someone…in right time u will find ur true one..godbless ???

      1. a 45 or 47 year old white man who’ve worked 25+ years in a first world country would have assets and money. Thats the truth why you find them attractive. Their looks dont even matter, its their race and skin color, their assets and the “status” of being with a white man.

        I’ve been to Philippines and 18-24 year women would sell their whole body for an entire week for $500… I can only imagine what they’d do to have access to a 45 year old white man’s house, savings, car and other resources.

        1. Which sucks when you’re a younger man, like me, who got suckered by one of these vampires to pay for wedding, her processing to move out of the philippines etc. When she came here she met with other filipinas here and the infection of gold diggerism among these multiple divorcees spread to her and she start fighting over money. Then thinking of replacing with an older man who she found now with much more money. I tried to uphold peace and a caring home, but she didn’t give a F and started pointless fight just to justify me being bad, then eventual cheating and divorcing. Have 2 kids too and I wanted a simple life for them and for myself. But I feel the plan had been for the longest time to leech me dry and be replaced by another man from here with more income she could spend. I was used just as a ticket out of the shithole of a country and then there was no loyalty left in this world. I haven’t lost my ability to love, but I can never again trust a woman, especially not a filipina.

    4. Hi, reading your comment made me sad although i myself agree that there are more than enough women and men here in the Philippines who prefer money than true love but there are still those who are the exact opposite. I hope you find a decent Filipina, if you find the right one, you won’t regret it.

    5. I totally agree, they wait 2 years or so before they sting you, can we help momma, or 1 I had, her brother carried passengers on a bike with no insurance, so they thought I would pay his passengers medical bills, I told her I don’t drive my car without insurance so he shouldn’t have drove a motorbike without, I don’t work after a back injury but she thinks we should send money to her family, her family have no money, but they have money to be on the internet every day

  110. I’ve dated several Filipinas. Every time I try to post on this site the moderators delete my post because they don’t like it. Every Filipina I know and have dated were materialistic, and could care less if you are a kind, compassionate human being or not. They see everything as an exchange for service or presence. Their entire mindset is “what am I getting out of this?” I dated one for 4-months. Had a great time together, passionate, happy and one day she started asking about my retirement, how much my salary was, etc. I told her what teachers make in Arizona and her exact words “I make more than that!” She was gone…4-months of what I thought was an excellent relationship…all over $. I know one I dated not long ago who told me how her X-husband slowly moved all of his assets, liquidating them, before he divorced her. She ranted about getting out schemed for a two hour date. I just sat there thinking…”wow! They are all the same.” Sorry….no doubt this will get pulled by moderators too, but it is the truth. If you want hustled and stone cold…get a Filipina. I’m telling you, think with your brain gentlemen…..what would a 25 year old Filipina want with a 45 year old westerner? Open your eyes. A friend of mine from school got hustled out of his entire pension by a 25 year old Filipina. She talked him in to building a home there…in her name because you can’t buy and own as a westerner. Next thing he knew her whole family was living in it. If you want passion and someone who will literally fight for you go Latina…but be ready for her to be all over you about where you were, why did it take so long…trust me!

    1. They go after filipino men as well, especially elderly filipino men who’ve lived and worked in countries outside Philippines and have assets. My friend’s dad almost got conned for his savings, he met a filipina 30 year old when he visited his family and she would contact him twice a week with a sob story about how she needed money so bad. My friend’s dad sent hundreds a week to her and it kept going for months, until she asked him for 30,000 dollars so she can get surgery for her auntie who is dying… thats when my friend realized this was happening because her dad asked her to help him withdraw money and drop him off the airport so he can take the money to this lady in the Philippines. My friend immediately realized whats happening or what happened, women knows when other women are playing men… so she immediately put a stop to it and told her dad off.

  111. Hi, I have the same problem. I met a guy he is Australian and then, some people started talking about how Filipinas are gold diggers. Even my ex-friends were asking me if my intentions and feelings are true. I hate it when people generalized and stereotype “Filipinas” (Filipino women) as gold diggers and white supremacist. My husband is not rich. He works hard to pay for the bills. I work hard to pay for the bills. Its the same people. Both of us works hard to make ends meet. In fact my salary rate is higher than my husbands’. I love my husband greatly and he is my world and he loves me too. You cannot sustain a good relationship and understanding based on materialistic point of view. Yes of course, there are filipinas that do it for the wrong reasons but dont ever put all filipinas in a box with a label “GOLD DIGGERS”. Some of the comments I read in here is about how a filipina is intellectually challenge and some don’t have any skills. I am an educator. I worked as a teacher, professor in a university and a reading tutor. Who are you to say that filipinas are no skills and intelligence. It disgust me that a person could actually say that based on one or two women that he knows. I just want to be clear. Our love life is non of your business. if you have a miserable experience being with a filipina, maybe its your fault. Have you thought of that? grow a pair of balls and stop putting people in a box. Have a great life.


    2. So you just like them for their race and skin color and the status of being with a “White man”… got it!

      You probably hate or cannot stand filipino men and would never want a son that takes more filipino traits, you’d want him to look as white as possible.

  112. I liked your post 🙂 I think some of the stereotypes have a slightly diminishing presence nowadays. But they are certainly still there. And they live in the minds of people on both sides of the ocean. I am from Belgium and my girlfriend is from the Philippines she will soon be 22 I just turned 26. I have visited her Island (Negros) in January, discovered the popular sights, enjoyed the beautiful nature and the great food. I met her family, who were very warm and hospitable. Most importantly, the time I spent with my girlfriend there is by far the best time of my life so far 🙂 I literally enjoyed every second of it and I know she did to. Now, my parents are really cool and they would support me in any decision I make regarding my life, but I am sure some of my friends and family share some baseless thought behind my back :P. And to be honest I don’t really care to much about it. I won’t like them any less for it, as long as they keep it to themselves. Time will tell them they are wrong 🙂 It’s nice to see a lot of positive reactions, However, when I see some girls here saying “I work job x and I am perfectly independent” I do feel it’s unfair that you would have to say/prove that still in the first place. Currently my girlfriend is not working (she did before but quit, as she is not in a position where she needs to help support family or anything), but she has her degree and she is smart 🙂 she want to have her own business someday and I know she can succeed at that. I will help her with that anyway I can. If she one day gives up on that idea I will be fine with that as well. Her most important goal is still to have a happy live together and the rest are just means to make it possible 🙂 If there is any financial aspect to the relationship, than it is that I secretly do like the idea that i think she will make me a much better saver 😀 I was really teasing her hard because I know she likes ukuleles, but she never gave in to my attempts to let me buy her one (she has an old guitar already 😛 she will play on it until it turns to dust I guess). If I think at how much useless stuff I have bought before that added no value to my life whatsoever, I can only admire her discipline :O. I am really proud to be able to call her my girlfriend. I know I will learn a lot from her and she from me still and I’m very excited about the future. There is simply no one that could make me happier than she does (even with some distance). I will visit her again next month and I hope soon we will be able to live together soon enough. I wish the best of luck to all other couples here!

    1. Keep it up. My sister is married to a Belgian. They started as pen pal in those days, till they finally met each other sending my sister to Belgium which my brother in law has paid all the expenses. My sister met his family with a warm welcome. The family of my brother in law teach her all the Belgian customs and traditions. They got married in Belgium, had 3 beautiful girls and live happily ever after.

  113. The truth is, it is the proof of the existence of Colonial mentality. As a non-Filipino male who lived in the pH for 7 years and has also resided in various parts of the world. It is highly rare to see a Filipina who is dating someone who IS NOT white (this is referring to Filipina immigrants).

    I am not against interacial dating/marriage, but the Filipina is becoming an excemption. They are viewed as white supremacists in most countries because 9/10 of the filipinas you’ll meet have white boyfriends/husbands.
    There is even a joke about his in NYC and LA, one guy posted a vector poster of the top white supremacists in the world. You had Trump, Bejamin Forest, and the Filipina.

    filipinas should not pride your culture because it’s highly ironic that you are so closed door on White guys that you even reject your own. “I love my heritage” my ass.. In about 30+ years, the majority of filipinos will be half white and likely oblivious to their own cultures.. A damn shame too since Filipinos have the most interesting one, being a mix of Asian and Spanish in culture.

    1. Hey, people have preferences. Some are attracted to dark skin, some white, some love olive/tan skin, some love black. It’s like saying you should only many short guys because you’re short/petite.

      Is it wrong if I find a white or dark, tall guy with Caucasian features very attractive? I honestly don’t think we pinays are racists. Many of us love blacks. We don’t treat them like some Americans do. Many of us find them hot.

      1. Preference?

        Yes they prefer NON-filipino traits, they prefer the white skin, caucasian features and culture.

        Well saying “preference” is a politically correct way to make a pick based on what you deem superior.

        These filipina or other people saying “preference” for a certain race are simply self-hating or racists.

        You “prefer” to have kids who look white, you prefer to be seen with someone white… Preference is a word to mask biased views.

        You will get more respect if you just admit that you want to be white, you wish you were white and would want your off springs to be white looking as possible. Save people talking behind you and just come out with it.

    2. The younger filipinas who grew up in US or other english speaking countries or white dominated countries are 50/50… half would be with filipino guys, assuming they’ve known each other for a while and genuinely in-love… most of the other half would be with white guys because they see them as superior in status. You will see a good looking filipina with a very average or even ugly pale skinned white guy and you just know she’s with him because he’s white or rich, if he was mexican, asian or even black, she would not even look at him.

      Of course there will be the very rare good looking filipina girl with a very good looking white guy, genuinely attracted to each other for looks… as per normal, you can tell their relationship is due to physical attraction and not status or because of race. But its rare, because really good looking white men are with really good looking white women… so its the ugly, weird white men who cant get white women who chase filipinas because these filipinas would accept them because they are white…. ugly, fat, skinny, weird… but since they’re white… she doesnt mind.

  114. Would u admit u re a money digger when ur bf reads ur blog?
    Come on….

    I m not saying u re dishonnest or u lying
    Just that people used to say and act differently.

    That cedric seems full of hatred.
    Maybe scammed haha
    Filipina…or even filipino are not t more dumb or than anywhere else, u might be mista king with education.
    U seem like an old grumpy guy who didn’t get luck with his 20yo girl friends.

    Philippines are far from perfection, it s sometimes hard to cope for a westerner when everybody tries to scam , taxi, administration, vendors, real estate brokers, rental owner, etc etc….
    but pinays are not better nor worse than my country or yours.
    In USA, there are re t enough millionnaires for all us money diggers lol. But ll westerners are millionnaires…not hard, 1 million 20 0000euros,

  115. This article to me, seems to try to sell the Filipina women as women who do have a sense of true love.

    The author may have a good experience about her relationship but she tries to downplay the fact that MAJORITY of Filipinas do marry foreigners because of:

    >The parents want her to do so
    >She wants to be rich so that her poor parents can become rich
    >She wants good looking artistahin offspring.

    The author either wants to make Filipinas good to foreign men, or she is clueless on the sentiments of MAJORITY of Filipinas.

    Not a lot will admit it but a lot of Filipinas lack skills, talent, Responsibility, adaptability, and cognitive and intellectual capabilities.

    A lot of Filipinas prefer to enhance their physical looks than even be knowledgeable.

    That’s a fact. Not a lot will agree.

    Truth will always be ugly.

    Again the article brushes aside fact.
    She said “maybe in some cases”
    But fact is tgese cases are infinitely more prevalent than any of us will think.

    That’s why Foreigner-Filipina dating sites are prevalent here in the Philippines.

    Also most not all, of foreign men cannot handle the tenacity and independence and intellectual capacities of women from their own country so the prefer the weaker willed, less intellectually capable Filipina. That way they can easily be controlled.

    Trust me, MORE Filipinas prefer foreigners not for love as this fairy tale article suggests.
    Most Filipinas unfairly generalize Filipino men as useless heartless animals when they are just as heartless as well.

    Don’t stick your heads into the sand, face the truth.

    Our media shows preference for getting a foreign partner. The masses follow suit

    To the other comments below, bragging bout their foreign partners, come on, your making it sound emphatic when you say you all have them for pure love and Filipino men aren’t bad yet you have a foreign partner.

    And those comments about “Being unfairly judged”?


    Judgment like this exists because it is more often than not, TRUE!

    That’s why its been like this anyway!!!

    Fact is one of my exes was taught by her mother to look for men with money specially foreigners!!!

    You know what, after she broke up with me, i found proof that she went out with 6 foreigners on different

    My aunt, wanted me to marry a foreign woman for money!
    Me? A Man? A Filipino? And a relative wants me to marry a foreigner?

    This proves that 10 to 20% of foreign partnerships are based on fraud.

    1. Generally speaking there are 3 classes in Filipino society, the HiSos (less than 5%), the Middle class (about 25%) and the rest (70%).

      The HiSos would not be caught dead speaking to a foreigner let alone getting romantically involved with one.

      The middle classes can usually find an acceptable husband amongst the Filipinos in their own class or are generally not motivated by the venal demands of their families or do not need to marry a foreigner if they want to work overseas because they are reasonably well educated an can get the jobs themselves.

      Its the other 70% (The Majority) that foreigners need to watch out for and be 100% certain of the Filipinas motivations in wanting to marry them especially if she is more than 10 years younger than the foreigner because generally they or their family do want your money or a Visa.

    2. For Cedric,

      You can’t blame Filipinas if they fall in love with foreign men. In your life, were you able to try wooing or courting a foreign woman? In the foreigners I’ve dated, ofcourse, at first it was physical attraction. But what made the relationship last is the connection we had in conversation, hobbies, traveling together and mostly because they find me sincere, intelligent yet soft.
      I tried dating back with Filipino men and all I get is judgment(mostly because I am morena and they like mestiza, I am voluptuous and Filipino likes slender) and unfaithfulness!
      Kach, the author, is just saying that indeed some of the misconceptions happen in real life. But wait, there are Filipinas out there who is really out for love and you can’t blame if we are FOUND by foreign men. And we are professionals earning enough to be independent in life.
      One Italian I’ve dated (who lived in 5 countries in his life) told me I am so different from other girls he met, commending me as “not just a pretty face” and “definitely not a representative of a Filipina”. Cause he met some Filipinas along the way & he can’t converse well with them. So my point is, enough of the judgment. I’ve had BAD experiences with Filipino men, so don’t blame us if some foreign men treats us more of a Queen than Filipinos who see us as a rag.

    3. Its so obvious.

      The white man would be old or ugly, but the filipina would attractive and would have no problem finding a handsome filipino man. But instead she’s with this old white man or ugly white man, because he can provide her with money, status or other resources that she deems beneficial to her needs or wants.

      No one is getting fooled…

      You see a petite bodied cute filipina, maybe in her mid 20s, come from a family that struggled in life, she will target a white man… preferrably older with money. If not, she will target an ugly white man similar to her age in hopes that it’ll boost her status anyways.

      If both are good looking, the filipina and the white man, it appears more genuine, but this is super rare, because good looking white men will likely be with good looking white women, and thats nature doing its work… people of similar backgrounds will find each other more attractive in regards to procreation, unless you self hate or worship a specific race.

    4. That’s why I choose to be a single.. . 🙂 Life is too short to spend in bitterness and being judgmental to other people… don’t let other people rule your life or being dependent on them.. coz.. you are the master of your faith and you are the captain of your soul.. 🙂

  116. You made a disclaimer saying that this is your personal experience and you are not generalizing. But your title and points suggests the opposite. By titling it to: “Truth and Lies about Filipinas with Foreigners!”, you are making an emphatic statement. Probably you can defend yourself but you cannot make a general and emphatic statement and “points” and somehow try to make it appear to be true to all. Out of all the Filipinas of your kind who happen to marry/be in a relationshipe with a foreigner for the reason of “pure love”, 20 percent is a good number, and that is being very conservative. I am from Cebu and living very near condominiums where I “always” see old western men with their filipina partner (mostly in early 20’s and early 30’s). And take note, I “haven’t” a young western man with a Filipina. So probably all the points you’ve shared here is true to yourself, but generally, it is quite the opposite.

    1. Every Pinay will tell you that there are those bad girls which are only after money or visas but will add: “BUT I AM DIFFERENT” ???

    2. Hi, I am 26 year old, and Filipina. I’ve dated 2 foreigners, one I dated for 3 years – I was 5 years older than him, in fact he was 18 when we dated. We broke up because there are circumstances in life that we really can’t control. The relationship became too toxic for both of us to handle. We both struggled and hustled during those 3 years. Now I am dating another foreigner, maybe because I find them more faithful, more sweet, honest and straight to the point. I can speak more freely with them what’s on my mind and not being closed off as being deemed as crazy like other Filipino men and it’s really amazing how we can converse Intellectually. The funny thing as I read the comments here most of them are true, even when I first dated my Ex and my friends found out that he’s a foreigner the first question they will always ask is if he sends me money!!!! I am very shocked and very much insulted because after *48 years* the stigma never disappeared! I cannot lie that I’ve seen a lot of Filipina (when I was around 14) especially with no skills take advantage of this kind of scheming but hey, foreigners are also taking advantage of this! no shame at all going to malls with teenagers! Pedophiles everywhere! and when they get scammed they all grow bitter! It’s a matter of choice whatever the race!

    3. You know what, recently its not just the “older” white men that are hooking up with the gold digging filipinas.

      Recently due to China and Korea’s growth into the country, you will see plenty of young filipina with rich or well off Chinese and Koreans, the thing is… Chinese and Koreans tend to look down on filipinas and would rarely marry them, so they just impregnate them and leave. This trend is increasing…

      A big portion of local Filipinas are so easily manipulated if you dangle wealth, status or a chance of a better life in their face… they will trade in their integrity, their bodies and their soul to escape or get a boost in their lives.

      Some filipinas obviously are very good, they dont chase the money, resources or status. They are the ones that stick with their filipino men through richer or poorer. Not all filipinas who hook up with foreigners are gold diggers but MOST are, like 7/10 are… probably 8/10.

    4. LOL. Given all the grammar faults in your reply, I don’t think I will be giving it any credit. Don’t start sentences with, “But”, “So”, or dangling Participles when you are criticizing how another writes. P.S. 7 Filipina Ex’s, 7 Liars. They dig to find your worst nightmare, and make it their life conviction to make your nightmare come true. That is how Filipina Women argue. No Morals, 10th Grade Education, and any disagreement is met with “Tampoo.” Tampoo is not only a silent treatment, but also an indicator that she has someone else to occupy her time with. Yes, other than you. Stop all marriage immigration from the Philippines to the U.S. The Philippines is an “Individualistic” Society. Not driven by religion, not driven by thousands of years of culture as China, Korea, Thailand, or Japan. Don’t make the mistake of misplacing authentic Asian stereotypes to Filipinas. They don’t have the moral aptitude to practice, nor adhere to Social Norms. Norms are dismissed in place of individual wants, “Individualistic”. In advanced culture, lies, deceit, and cheating is against the Norm. Those from individualistic cultures will violate this norm, laugh at you because you didn’t have this piece of information. Norms in society establish structure for Laws. Now you have the reason Filipinas are so blatant about breaking the law in the United States.

  117. Im dating a British guy too, he’s funny, sweet, very supportive in everything i do, very makulit, maloko, we’ve been dating for almost 2 years now, he has been here in Philippines twice, he loves my family, my mom’s cooking, and everything about Philippines (except for those people who try to take advantage coz he’s a white guy, like at taxi or trycicle) We’re happy, and we both are bless to have each other.
    Is he old? No, he’s 28 and im 24. Is he rich? No, he works hard everyday just like what other people do. Do i ask money? I never ask for money ever, we bought a mio bike here in Philippines, so that everytime he come back home we have a ride wherever we want to, go and he’s the one whose paying it, i never ask for it, he wanted it. Do we fight/argue? Yep, lots of times, i think we learning both of each other cultures and belief, we’re worked hard on what we have now and still in a work process, love is not just a happily ever after, its a matter of time, respect, trust, efforts, goals and many more thing. Do i have a job? Yep, im working as a pharmacy assistant her3 in Philippines. Does his family know about me? Yes, I’ve talked to her mom couple of time, and they are happy for us. Do we plan on getting married? We talked bout it lot of times, we wanted to be more stable to support the family that we gonna build. Do we love each other? As he always say he just dont love me, he is madly deeply inlove with me and i do love him more than anything in this world. We wanted to be together its just a matter of time and also money. Ooppss! I forgot to say he wanted to retire here when we gets old. ?

    1. Why didnt you end up with a local Filipino guy?

      Did you or were you waiting for a foreigner as a boyfriend?

      And hate to tell you, but your boyfriend has another girl in his country. I’m from Canada and a couple of my male friends one is white the other is half white/half filipino, found girlfriends when they stayed in Philippines for a few weeks. They chat to each other online and when they visit they see other, maybe once a year.

      But guess what, they also have girlfriends here in Canada. They love going to Philippines because they find girls easy, because they dont look like local filipinos.
      Filipinas are obsessed about them, but they just play them, they are side chicks who love foreigners would accept such relationship conditions because of their desperation to be with foreigners.

      Its sad… but thats how it works.

      Old white men use filipinas for sex, filipinas use old white men for resources.
      Young foreigners use filipinas for sex, filipinas use these foreigners for status and for hope of one day escaping the country…. Exchanging benefits or hopes.

  118. I feel you on this. I am also dating a foreigner. We’ve been together for more than 2 years and honestly it has been the best relationship I ever had (we are not so officially engaged. He asked I said yes, but he wants to ask my mom’s blessing. He does respect our culture). I had dated local men as well but it’s not about where they came from, it’s about how the relationship goes and how well does the guy treat you.

    Whenever I tell people I am dating a foreigner I always get basically the same reaction and thoughts as yours:
    “Wow you can have easy access to the US” – uhmm no, if it’s possible, I rather live here where I am near my family.
    “He’s rich, isnt he? You’re into his money” – not really, he is just a basic average person who works to save up money.
    “You must have meet him in dating sites!” – well I met him online, but no, it wasnt a dating site. We met while playing an online game, we talked, found out we had a lot of things in common. I even told him not to fall for me because I wasn’t ready to be committed but hey, he didnt give up, so here we are

    One thing that irked me though is what some foreigners thing about us as well. His family doesnt much accepts me and tried to break us apart, because according to them, we are from a 3rd world country and I am only after his money/Im a gold digger and an easy access to the US. I have a good paying job here, which pays all my bills and enough extra to spoil myself and occasionally my family, why would I give that all up for a life I am not even sure where to go? I am with him because he makes me feel love, inspires me, picks me up when im down and just basically there for me

    So to all gals out there dating foreigner. Screw what others think. Your life your decision. As long as you are not putting down anyone or destroying lives. I wish you all well. And those who are getting married, I hope for the best for you’ll <3

    1. I am not against interacial dating/marriage, but the Filipina is becoming an excemption. You girls have built a reputation/stereotype in different parts of the world to be white supremacists because 9/10 of the filipina immigrants you’ll meet in major cities have white boyfriends/husbands.

      Why is that? You have to be honest that this is solid colonial mentality.

      When i lived in LA, there used to be jokes about this: in where one guy posted a vector poster of the top white supremacists in the world. You had Trump, Bejamin Forest, and the Filipina.

      filipinas should not pride their culture because it’s highly ironic that you are so closed door on White guys that you even reject your own. “I love my heritage” my ass.. In about 30+ years, the majority of filipinos will be half white and likely oblivious to their own cultures.. A damn shame too since Filipinos have the most interesting one, being a mix of Asian and Spanish in culture.

      1. Danny, You forgot the african race was also a apart of the filipino development of their race. How do you think some of them they get their brown skin color from? Their race is from the immigration of asian, spanish and african races mixing. I myself think its a pretty interesting mix especially for the women.

    2. There’s a reason why he was desperate for you, because he couldnt meet women in his country and he KNOWS filipinas are desperate for White men. Go do research on US forums, plenty of White men with Asian fetishes are weird, nerdy or weak with women from their race or country.

      And on the flip side, filipinas are known to marry or get into relationships with white men because of the resources he can provide, or because they put white men on the pedestal (they treat them like superior men)

      Ask yourself, would you be with him if he was Asian? or if he was Black? or if he was Mexican or South American?

      Filipinas ARE known as gold diggers and White men worshippers.

  119. I’m a Filipina and I also had a European boyfriend, but hey. I’m not asking money from him, I worked hard on my own and supports my family. We’re both young lovers. Just love, PURE Love. I used my profession wisely and work on my own without asking help from him.

    1. PURE love of his whiteness and status!
      The thought of being associated with someone white is what you are in love with.

  120. Let me tell u clearly filipinas are just making money from their bodies like bitches.
    Back to the country they r either married already or already hv had a puppy.
    So dont ever think of marrying them as they only know one thing in this world and that is money. If u hv it they r on ur thighs and if u dont hv it then u r under their foot.

    1. This is so true… They will backmail you after their get your citizenship as well…

      Don’t ever marry with a filipinas, they are lazy, always asking money and have an affairs with other men.

      Their culture is like living a fake sense like they go to church to confess their mistakes again again til they die.

      1. then look for a decent filipina…there are a lot of educated filipinas

        i believed , you meet her at the night club or resto. bars who wants easy money , waste money or a happy go lucky girl

        1. The decent filipinas have been courted by the decent filipino men and have family together.

          The gold diggers and white worshippers disregard filipino men, because they hate being filipino and love white people.

          1. Your comment is not all cut and dry a small percentage of the gold diggers as you put it do go after black men, How do i know cus hell it happen to me too many numerous times so its a fact that as long as you have the mighty dollar your a target, But i do agree with you as far as the educated ones hard to find i traveled the philippines 7 times times i get mistaken for Kobe Bryant all the time because im black dont look nothing like Kobe have been approached by many women there im black and handsome as Wesley Snipes. None of these women are what you call college educated most were village girls living in mountains or poor province area,

      2. All philipine women are cheaters and scammers. I know a lot of men who have paid their philipinnes wife a house and have lost theirs.

  121. Thank you for your sharibg. Good luck w Jon and your continued journey. It’s uplifting at a certain point and challebging as well. I hope to learn more about this kind of situation thru your or others’ sharing

  122. We can’t really avoid people who think that way. Reality check: it really does exist, HOWEVER, not all but some. Which is sad.

    I’ve been dating my fiance for almost a year now and it never happened at one point i asked money from him. I agree with your “he works, i work.. he saves , i save.. equal parternership”. During our first month, we already established that part. He works as an IT and I am a nurse and working my ass out to be independent. So? ? Visa is not that much of an issue as medical professional. Lol

    Key points about filipina-foreigner relationship:
    1. Get to know your partner really well
    2. Set what to expect from each other (be truthful)
    3. Not all filipinas are truthful BUT NOT ALL FOREIGN ARE TRUTHFUL

    Goodluck everyone!

  123. Im gay and had an Italian exBoyfriend. I love the way you write the article. You clearly speak the voice of clarity to the fool. But i was waiting for the quarrel. If how did you manage to fix it. Because mine is so terrible. It’s one of the reason why i called it quits.

  124. I was engaged to a foreign man and we will be married next year. He is a pilot and I’m a teacher. I think this article would help all of the filipinas who have the same issues of being judged with other people because of the advantages we can get when we date or marry a foreigner. but for us, money, not even the statuses arent an issue. If its a real love, whether he is a foreign or not, you will love him with all your heart. thankfully, my fiancee isn’t too old though, he is just 4 years older than me and maybe thats the reason why people doesnt think that he is my sugar daddy. Lol.

    1. The judgement is really based on the “you want money/visa”. That judgement is based on the phenomena that 9/10 filipinas you will meet in major cities date only white guys. Even rejecting their own.

      It’s obvious out of colonial brainwashing in that country in where being white is highly needed. You love white more than your own heritage, if that isn’t true then answer why the majority of filipinas are closed door to only whites?

      1. It really is a phenomenon.

        Let’s reverse it and have 9/10 Filipino men only date WHITE women.

        They would feel the same… even worse.

        The thing is, because they are women and men will always be the one doing the chasing, so they are picky and they pick White men. It’s not a good thing, using “preference” as a weapon to defend their bias, no one buys it. EVERYONE knows.

  125. I love it..haha…let’s add some to that..they do think that when you got foreign man you are extravagant..that you are lucky and has a lot of money..like me..they even asked me to borrow money from me. .then I said “oh..I just have enough for myself “…then they would say to their selves “arrogant and merciless coz she got her foreign guy. Don’t even share her blessings”..and me ????..like seriously I’m having issues with money but i Don’t ever depend on my man coz I know he got his money for his needs and savings too..so filipino mentality that thinks a Filipina is holding a millions of money coz with a foreign guy..??????

  126. Do Filipino women who jump into relationships with white men ever think about the families and long term marriages that they break up because they are younger, smaller and cuter than the wife that gave birth to their “white partners” children, worked their butts off for a future with the man they loved and then were abandoned. Then, play the I can’t recieve communion because I live with you and want to get married, card. It is bullshit and selling their souls…but at what cost?

    1. I’d say no they don’t. They often don’t even question why is it that he cannot get along in his own culture? What are his legal responsibilities to that family? Physical/mental health/financial situation In most cases a home country back ground check and references is needed before anything serious develops. Many are hiding and know a woman in their own culture would be smart enough to dig into these things.

  127. I’m also a Filipina dating a white guy, but definitely not for his money. I grew up with a diverse background, having lived in different countries. I always get that same judgment from fellow Filipinos (particularly staff from hotels, restaurants, malls, etc) that I’m only with him for his money. They clearly treat him different than me. But what they didn’t know is that I even earn slightly higher than him. I hate how there’s that stereotype of Filipino girls going gaga over white men’s money.

    1. You’re the second type… you date white men almost exclusively, you may sometime stray away from dating white men and date an olive skin man, but would hardly look at any filipino men, black men or even other asian men.

      You are a Status chaser, you KNOW plenty of filipinas crave White men and you love it, you love making them jealous that you’re with a white man.

      You value white men highest out of all races, in fact you would love to be white. You love the freedom white women get to experience and get exposed to and you would love to be associated with white circles. Sure you talk to fellow asians or filipino “acquaintances”, but you cant stand them. You rather be hanging out with other white women with their white boyfriends and wishing a better looking white man notice you so you can upgrade.

  128. My husband is 60. He had an affair while he was married to me and ask her to marry him and gave her a ring before even announcing to me for a divorce. It was an online affair for one year and then they met, had sex, met her family and he proposed. We are still married and he wants to bring her over to the states. She is 16 years younger then he is. What should I think and isn’t there a civil law in the Philippines. They say it’s for love, but it ll sounds fishy for me. I’m also partially handicap.

    1. Unfortunately, this article is only telling on her personal experience but it is trying to generalize that is true to all. What you are experiencing, maam, is the “real common” thing.

    2. Sad situation 🙁 but I am not completely one-side about this. 16 years seems to me on the border of the acceptable/normal. Though the way it happened is not ok (asking her first before divorce), such a thing does not occur in functional relationship. And I do not think people should stay together just because they once said that aloud in front of a few people, or because a book says so. I do believe in staying together with someone life, but both partners should never give up on trying to make each other happy, there always needs to be a balance. If a long term relationship breaks that balance was most likely gone for a while already. That you are partially handicapped adds nothing relevant to the story I fear.

    1. her name is erlinda Soriano bayne lives in pias Pampanga pi ive been married to her for 20 plus years you do not know violence that I have experienced from my wife I endured all yes I stuck it out becaused I lioved her yes love is blind she kicked me out of the home I bult for her gave all I had and even turned my back of my country the uk they philippinas have long term plans that is marry pretend to be thesexy loving wife until they have got all they can from you then they will dump you don’t expect any help barrio relatives police lawers so called friends courts embassy your on your own and if no money your going to end up in big trouble you have no rights in the pi check to prove this every thing belongs to your so called wife I mean everything even personal belongings you can have my email erniebayne @yahoo.co.uk they will break your heart and empty your pockets even if they have to wait years you will not know it but you will be riped off on a daily basis by your wife no matter how good you think she is and sure things don’t get better if you contact me I can tell you stories that you will never believe advice don’t trust one little bit I’m not the only one hundreds have had the shit played on them

  129. Not true, my fiance was denied a visiting visa here, to the US, as she could “TNT”..she is a wheelchair user like me, has a house in Cavite, works for a Insurance company in QC, has a degree in accounting,makes 40,000 php. has family but she, and 2 dozen other Filipinos were denied visas at the Manila embassy I am a paraplegic, she a polio survivor who can take a jet while my electric chair makes it impossible for me.The passport means nothing nowadays .Now If she wants to visit the US to meet me, my family see what Western Washington is like, she needs to come over under a fiance visa.It is a very involved process .

  130. hey…
    I am also chatting with a filipino from some days but I dont know why she always talk about materialistic things (phone , makeup stuff and sometimes money also)…
    I cant give her anything cuz I dont have a good job to fulfill her needs.
    also I think about if she only loves money not money…
    she is good , caring and beautiful also
    I guess she is 20 and me 23
    I wanna marry her .
    being from india
    what I could do to visit her and marry her
    I want to live with her forever but I doubt about her nature and her objectionable demands…
    please help me out…

    1. I’
      m british my email is my advise avoid her like the plaque and if u go to the Philippines u have no rights and need big money to survive they will break your hart and empty your pockets

  131. Thanks ma’am I agree this because all white think all pinay are gold digger… Even not all… Of course they have lot of money because there salary is expensive and here it’s cheap but it’s really same they work and we work… The difference is the currency only….

  132. I rented a room to a pretty little Philipina and her white, American husband for about 2 years and they took off one Saturday when I was not home. They gave no notice and left owing me $1000.00. The room was a mess! They left the room very dirty and failed to report slow drains and other plumbing issues. Do not rent to Filipinos!

    1. Yeah, but you could just as well say, “Do not rent to white American men”!

      I am white, but not American, and unfortunately I WAS married to a filipina scammer, so I know that a lot of the things said above are true. But I never say or believe that it applies to ALL filipinas. That would be racist, and I do not agree with racism. But it seems true that a helluva lot of filipinas, being relatively poor, are very money oriented. What the percentage is, I have no idea, because no surveys are done on that matter, and anyway, who is going to SAY they are? And don’t forget we can only say on what we see and read about — which automatically can induce distortions.

      “Matandang Mayaman, Madaling Mamatay (Old, Rich, and Soon to die)….” Yup, true to form, that’s exactly what my ex went for! And it seems to me, it is certainly a reflection of their cultural values if they even have an EXPRESSION for it.

      The original writer, a filipina who married a foreigner, even talks about the stigma that filipinas involved with, or marrying, foreigners are supposedly only interested in one thing — “greener pastures in the good old US of A — or any western country!” Certainly you do not find this kind of thing in China, Malaysia, Laos, or probably Vietnam or Cambodia (although you do, apparently, to some extent in Thailand — a real change from when I was living there, as in those days NO girl would ever even go out with a “farang”!)

      So, it is to do with poverty, yes — but also language, and the culture, like being very outward-looking, since of course America was in charge for some years. And probably something to do with religion, and its ban on contraception, and the fact that filipino men often seem to have little respect for the sanctity of marriage — from what I have HEARD.

      But as Arthur Schopenhaeur said, “Everyone takes the limits of his own vision for [to be] the limits of the world.”

      It is not easy to have a balanced view — especially if/when you have recently been horribly scammed by a “lovely filipina”. As for the guy above who stoutly maintains, “I’m married to a filipina, and I KNOW”, I’d say go back to the paragraph above. You can’t extrapolate from ONE, to make realistic and sensible statements about a whole population. On the other hand, if you’ve been “burned” just once, you can’t help but be very careful in the future.

      It’s called “adaptive behaviour” — and we had better be aware of it.

      1. I like your comment, it’s sound and more balanced compared to other commenters here.

        There are good and bad people everywhere. To foreigners who are so negative to us pinays (whether we deserve it or not), I suggest to find someone in your own country. Why travel all the way here if you hate/dislike us much. It doesn’t make sense.

        I’m attracted to Caucasians, is it wrong to have preferences? Is it wrong to prefer someone responsible, hard working and not a loser? Are far as I know we are still free to marry whomever we want. I understand some are jealous or have terrible experiences.

        To those who have bad experiences, I really feel sorry for you, but please use common sense -like get to know the person better first before getting serious. Be selective, do not get involve or hang around with someone who’s shady character -these applies to anyone -pinays or not.

      2. In my experience Thai women are the worst or most cunning. It is a national sport to them to seperate a farang from his money. They make the bad Filipinas look like amatauers.

        This applies to a large percentage of Thai women. Not just the bar girls. Of course over there you have office workers and profoessionals that will prositute on the side (sugar daddy arrangement with multiple partners), uni students that will do the same so they don’t have to work or so they can buy a new iPhone, “normal” women that I swear all had a price.

        I was personally bilked and cheated out of a house I bought with someone (fiance)who was cheating on me with men AND women. Like old nasty dyke women. All for the money. Thai’s generally do not care about you as a person (you might as well not be human in their eyes). I like Thailand but hate the Thai’s at this point. They have two prices over there-one for Thais and one for everyone else. The times I was ripped off in Phillipines were not near as often or expensive.

        Sorry but I am still quite bitter about the whole experience.

      3. I’m Filipino living in Canada, I am currently married, but when I went to Philippines to visit my family relatives the amount of filipina women who started giving me attention after they found out I was from Canada was ridiculous.

        I always tell my wife that if we break up and separate, I would be fine, because I have 10 potential wives waiting in the Philippines half her age. She absolutely hates it and refuse to lose to a bunch of Gold diggers so she’s nicer to me than before, we still fight but she doesn’t go full angry anymore, as in break my stuff.

  133. What do filipino men say about all this? That their young women run away with often older foreigners? Do they not feel awkward that a young girl prefer an sometimes bald and fat old man instead of a young handsome filipino man? Does that not create tensions in the Philippine society and recentment from the guys against the old men, but also against many filipina women?

    1. It’s becoming a norm in the philippines especially to provinces. Practicality-wise some filipina use Old/fat rich white to milk money. As of ratio 1filipino:13filipina so it’s not awkward or big deal to take notice of.

    2. of course it’s bad, but what are you going to do? We cannot force anyone (pinay or foreigner) for their choices -whether it’s good or bad. Everyone has to live with the consequences of their own decisions. And it’s their business.

    3. they hate it, thats why its a fight for a decent filipina girl who actually likes filipino men.

  134. Thank you for an interesting article. May I ask if you have some estimation of how many percent of Filipina women who has a foreign husband or boyfriend? 1%, 10% or mayb 50%. It would be interesting to know.
    But it seems that there are more than in many other countries. Here in the west not so many women would date a foreigner, especially if he was not white. And in many muslim countries who is even more poor than the Philippines it would be totally unthinkable for women to date or marry any white, western foreigner.

    Take care


  135. Hi everyone… I am always judge because I am way look younger with my partner- he is 48 and I am 34… but I look like a 20 years old….If we are eating in a restaurant or going in a mall, some people talk about us and having harsh comment… Both of us are working which means I am not about his money or citizenship because I told him that I want us to stay here. Don’t know how to deal with judgmental people… I always ignore but if I am alone it goes on my head.

  136. All Philippine women are same, bullshit stories aleays struggling to find a weaterner, what happen to there men ???

    1. Why blame it to filipinos then? Lol you know sometimes filipinos are submissive in some sorts. So maybe she just followed her american husband told her to do so. Stop pointing fingers on filipinos. There are some nasty foreign people too! What is exactly your point?

    2. Don’s be such a cry baby, you are acting like a soar loser! If you have been ripped off by a filipina, that’s your fault because you are so dumb ass person. Remember: no one will take advantage on you not unless you give them the license to do it. So who is dumb now? I really don’t tolerate douche like you!

  137. I think this writer is just a bit of bitter in other Filipina then you? You hide from the truth that you are the one of your wrote. Freak you are!

  138. Native of the Philippines here but only half-Fil by lineage. It’s funny because some of my non-Fil friends here in Manila have sometimes asked me for some job referrals because they need money to survive in Manila. I myself am kinda seeing an American guy right now and he shares with me his financial woes he’s facing because of misguided decisions he made even before he met me. I share with him my own problems at work. I speak for myself when I say he and I amazingly get along very well, so much better than my interactions with Filipino men.I consider him to be my intellectual equal, and a great friend, two things I want to have in my relationship. The only money he’s ever sent to me was one dollar to my PayPal account, just to check if it works or not (I only received 66 cents because of transaction charges, and this has become a private joke between him and me, that he’s such a stingy white guy and I’m the cheapest Asian woman, hahaha! ). He’s only two years older than me, and despite other men , Filipino and non-Fil liking me, younger or older than me, I chose him because his values and opinions are similar to mine. Bottom line is, for whatever reason two people get together, they shouldn’t care what others think as long as they are happy. It’s nobody’s business whatever they do and people who pass judgement are usually envious of the happiness the couple has.

    1. don’t flatter yourself most men aged 50 and under would stick their dick into a vaccum cleaner so don’t say ”Filipino and non-Fil liking me, younger or older than me, I chose him because his values and opinions are similar to mine”

      look at it logically.. you’re just a fire hydrant that’s currently convienient.

  139. Thanks for sharing Kach. Well said! My husband shared this to me who is an English man. I really wish that one day, people of all nationality would have an open understanding about this. Well done to you and Jonathan, bless both of you.

  140. The definiton of a foreigner seems to be limied to white foreigners. So the artile should be “filipinas marrying white foreigners”. And why only filipinas? what about filipinos marrying white foreigners (women)? Please be critical of the languages and peconceptions and misconceptions, which is what this article is supposed to be about, instead of propagating stereotypes, misnomers, and misconceptions. If you mean white say it! If you mean not white, say it! Oscar Peñaranda, writer, educator and a non-whhite foreigner.

  141. Hello i just found this article while browsing on my endless newsfeed on fb… And wow! Everything in here is true! I really love the article, i really wished to read more, thanks alot! It really inspires me….. Wished to read more!! God bless! And more power! 😉 ^_^

  142. I love reading your blog Kach! And congratulations too. I can totally relate with this article.

    Anyway a word of advice, foreigner or filo, if your gf/bf starts asking money or starts complaining and bitching how they are in desperate need of financial assistance, run away as fast as you can in the other direction. More often than not, that “need” will never stop once you give in. You will be inundated with never-ending sad stories. Sad reality here is that a lot of filos think that dating white skin (foreigner) equals financial freedom, they don’t know any better… BUT YOU SHOULD. Even their families encourage it, they are conditioned to thinking that they should support the entire family, even the whole baranggay (throw in the next town’s askals too for good measure), and that you should too. In fact, if you think that they would change once you have your own kids… fat chance that would be happening. They would still put their families back home first, not your own family. Thats what they call “Utang-na-loob”, something they can never repay. Their parents will never make them forget where they come from, not realising they were not wanted in the first place. The Philippines being so Catholic, discourages artificial birth control, (hence the large number of kids)and they can’t buy them anyway for lack of money.

    But make no mistake, there are stories too when the partner is working with a good career or job and still, would scam you of your hard earned money. They all come in shapes and sizes, most are very ‘sweet’ and ‘loving’ who thinks the world of you, then after sending a couple of thousand dollars would suddenly disappear. Again, it doesn’t happen only here in the Philippines, it happens everywhere but more in a country where there is not much hope. I just hate seeing anybody hurt, so be wary! I hope we all find “the one”, irregardless of race or color. So good luck!

    1. Very true I experienced this nasty type of relationship in cebu with my ex fiancee. Believe me my two years relationship with my ex fiancee a straight psychopath and gold digger made me realise treachery is coded in to their dna whether educated, poor or rich filipina. I know NOT all of them have this devilish personality trait but it is very much prevalent amongs them in their society. Another thing I noticed is their passive agrressive attitude, humility and empathy is a value system very scarce on the ground. Having said all I have met really lovely and genuine Filipinos and Filipinas in the Philippines and Abroad and still very much like the people and country but CAUTION & BE CAREFUL is the Gospel . Watch where you go , who you meet and yes protect your wallet , emotions and heart .

  143. Hi Kach, all you wrote here are true, I’m a Filipina married to a New Zealander but long before him I dated 3 other men.

    I came from a middle class family, had a degree in a reputable school in Manila, My life was home, university and back home again, until I met my very first boyfriend while I was on a surfing trip in la union, he was 12 years older than me and a senior executive in Disney inc. our relationship lasted for 3 years until I call it off when he blurted out that I was getting fat and he wanted a sexier slimmer gf when my waist size was 24, I thought why wait for him to dump me when I can dump him? So I broke it off, hindi sa nag yayabang ako but he tried to win me back saying he was just kidding. Duh?!

    Then after him while working as an intern in a fancy hotel in Singapore I met a Dutch pilot, he said he was divorced with 2 kids, he was nice and sweet and all so after a couple of dates in a span of two months I said yes, our relationship lasted for a year or so until, my sister who is a computer savvy working in Canada found his company profile and found out he was actually married and just using me as his lay over gf while on his duty in Singapore. Needless to say we broke up, leaving me with a broken heart.

    Then after him I dated an Australian guy, younger than both guys above, super chill, super cool, but jobless and under the support of his rich parents back in Oz, he offered to bring me to OZ, promising a better life than what my life was in Singapore, but I thought I rather stay in Si galore where I have a decent job and earning more than what I needed, why move to Oz and stay under his parents roof and be fed by them when I can fed my self and support my self in Singapore? He doesn’t want to work, he said his parents money was more than enough for both of us to survive, I’m a hard working woman from a hard working family, and it’s a shame to be somebody else’s burden especially if that somebody else is not the partner.

    I must admit that while I was still with him I met somebody else and that somebody else is no other than my husband, the person I chosen to be with and whom I felt more loved and secured. I met my now husband on a holiday trip in New Zealand, he just an ordinary guy doing a blue collar job, his family are the same, he was a divorcee with no children. He doesn’t promise me anything, and as far as I can remember I paid the bill on our very first dinner date.

    After the tour a couple of months after he followed me in Singapore and stayed for a week and our relationship was maintained through Skype after that, he stayed in my apartment ate my food and only paid for dinner or lunches once or twice. We dated for two years while I was still in a relationship with the Australian guy, they both know about each other, and accepted where they stand in my life. Believe me I loved them both, and I don’t want to hurt any of them, but I must admit that keeping them both is selfish and immoral, so one day I decided that I should choose one of them or decide to loose them both. But they made choosing easy for me, they both offered to have me stay with them and meet their family for a month, which I accepted.

    I have nothing to say abouth the Australian guy’s family, both parents where nice and good to me, the only thing I can say was they spoilt their son so much to the point that they treated him like a baby which is by the way unusual to a western family.
    As for the New Zealander they where nice and religious and a hard working family, they are not rich like the Australians but after I spent my time on both families I realized that choosing the New Zealander is the better choice, why? Because I know that no matter what happened he and I can survive on our own, while if I chose to be with the australian I don’t know what will happen if his parents are gone, there might be money but money will run out and what will happen when there is no money?
    I don’t want to be the one looking for money and feeding the family. So I chosed to be with the New Zealander, he may not have the money but he works hard enough and I work hard enough, we still don’t own a house but I’m happy and contented with my choice and above all else I feel loved.

    1. lol, All White men.

      For people out there doubting it…. just read this post, absolutely white loving filipina.

  144. Not all filipina have that mentality if they want foreigner man just for money or wealth. I been in relationship with a dutch guy who is younger 1 yr than me. I like and love him alot because of his prospect and goal in life to have a family. He is not from rich family during his school year he know how to save his money for food gave by her mom and dad, during his college years he work and study to support him self to finish study. He is very independent person. He accept and love me about my past im a single mom i work hard to support my own child. When he was sick the first visit in philippines he was happy that im there to take care him together with my child that he treat as his own child. We both love to work hard to support our own needs and someday we be together as a family. Thank kach

    1. But filipino men have aspirations of having a family and have prospects too.

      But they’re not white, so you ignore them

  145. Please- it’s a whole business. From fraudulent visas- to the network in the states that already has the “husbands” picked out. Dying wives in the process.. Hit me as soon as the dirt covers the grave. Introduced by that nice P woman at the grocery who knew the wife was sick and dying. Bang a new Phillipa bride to be in the house in under 2 months. Entire families destroyed. Millions sent by cash to the Phillipines thru run down “Bodegas”
    This is the reality- then 11 months later with a phony marriage done (as there is already a husband in the Phillipines) the old man is found dead. Phillipa bride scurries to get as much more cash as she can before getting back to the Phillipines- OUT of REACH of the law.
    Right tell us some more fairy tales. For what is written here is 99% of the reality.

    1. most of the time it’s philippine girls who aggressively pursue a relationship with a caucassian male even if the latter only wants to be friendly 😀

    2. agree. besides it’s girls from the philippines that actively pursue a relationship with caucassian men sometimes too aggressively even if the latter only wants to be friendly or just being nice 😀

    3. email me I will tell stories that you will never believe the Philippines is a beautifull country its the people that are gold diggers lies deceit and cruel ive had 28 years of it true not all are bad there is the one percent good yes one percent

  146. with all the rhetoric, anyone from a third world country must admit it’s better to be a citizen of a developed western country 🙂

  147. Thank you for a very well written honest post! I love it, and it’s so refreshing to know that there are filipinas out there who are independently striving hard to make the bacon rather than being a freeloader parasite to their white / foreign man. It is true however, that perhaps 98% of filipino women marry white/foreign guys older than them (and I’m talking about a huge age gap of 10-30 years) for the reasons you have pointed out in this post; the visas, the money, and the belief of saving them from their adversaries of poverty. In the middle east, most filipino women date white guys to uphold their social status and to satisfy their emotional need. These are the kind of women that repulsed me and makes me feel ashamed of having a filipino blood in me.

    My father is filipino, mum is european. I never looked like a filipino but I have lived in the ph for 5 years and hang out with my fili classmates as I took filming classes in DLSU. When I got promoted for a job in the middle east however, it’s sad to say that almost all filipinos working there are uneducated and very judgmental. Almost everybody has the typical failipino thinking of “white is always richer and better” I don’t blame them, It’s how they are raised in a country filled with close minded religious bigots.

    1. Anne jillian, with pinoy mentality kaakibat yan dating with foriegner… Make sure you are strong against those accusations… Im maried with a white guy, supalsupal sila pag may marinig ako, di pweding tatahimik lang. its time to educate them sometimes harsh way of educating them helps Hehe…
      At common issue is money, kya masakit tanggapin kung di matin gawain…
      At isa din na ipaglaban mo, pag my kasama kamg puti biglang tataas ang mga fee… Entrance fee, minsan sa iba Naka categorized na f foreigner mataan ang bayad nila… Sa pamasahi ang kritikal, ma tricycle or taxi, Jeep kung pakyawan at even gueat house tataas bigla pag malamang fireigner kasama mo… Advice, negotiate earlier para may idea ka din wag padadala sa explaination nila na bigla lang nag.increase.. Sa guesthouse, booked in advance wag sabihin na foreigner ang kasama mo… Base on my experience, hehe…

  148. Wow! Thanks for sharing your story, I really love it. But the comment… lol

    Now I am having doubts dating a foreigner.

  149. i enjoyed reading your comments here. funny, it enlightens me.credits to you ms.kach. im a sucker of online dating in hope to find love thar i cant do in reality due to my busy sched. i’ve signed up in fews online dating site, hence there isnt any progress. reason? well i dont know why. anyway, thanks again ms.kach and to you all beautiful earthlings

  150. Glad to see an article like this. Unfortunately I have seen alot of Filipina marrying old foreigners just for security and financial stability even at the expense of them Filipinas being abused, disrespected and treated like a “goffer”. They totally hurt my eyes. I have seen some of the comments and some of the complaints of the husbands are valid. I have seen the likes of them. Sometimes I feel so ashamed when I see Filipina women like them.

    But to say that 99% of Filipinas are like them isnt true. True to what other people in this thread have commented some families is not so much welcoming of the foreigners. Not all families in the Philippines would be happy to have their woman marrying a westener or a foreigner. This may sound new to most people but do your research, visit other unpopular places to get to know more of the Filipina women and its culture. You might be surprise how much Filipinas are educated and independent in the country. Or how much pride a decent Filipino family has that they would do everything so as not to bother their daughter & sons specially after they get married. You would be surprise with the normal Filipino wedding traditions that the family and relatives of the bride & groom ensures that the couple has everything and each side of the family is competing with gifts for the couple, among other rooted wedding & family traditions.
    Any decent man who has a decent purpose in marriage will find a suitable woman in the Phils if they would only expand their horizon instead of just settling down to the first woman that smiles to them. It will save them a whole lot of headache if they learn the traditions and culture first before commiting into a relationship. The Philippines have 7100 islands each island has their unique culture. Explore them don’t just stick with one or two islands that is popular for tourist. There is a reason why other island isnt, then you will know what a true blooded Filipina is like. And when you do, you will know because you won’t get their YES to a relationship as easily as the others because they are worth it and they dont have the skeletons that most of these poor guys here complained about!

    Goodluck people!

    P.s. i am a Filipina woman who is in a relationship to a a foreign man 19 yr senior than me.. There’s a huge cultural difference but finances and my relatives have never been part of our arguments and differences. Never asked for any financial help or support in all of our 4 yrs relationship. I always split the bill with him even though he always insists to pay for all (if he is Filipino man I will never hesitate for him to pay all, Filipino men knew their responsibilities as much as we woman do but since he is of different culture I take care not to be stereotyped) i chose him and loved him for his strong character, the only guy I knew “who could hold my reigns”. Thanks to the age difference he got the wisdom and strength to outwitt me 😉

    1. Hi , Alexsa. I am a spaniard man and my gf is a filipino ladyboy, she is 39. 62 mine.I discovered my real sexuality two years ago.I was looking for a filipino ladyboy, but just for a chance, i met a lot of filipinas in disposal to talk with me, many of them asked for money from the very first moment.Really. And some members family of my gf too, just little amounts, but when you just send a first time you can be involved in a problem , coz, probably that was not only the first time.I fought a lot and broke down many times with my gf because on that issue.Really, she told me she had changed her work, she was working in a really hard shift, from 6 am to 2 pm.And sure you know how the traffic jam is in Metro Manila.Ok.But her salary was less, from 300 to 200 e.She was tired of awaking to that strange hours, she told me she was really afraid walking alone at 5 am alone on the street. I never asked the name of the company she was leaving, but i know every company where she was working after knowing me.She told me that her new salary was not enough to live in her actual adress.So i said to her i will help you.And as a kind of agreement, i sent her that 200 e.But every time i went to internet and looking for information about filipino dating with foreigners i got into in trouble , suspecting about everything on her.A lot of discussions, a lot of crying, really, we are together as a miracle, after so much fighting, not only just about money, there was misunderstanding in silly things too, happily overpassed.She recognize that she has a strong character, and her family knows it. But she is at the same time really lovely and caring and really seductive. She is very intelligent, as most of filipinos are , i am flattering them just truth.Ok. everytime i told her seriously:” I will not send you more money”, she began to fight , leaving me.She cried, i cried.At the end , it was like she won, and her reason was that i had decided to help her from the beginning.Yes , i told she won, but wow, after really a lot of suffering from both of us.She acted like if she was really desperate.And she was filling a part of this kind of scenario coz she was really acting like a gold digger look like , even i told it to her, and she told me “i dont care, i am not so ,”.Everytime i was reading about profiles of goldiggers i could remember that she almost forced me in valentines to buy and send from my country a bunch of roses,….., finally i tried by internet, but was impossible,…., i buyed to her a new phone coz your phone was really damaged, so i could find many topics in her way golddiggers profiles look alike.We have talked about very thing in tha kind of issues and questions, you can find a lot of literature and people tellin their experiences in internet,, many of them really moved yourself .But ,anyway, she is not a scammer, of course, we met each other past year for 3 months.She is not a gold digger and if she was , she is not now( i knew her family in her province in Negros Occidental. I dont want to talk about that experience, we broke down there one time,just for a day ,as always.Ok . THere in the Philippines there is not possible to get married for us. And maybe, she could be ………..:I guess that a person can cheat you one time , even a person can cheat you sometimes.Ok, can someone cheat you all the time and everywhere?. Last time we discussed and fought was just because i was tired of suspecting on her,and finally, i told her, i will not, and she said ok.Really, the whole truth was that she had not job in that moment , she was without a job for two months, she is calling operator. could see her going to work everyday, but companies break and rise , so she have to change her company to job.Ok. In that moment , she had no job and she agreed. Suddenly, next day she called me and cried praying for a help, she had not almost food,and i knew she was ill from before that new agreement.I broke with her after looking at her crying,next day , precisely.I was angry and desperate, but most angry, and just for a chance we talked a again. And the “problem” is just i like her and she says she likes me, and when we can see each other by video conversation runs in just another different way , I guess. I is just my impression. And so, in this way, everything begun again.I am really shy of everything , coz i am a bit old for her . sometimes i am so happy to get a gf, and sometimes i think about myself.

  151. Im so sorry if other filipinas treated you like that.. But again please dont generalize it.. I am going out with a French-Moroccan guy and he is 5 years my junior.. I love him as he is.. When we go out he pays most of the time because he said he doesnt like women payin for his food but I buy him stuff as well like perfume, clothes etc.. Dont think that each Filipina is a gold-digger and im sorry to say this, if it is a recurring issue and you allow it then it is already your fault..

    I have told my bf a couple of times that I dont need his money since I am a career woman and we dont even know how much each other earns! Money is not an issue for us..

    So please, stop making assumptions that all Filipinas are like that.. I have Aunts and Uncles who are happily married to foreigners and most of them are in their 30-40 yrs together..

    Loving is a two-way street.. If you feel that the other person only loves you because of money then let go.. You are mature enough to know reality from fantasy..

    1. MAYBE NOT YOU…..

  152. My mother is a Filipina, and my father is a Dutchman. And their love story is so sweet. It was a love at first sight, they said. When my father met my mother (my mother was a traveller and my father was a backpacker in Australia). And yeah, that’s what happened. Of course, he had the permission of my grandparents! Sorry for my English.

  153. I have a really sad and heart breaking story of me and my online Filipina gf of 4 months 🙁 My heart is still breaking because it happened earlier this month 🙁 🙁

    1. So sorry to hear that it same as me to. I supposed to get married to American man but suddenly he said he didnt love me anymore. So really sad .

  154. Why does some people Believe that there are way more scammers and impostors in the Philippines in comparison to any other country ?

    1. Because it is a third world country and prostitution is the oldest profession in the world. My Fillipina GF of 3 years has just left me for a richer, younger man.

      1. ive been with a foriegner, a dutchman for 7 years, i love him so, but sad to say he choose his cousin more than me and my son..ive been a faithful and loyal woman to him but wasnt enough?i was so hurt now that we are not a priority. i have my own work, working so hard to prove to him that its not money that counts, to prove to him that not all filipina only needs/want money from their foreigner partner…

    2. It’s because it’s what they have experience. They are looking for wife here not in another country. So they judge the people and the place that they have been into not the places and people that they never even seen.

  155. hey im from Tanzania currently in college i would like to marry a pinay im planning on getting married when im 30 currently im 22 and im black do you think they would accept me ? i have two mutual friends on facebook from phillipines from what i see they are good people just like us Tanzanians i look foward meeting a beautiful pinay girl to marry and i want to settle in philipines if possible not Manila or Cebu but in Olangpo City .And what are dating sites to find phillipinas,sorry for the bad english.

    1. I’m African American and I’m currently seeing a filipina..She currently lives in Hong Kong. I’m 24 and she’s 27 years old. We have so much in common that we see past race. If you want to find a girlfriend, as long as you’re confident in your skin, you can find a girl of any race.

  156. when someone is looking to purchase a new home or condo first thing they do is… eg;) find the area they desire to live, then pricing, amenities/accommodations, structural integrity, mortgage, etc…. just to name a few! I mean this is going to be the biggest purchase you’ll ever make in your life…right?….you wanna be 110% sure your making the right move. Leaving no stones unturned, finding all the do’s & don’ts, & checking all your P’s & Q’s !!! Using this scenario as a analogy going into a relationship might & might not work depending on how good you really know your partner or you think you know them??? Doing some ground work like eg;) meeting there family,friends & neighbors are just to name a few pointers & might give you more insight as to who they really are. My parents use tell me as a kid … an ounce of precaution is worth more than a pound of cure…I’m a American from NYC US going out with a Pinay from Leyte for a 1- 1/2 yrs. now and visited a few time as well. She’s 33yrs.of age and I’m 53 yrs.of age and we truly fell in love at first site… I had the intro through a buddy of mine that married her cousin. We have our ups and downs like any other couple I’m sure but we always try to work it out. ..more cause of cultural differences. I’ll be retiring in 4 yrs. from my civil service profession and plan on snow birding out there for starters….and see where it goes from there! My famous modo is I’m like St. Thomas…I feel my way through….I’d like to thank the founders of this site & all it’s members/participants ….. God bless***

  157. It is allso asumed that dirty old white men come to Philippines to find younger wife because they cant find one in there own country witch is true of some but not all I accidently
    Started talking to a philapina and fell in love she is beautiful
    But she is 50
    Im 51 .
    We want to marry im in the UK
    So not all men want
    Young girls at 50
    I think she is amazing true

  158. It is soooo refreshing to encounter such an honest blog. I am a half pinay but I don’t look like it, though. I have never felt more like an outsider or called the n’word and other negative names than when I go the Philippines. It was so bad, I told myself I would never return. But I love my family so much. They are so loving and crazy. I have been touring the country every winter for four years now.
    It is interesting to hear how Philippines can be so “whitewashed” that they believe automatically “white is better.” For you you met and loved a guy who happens to be white..and not because he was white. I hope more Pinoys/Pinays value and take pride in their brown skin (stop bleaching) and not put others down that have even darker skin.
    Stay brown and beautiful. Make sure your husband stays covered. White people look terrible as a cooked lobsters HEHE.
    If you are ever in Korea…come look me up.

    1. Are you sure they were not calling you negrito instead of something else?

      Negrito is both a people and adjectve and does not quite have the racial undertones something similar in American would have.

      I do like how you play the victim card for someone supposdely insulting your skin color and then turn right around (predictably) and insult white people. Classy. Cognitive dissonance is strong with you.

      It is not just Filipinos. Thai, Vietnamese,Laos. Cambodian, Korean,Japanese and Chinese and even Indians all strive for “white” skin by staying out of the sun and gluthiasone (spelling) pills, soap and injections.

      As a white guy I find it weird but that is their body and life so eh. I say be proud of who you are no matter what but then I see white people trying to tan and turn brown so….yeah.

      1. @Mike. Older marriages often fail. Just as they do in the west. The reason, is that you have both lived your lives, and are set in your own ways. When you meet at a very young age, and intend to be with each other forever, you develop your own mythology, which only you two understand.
        For instance my lady’s beautiful Vay-Jay, soon became her “Bunny”. When she asked why? My answer was. “el coño sounds like coney in English, which is a variety of rabbit. Also it stood up logically, it was soft and furry, it was absolutely delicious, and it jumped about a lot.” So it went on, with many things. We developed our own love language, which only, we two, spoke. So her command, when I was busy eating her bunny, was often. “Dividir mi pequeña Bunny.”
        This why second, and successive marriages, fail in the west as well. You don’t ever learn each other’s language. My lady had her terms for my male-bits too. Which were often a mix of Espanola, Tagalog and English. My male part was called. “La barra de hierro Australiano.” Thus; Marriages with an extreme age difference are mostly doomed to failure, so too are third or fourth marriages. The country is immaterial.

        Meeooowwwwrr….Marum.(el gato con el pene de los Tigres)

        1. So let me connect the dots, so there is no ambiguity. I became too tired to type more last night. So lacking the “magic” of seeing you and your lover grow in your relationship, it becomes one of supply and demand.
          It happens in the West too. Some wealthy old bloke marries a young lady, or even someone nearer his own age. The marriage seldom lasts more than 5 years. Something happens to alter the dynamics of supply and demand, and the marriage ends.
          So too in the Filippines, the old guy gets himself a sexy beautiful lady, and deludes himself it is love. The young lady gets a mature man to look up to, who is much wealthier than her circle of friends. She may think it is love too. This may last many years, but eventually the balance shifts, the needs and wants alter, and the relationship ends. This is basic Keynesian Economics at work. THE MARKET FINDS ITS OWN LEVEL.

          I believe this “lack of magic” is the reason for so much divorce in the west. Couples are marring much later (older) Both of you have had many sexual partners There is no room for the growth of magic in your relationship.
          I had the pleasure, of seeing my lady grow from a girl to a woman, who knew how to be loved by, and to love a man. While she saw me grow into a man who learnt how to both love and entertain a woman. This is a “magical” experience, and during this time we developed our own language of love. Which both connected us, and separated us from others.

          Conclusion: Enjoy yourselves, but don’t let your male ego delude you. At 55+ years of age, you are no longer some great stud, fulfilling the fantasies of some young lady. Also, if it is your third or fourth marriage….Why do you expect this one to be any more lasting than the others? To believe differently, is merely the triumph of “Hope over Experience”.

          Purrr….Marum. (Isang pusa)

  159. I’m a Filipina and i have a westerner boyfriend but I earned more than him and we split the bills. 🙂 Sorry guys but those Filipina’s you’ve met doesn’t have a career! 😛

    1. It is not scammers I am worried about the ones that worry me are the fakers that claim to be your friend and then one day they just leave without a word. And then then you realize that every word they have told was a total lie

  160. I don’t like Filipino, they are arrogant, love to make constant noise, hideous smell, always drunk and stupid too, especially a self-pride about their country. Their genes isn’t a good genes among human races. They will ruin your genes.. Probably you will get an ugliest and stupidest son/daughter.

    1. You might be having a deep pain in your heart ..in behalf of all Pilipino, we sorry for anything that made you say all that words Mister, well goodluck in your life may God always blessed you. 🙂

    2. Seriously?why?what is your nationality?racist..!!get a life dickhead..you just happen to met a bad person then generalizing all..don’t you have bad persons in your country?shame on you..hahahahaha

  161. You just started dating him and you’re already using the word “committed” ?
    Go with the flow. Don’t push it.

  162. This is beautiful! I have started dating a foreigner here in Canada, he’s Irish. The only problem i have is that I feel like I’m not interesting enough for him, like what do you guys do for holidays? My family doesn’t really have any traditions we go by during holidays, birthdays that makes me feel uncomfortable and holding me back to be fully committed to him, i’m scared he’s just gonna get sick of me. any advice?

    1. You just started dating him and you’re already using the word “committed” ?
      Go with the flow. Don’t push it.

  163. I thank this website. Wish my wife would read it. I lived in the PI for 2 1/2 years. Call me stupid call me smart I am on my 3rd filipina wife. First of all it is a myth that they love their husband so ooo! much. I am a genuine honest good natured american. Very caring and generous. I am not without compassion and empathy. I am a filipina expert!!! There is nothing I dont know about them inside and out. They are a hotheaded jealous bunch. I look like a hollywood movie star and the girls act nuts and crazy around me. So I have that quality that works agaisnt me. Well I am not a playboy so dont treat me that way. But after they are married to me all they want is sex and to keep dumping money to her family in the P I. I am very humble and easy going but I am done putting up with the shit. Her family lives in a house and she built another in the PI and we live in a tralier in a park. OK so the bitch wants to keep giving money to her family well she dont get sex and now she cant sleep. She gets off everytime we have sex thats.because I am hot and the master when it comes to that. Guess what its time we had our own house and life. We have 2 beautiful girls and its time to give them what they need and slac off on your family. I have had enough.

    So you want to marry a filipina? Not worth the trouble. They dont follow god our worship Him our I would have a happy family!!!

    1. i read what you said and my experience with my wife and her family is that the foreigner is primarily a provider, an asset that the who​le filipina family has a right to benefit from financially. The article of the filipina lady above is misleading to say the least.. Her family is composed of 7 children and 3 brothers and 3 sisters. Their ages range from 20 to 30. They are all of working age. Only two of them work. The others just stay lazily at home doing nothing and expecting me to support them. I will not. I have agreed to pay for their electricity bill and water bills EVERY month and that’s it. Why ? Because I am living off my pension and have a filipina wife and her little boy to support. That is my limit. It has caused lots of fights between me and my wife. Her 20 year old sister just does not work. Lots of girls their age work in department stores etc. Not her. The other sister is only 24 but already has 4 children not of the same father…. so she feels she has a right not to work and be supported. ALL all all all our fights are about her family,because of her family. I WOULD BE INTERESTED IN HEARING FROM OTHER FOREIGN GUYS AND THEIR EXPERIENCES WITH THEIR FILIPINA WIVES.. Thank you.

      1. Greetings Frank,
        I am the Australian husband of a Filipina almost half my age. I am 71. she is 39. We met online four years ago and married within three months. She was then 35 and a virgin. Not Catholic. Educated with a degree in Architecture with a full time job in Manila. Three siblings. Two older one younger. One sister, two brothers. Her father lived overseas for most of her life to earn money to educate his children. He has since returned home where he continues to find employment in the construction industry. The family are all self supporting in a variety of industries but mainly construction. The extended family are close and in my experience not looking for any hand out from me as their only western member. That is not to say that occasionally we send financial assistance but through choice and generally at Christmas or other celebrations.
        My wife works as do I and we have an income from some long term property investments provided by me. We act as a married couple should in respect to money. Any surplus is saved in a joint account. We pay for everything using plastic and there is no restriction as to use other than our own individual frugality. Surviving financially in this country is not easy.
        I consider myself to be fortunate in my choice of companion and believe it’s the same for her but we have other Filipina married to Australian men whom I don’t consider fortunate. Family pressure for sustenance seems to be the main hurdle for the husbands to accept particularly where the income is limited to welfare/pensions. Whilst not always visible I also feel for the female who is married to a man with unfortunate habits and little respect. Some do, in fact, only want a slave and dominate the poor female.
        All in all I believe the ground rules regarding any expectations regarding provision of future, Filipino, family sustenance should be determined before any commitment is made. The Filipina needs to understand, before she ties the knot, that westerners are not all wealthy and that charity starts at home. If she is not prepared to accept this or later on abide by any agreement made at the outset then there is always going to be problems.
        I insisted on the execution of a pre-nuptial agreement witnessed by my fiancée’s mother to be sure there could be no misunderstanding. I would recommend this to anyone planning on wedding someone from a developing country.
        Good luck to all.

        1. Good advice there David. You guys have to be firm and set limits when it comes to supporting extended family members. My husband is an American. I never ask him to send money to my family ever! My family back home are mostly independent, have their own businesses, but there are times that they need help, so I loan the ones that are good in paying back. I don’t charge any interest unless it’s used for business purposes. Charity is different from business. I work my butt off to help my husband as well.

          If possible I don’t want to be dependent on anyone. That’s the reason I rarely ask for financial help even to my husband. There was a time when I got so desperate (before we got married), I lost my job when I was in pinas. Nobody would help me, not even my brothers and parents. My parents had no problem giving huge amounts of money to help my brothers but since I’m a female, I was treated differently. Would not even give P100 pesos when I reluctantly shy tried asking. I told my b/f about my situation, he lends me some money. Fast forward, I repaid him everything and so much more the moment I got a job. I never take advantage of anyone’s kindness.

          There are good and crazy pinas. It is really important to get to know the person and her family more before committing. And let them know beforehand what you want or your expectations.

          All the best to everyone! 🙂

        2. As soon as I read this Bola-bola I stopped reading… “We Filipinas can also travel to any country in the world with our Philippines passport so why would we need them if we can already get things on our own!?” Straight lie… The Philippines is considered a “mail-order” third-world country with a high propensity for immigrations fraud, thus they require visa for most countries and those visa are hard to get… Talaga? Oh-oh! Toto-oh! O-po!

          1. Simple answer many of your people have burned and scammed so many american men that the USA government consider you as TNT. Many pinay women once they become a USA citizen thats when all hell break loose, from false domestic abuse allegations to simply just leaving with all his savings. PRENUPTIAL IS THE BEST WAY TO GO. But its the bad filipinas thats making it hard for the good ones to enter good oh america, BLAME IT ON YOUR OWN PEOPLE.

      2. I think you married a trash here. Why come all the way here and find a rock to hit your head. I guess women in USA is more expensive so men keep getting the cheap women here. If you got a woman from wealthy family that wouldn’t be the case. But it’s impossible to get a good looking wealthy woman if you aren’t the same. So I guess it’s just the trash ones that are really available for foreign men most of the time. Very difficult to get the upper class.

      3. YOu know, i am a Filipina as well, but i am against and not in favor of what other co/ Filipina doing to their Foreign boyfriend or foreign husband…….. Sometimes there are Filipina who are fun of distroying the reputation of good Filipinas as well. There are Filipina chatting while their husbands beside them and sometime they hide their husband in the province, and there is a filipina got 4 kids and she declared only the two kids to her bf while the other two kids is hidding in the province with the father….aaand there is a Filipina chatting while her husband is on shore (seaman) ….she meet her bf in real out of her husbands consents … Why i know all these? because they are all my neighbor. Well i reckon, that there is always a BAD KARMA as there is a saying, do not do unto others if you do not want others do unto you. …..This saying is no exception men or women can suffer a Bad Karma if both is not Loyal and not honest in a relationship.

    2. The article above presents us with seven myths about filipinas marryin foreignersg. Well here is one that is fact and not myth. 99% of filipinas marry a foreigner primarily to have her family financially cared for.. Notice I said ‘primarily’. That in my book is being a scammer. My wife, who is a sweet loving person said to me once during an argument ” i married you so you would support my family” — to which I replied “I MARRIED YOU BECAUSE I LOVED YOU AND FOR NO OTHER REASON ! — I still totally refuse to finance them more than their electricity and water bills… EACH AND EVERY MONTH.

      1. You are being too generous , if I were you I would simply refuse to pay her family anything. Her attitude is disrespectful and you need to put a stop to it asap.

        1. You are absolutely right. I have put a stop to a lot of abuse already. This business of showing up announced and uninvited and immediately go for the fridge has stopped. The last instance was her brother and his wife coming to our house uninvited, unannounced, and he goes for the fridge and she plugs both their mobile phones and start charging them without even asking permission. They were out of the house within 3 minutes…. or when her brother came to our house with their telephone bill and said “FATHER ASKS YOU TO PAY OUR ELECTRICITY BILL.. HERE IT IS! — ha ha haha COMEDIANS… OR ON ANOTHER OCCASION It transpired in their house that my wife and I had just arrived from the supermarket and when we went out again to buy bread, they came to our house and consumed completely the 4 litres of ice cream we had bought and the biscuits… They were just there watching out TV and gulping our. 99% of our arguments fights are about her family and the abuse. So it annoys me when I read articles like the one above claiming that their particular relationship is a cream. . If not this, then somebody answer this… WHY IS THE MAJORITY OF FOREIGNER FILIPINA RELATIONSHIPS ABOUT AN OLDER, MUCH OLDER MAN AND A YOUNG FILIPINA ? What is the young filipina seeking when she married an older man ???? Somebody answer that. The answer is that the filipina hopes that being young will conquer the heart of an old fool. and financial gain with the deal. There are of course many filipina/foreigner relationships that are nice and lovin but 99% of filipinas seeking a foreigner are scammers.

          1. I’m sorry to hear that, wow. Your inlaws are too arrogant and disrespectful. If that is my family I am the one who will kick them out. My bf is 14 years older than me, he spoils me but just me not everyone from my family. My parents have money for themselves and my family is not my problem. My dad always says he will never bother us that is why he work hard and was very frugal with money. My brothers are not my problem too. So basically my bf will only take care of me not everyone, besides I can work too. Chinese culture is different, you borrow money and pay for it later, no asking but borrowing is allowed. So if you run business you need capital then you can borrow but make sure you pay for it. My dad doesn’t like asking like a beggar he has his own money. My relatives are all independent and will only borrow money and pay with interest. But asking without pay is not allowed for us. I can’t even ask money from my dad he will yell at me lols. I guess I deserve to be spoiled by my bf, I am cute and he loves me, and I love him back. When we get married I will also work so we can just share expenses and we can also save money for our small business someday. He plans to buy ranch when he retires, but I disagree because I want a small business so we can still earn while we are retired. I don’t like to be out of income when I retire, I told him we still need to earn when we are old because the older you get the more expenses comes, the hospital bills is the worse one. I’ve seen all bills of my grandma in St lukes, it cost millions for several years, and compared to others they couldn’t even afford the latest chemo, we paid the latest one the doctors collaborate with the doctors in USA, it’s all huge expenses and i saw some patient in the hospital who can’t afford everything and die miserably. We will all die but atleast money can make it a little pain free. So I told my fiance retirement is not enough to pay for all sorts of bills. So I want us to have our own business someday and so we wouldn’t be worried with medical bills and i want the best for both of us not a cheap hospital. A private room or VIP room in an expensive hospital is better. We will get old and weak and die someday, So the least that we can have is a decent way of dying and decent way of being six feet under. But my fiance is lucky atleast he doesn’t need to feed anyone from my family and we only have to take care of each other. Help is okay if some family member is in trouble then you can help but they need to pay for it. I mean they need to find a way to have income, they can borrow money for capital but not ask for free money. Some of my cousins married to white, it’s actually the other way around. My aunt don’t like her inlaws, her daughters always ask for money allowance monthly and all tuition fees for grandchildren. Their husband are not good with business so they remain employees. Even a 10t dollar monthly is not enough for all expenses. My aunt stil needs to send money for them. And my cousins earn more than their husbands too. I guess it just defends on what kind of family and race you get. We were thought never to ask, we need to earn it, borrowing is just for capital but you should always pay interest period. Independence is not just working, it’s also getting enough money for a good life and loyalty is important too. Husband is the boss and the king but the wife is the boss at home and the queen lols. Husband and wife should respect each other and take care of each other until their last dying breath that’s what marriage is all about. A friend, a lover, and a soulmate.

    3. Well, I’d have to disagree with you there. You must understand that not all Filipinas are like that; It depends where you find them.

  164. I understand that a filipina first loves thier family then their kids then their husband. God sais love god love husband love kids love self. Filipinas dont follow god. If they did there would be harmony. Therefore dont expect harmony from a filipina.

  165. I married a FILIPINA but totally refuse to financially support her young parents and 4 sisters and 3 brothers and their 7 kids. Her brothers and sisters range from 20 years of age to 29. They are not my problem. Her grandmother made the mistake of telling my wife 2 months ago “IITS ABPUT TIME YOU GET THAYT FOREIGNER OF YOURS TO SUPPPORT YOR FAMILY” — I WALkED to her house and and told her in very simple terms pracisely that. They are not my responsibility nor do I want to assume that responsibility. I advise all foreigners married to filipinas to do the same. Emotional blackmail does not work with me and it should not work with foreigners married to filipinas. Inthe first two weeks her family frequently entered our house unannounced attacked out frige. That happened some 10 times. I put a stop to it without hesitation.

    1. oh wow! what kind of trouble did you get yourself into? You are being taken advantage! Tell your wife that you’re going to leave if she and her family shows such disrespect. Try it. Or how about move far away from her family, or find someone else much nicer. Life is short, don’t spend your life with someone that mean. There are many nice ones you know. I’m a pinay bty.

  166. I have dated some filipinas before.

    There’s a reason why these stereotypes exist, they exist because it does apply on many filipinas..

  167. My name is Joe
    I’m a nice active caring giving guy ,
    I really like Asian girls – not too young – my kids are 22-24
    I’m Avery young 56 – played soccer up till a few years ago and badminton 3 times a week now.
    I have no luck here in America- one thing after another- been divorced 5 years.
    Want an active – happy caring girl,in my life – not sure about new baby so must be at least 40
    Is there a city or area that’s best for singles?
    Or a service to meet ?
    I have many dates here but so much trouble – the last wants new house baby and dowry money for her mom !!

    Please help!!


    1. Its also because we always seen, viewed western in movies and televission… Media brainwash filipinos the standard of beautify… Just dont mind those people, your not asking them for a food in your table anyway… Its not in the color, its with the smooth relationship you have with your partner and your kids…

    2. The best source is recommendation, you habe common friends knows its othee and at least you have an idea of the person your chatting with… The most common source is online dating, but it doest mean that your a constant chatter for a couple of weeks you already knows each other better… Looking a future partner online is like shopping online too, you need to study harder the specifications of the product…
      If you dont want a baby anymore, look for age above 40s, if you dont want to support the family look for independent woman
      Lay your do’s and dont’s, and lessen to her do’s and dont’s too… If both accepts it, then thats a good start…
      Im a filipina too, and I agree with your last sentence above, but not in general of Filipinas…. Opportunistic or unopportunistic doest describes by skin colors…
      If you dont want a baby anymore, look for above 40s or with kids already… If you dont want to support the family look for independent lady… If you dint want to give dowey, look for a city girl most (not all) of native filipinos practiced dowry…
      I married a white guy also, me and my siblings are professionals my parents are retired… I spend my own money for our communication because I know that whites culture are independent, you earn you spend kind of thing… I share my own hard earned money to my parents…
      I hope this helps you…
      If you have more questions feel free to email me… [email protected]

    3. Intention is everything. check for the ff:
      – does the girl have a high paying stable job? high paying jobs are plenty in the PH. Rule out bar girls, store clerks, baristas and other blue collar jobs
      – does she speak good English? English is taught in schools in PH since kindergarten. Any Filipina who does not speak good English may not be well-educated, hence she maybe looking for a get-rich-quick route, i.e., marriage to a white guy
      – is her family self-sufficient? do they all have jobs? if not, her family might see you as a milking cow
      – does she live in the ghetto? there are good neighborhoods and bad neighborhoods in the PH. Ghetto folks are generally not so good for marriage.
      – does she come from a good college? Is she even college-educated? Education is a priority here.

      I’m a landlady and as they as they say in the rental business, screening the tenant eliminates 90% of a landlady’s problem. Same with relationships. Just don’t get drowned with all the female attention coming your way. The scammers will go for you hard and fast! You will feel like a sex rockstar here. Its part of the scammer’s ploy. Be prepared for that and don’t get sucked in. Take your time and look at other options.

      TL;DR – check for education, career, family background, neighborhood, family ties/attitudes, English skill. and don’t buy your own hype.

    4. Hey! Mr. Joe I have my older sister shes not been married, she’s 30 years old but she had a child sad to say the man got away after he know that she is pregnant he’s an army.. I wish that she could find a better man that who can accept him and cares him for the rest of her life. She’s very good and family oriented. Just to confirm I’m not dealing with my older sister her ok!, but if it’s ok! why not.

      Good Luck Mr. Joe 🙂

  168. Hi Ms. Kach..been following you and Jon for almost over a year now..uhm…….would it be alright if I repost this article in my blog zaryasonata.wordpress.com properly crediting you and this site i’ll put in a straight link so people can find the original post.. but I’ll understand if it cannot be posted outside this blog..thank you 🙂

    1. Please Mae, feel free but is it possible not to copy the whole content and just the parts of it then redirect them to our page? Just avoid duplication, Mae! Thank you! =)

  169. You are with a white man because you have a racial inferiority complex. You Worship whiteness as a standard of beauty and hate your filipino features. You would never be with a dark skinned expat.

  170. Can I talk to you guys on my facebook sometime? I married a filipino and I’m curious if they are doing the same things as she does in a marriage. Get back to me please. Christmas is down this year :'( thanx-phoenixjayson on fb

  171. You are a lovely couple!! 🙂 and those who took their time to share their wonderful stories here, i’m very happy for you guys.

    I feel very fortunate to have come across this article; since recently I’ve been searching through articles and blogs to give me an idea what I’m getting myself into with possibly dating a foreign guy.
    I’m 24y/o and currently studying again. After a graduating in 2011 and passing my board exam for nursing; the next year, I started studying what I really love which is Fashion Design. I feel blessed that my parents understood me and still supported me about it, so I’m working really hard to really build myself in this career. i have been really busy and ever since my 1st bf (that was 3 yrs ago), I haven’t really had a chance to meet new people; plus my surrounding wasnt exactly suitable to meet guys (let’s face it, fashion school means girls and gays. haha no straight guys)..

    So my bestfriends (backstory: one of my bestfriends met her current bf of 2 yrs in this speeddating event that was organized by one of her very close friends. She is now in Canada and her bf is planning to follow him and settle down so they can get married soon. :), wanted me to try speed dating. Just for fun and if everything goes well, possibly meet someone. But I always say no and since im really busy, I couldn’t find the time.

    Then few months ago my bestfriend tagged me on the speeddating event again. They were really insistent and they wanted to treat me just so I would try. So I ended up saying yes, not really expecting anything. And then, I me this Finnish guy. I already saw him across the crowd and i thought to myself, “why would someone like him be here?” and i’m really not into foreign guys except possibly koreans or japanese, so i thought “i don’t have to say yes to him,”.. and then when we talked during the event, he really made a good impression on me. 🙂

    Unexpectedly, I said “yes” to him and we found out that we said “yes” to each other.
    Eversince the event we’ve been talking and he was always asking me when can we meet but, due to my busy sched I couldn’t immediately say yes. But next week, we might finally have our coffee date. 🙂 I really want to see him and talk to him since we only have 3mins to talk on the event, but im also hesitant because of how we see pinays with foreign guys. I don’t want other people to get the wrong idea of seeing me with me. Besides that fact that he is a foreigner, I think he is also in his early 30s. I talked to my bestfriends about it and they said it shouldn’t matter because I’m not a gold-digger or prostitute, I’m a well- educated and well-mannered Filipina so why should i feel bothered. But I still feel a little worried though.

    When I read your article, i felt kind of reassured that I’m not alone and there are a lot of happy and successful pinay-foreigner relationships out there. I’m not saying that we will end up together, but atleast I don’t feel so worried anymore about seeing being with him (and I know that is unfair for him to think that way). I think i will still have this worry at the back of my mind but i hope ill be able to conquer so that i could really find the time to get to know him.

    Thank you again for this article! 🙂

    1. Hi Kach Medina,

      Thanks for that post, well thought of. Could you please help me answer this question. Im married to a black guy and we have 3 beautiful children, people here in the Philippines constantly ask me why a married a black guy and not a white guy? why are so many Filipinos obsessed with going out with a white guy?


      1. Rebecca, it’s just the mentality in our country because of American colonialism.. never mind them, the most important thing is you love your partner!

      2. Because they want white skinned children. People here in Philippines all want beautiful white skin, and skin is very important in Asia. You can see so many lotions and soaps and whitening pills. Having a smooth white skin is important. It is fresh looking and it looks beautiful on most people. Plus having pointed nose is better. People are so concerned with how their children will look like. We have to admit beauty is the first thing we see before the personality. Skin and facial features is very important and the height and weight too. We want to good looking children, and if you can have it why would you settle for something less. I guess it defends on what you can have. When the child grows up the appearance is important and the education, you apply for a job you need to look good and to be smart. The world is a very competitive place to live in, we want our children to be able to survive fair enough, we don’t want discrimination and judgement for our children. You cannot deny that Philippines is obsess with beauty and it’s easy to fall in love with beauty, especially if the beauty is inside and out. you cannot blame that people just want the best, if not the second best or else maybe some will end up with the last on the line.

        1. Yes, this is a very ‘fair’ comment. I have been shopping where ALL the skin creams are whitening. Myself, I repeat something my black Franco/American g/f in London once said to me. “The darker the skin the sweeter the meat.” That may sound gross but I have dated, married and lived with dark skinned women ever since. Sorry to say I am single once again. . . . but I think I need a woman with even darker skin. If you know any surgeons they will be able to tell you quite reliably that we are all the same colour on the inside. So . . . . its a visual thing I guess. . . and its only skin deep.

    2. i dated one american before also, he was also in his early 30s. i wanted to meet him, but i was very hesitant cos i felt embarassed specially about the what people would usually say if they see me with him. he was a nice man so i tried to meet him secretly. whenever we were together i would hesitate walking beside him, i never held his hand in public,i was always conscious whenever we were in a restaurant. he was a good looking american, very fit, i liked him and i would feel bad that i would be embarassed. until after a month of consistently seeing him, someone saw us and my family knew about it, and i had no choice but to introduce him to them. which i regretted most cos we broke up after 6 months cos he chose travelling over me. all throughout our relationship he never understood the fight i kept fighting against society, against my family, and against myself. if you are strong enough, you go for it, but if you are not sure yet about it, dont introduce him to anyone. just my advice.

  172. I am a Filipina with a Belgian guy. We’re together for almost 11 yrs now. Though he helped me enter Europe and shoulder some of the expenses, after finding my own job I paid him back even more than what I owed him. I have my own stable job earning almost the same as him. I handle my own earnings & I give my share of expenses. I help my family NOT him. During vacation it is a 50/50 share. I even pay my own ticket to Philippines back & fort. I am building my own house without his help that is why it is taking that long to finish it off. It does annoy me when Filipino people tell me I am lucky having a white guy in my life. He is lucky he have me.

    1. I wish I would have met someone like you.

      My Filipina wife is “nice” but sucking me dry. Her and her family. Only reason I stick around if for our son. As soon as he is old enough to come live with me full time it is bye-bye freeloaders and a divorce.

      Biggest mistake of my life. My son is awesome though and is the only good thing to come from it.

  173. Spot on! I totally agree with everything you wrote! I just recalled some memories from the past. Its really sad and dissapointing how other fellow filipinos reacts when they know someone is dating a foreigner or seen with a foreigner. They think you become rich and lucky for having a “white man” grrr still annoys me when i hear those words and worst even my relatives expects so much some relatives you were not close before acts to be your best friend.. Sad but so true.. The problem is they judge to quickly without asking and they assume so fast thinking they know everything.. Typical filipinos.. Well based on my experience.. One time we were walking from NAIA terminal 3 going out to save money from taking airport taxi so we decided to walk to take taxi outside the airport and we passed a security personnel who shouted ” ang swerte nyo nakabingwit kayo ng puti” good for him i was abit far from him, tired from the travel and prayed for patience from God towards people with small minds if not i would have punched him so hard. Its very disrespectful not just to me but to him.Seriously! Its really offensive to hear that and its not funny either.. We had a vacation in boracay for a week and the expenses were paid by both of us. He has work and i have also thats the reason why we work to save and spend. Respect is what everybody needs and most of all lets mind our own lives..??

    1. I am a filipina and i am living with a foreigner for a little over 4 years now…we met through a dating site..and i must confess i have been called out with different names…..gold digger is one of them…i dont blame them for he is 40 years older than i am….but just like what they said,age doesnt matter..and what other people think about us and our relationship is totally out of our business.what we feel is what we feel..i came from a poor family…i finished high school and became a nanny…i never imagined my life will change forever 6 years later…when we met i kind of knew i liked him before meeting him in person(for the record i arrived exactly on time).And the moment we saw each other eye to eye i knew he is the one…he was 61 and i was 21 at that time…some people told me to marry or to date a man your age..but in my case it doesnt even matter…we knew what we felt for each other wasnt love..but we respect each other and we liked each others personality.. and then he asked me (not even a month after we met ) if i could live with him…and if i wanted to finish school and i said yes!..for the first 6 months of being together was the hardest for me..well of course the age gap was one of the reason..but later on he and i talked about our indeferences and we accept it for the sake of us…we wanted to make the relationship work..he is not rich but he loves me very much and i feel the same to him…now 4 years later we are going stronger than ever..we are head over hills in love with each other..for me he is the blessing from God.Now i am a graduating college student..taking up criminology…yes im living a good life now but it was never my intention to date a foreigner just for that though some filipinas think otherwise but not all so people should stop generalizing….it is so wrong for some people to think that filipinas just wanted to be with a foreigner for the sake of good life..it just happens that you dont know who you are destined to be with the rest of your life..

  174. Nice to see a lot of feedback and comments on this article, but sadly not all filipina-foreigh relationships are fairytale endings. One part of the article mentions about filipinas depending on men for money. Ha, snorted out loud from that part because of my experience. I did a year long post grad internship at a luxury hotel in US. I was dating a guy who works as a chef in one of the restaurants we always go to. long story short, i was paying for all of our dates, he moved in with me for a couple of months and not even sharing one penny for the rent and utilities and groceries and to top it all, he owes me money too. I don’t know if i was just too nice *because i was just trying to help him out* or just young and stupid. And if i was like the stereotypical filipina most people would think of if they found out about this, i would’ve said yes when he proposed. Instant green card right? Yes, he did ask me to marry him right before i left. maybe i’m just too traditional or a hopeless romantic but i actually want my first marriage to be my only one. And i’m not ready to settle down. I’m too young for that.

  175. Hi,

    I enjoyed reading your article, it’s a good thing that stereotypical scenarios are discussed, I agree with you and majority of the people who are independent and who love their foreign partners without conditions. I’m filipina and also married to a white guy he’s Czech, I met him when I was still working as event planner in Kuwait and he’s still a student that time, we are 4yrs in relationship, and we just gotten married last year after he graduated in college, then lands a job and bought a place for us in Prague, the funny part was the surprise reactions I get from people whenever they learned that our age difference is just 1 yr. When I had my visa interview they told me that our situation is very unusual it’s because they’re used to 10-30yrs relationship gap between foreigners marrying a Filipina. So to independent filipinas out there who took the risk of falling in love to a foreign man Im proud of you for braving the relationship. May we all live happily in our own fairytale.

  176. I agree with you. I met my fiance here in cebu. He was for vacation in manila and decided to visit me here. I am a fil-chi, a BSN graduate and also an MBA postgraduate. I have work in an international school here in cebu, and also being a banker and a customer service associate in a british company. Yup! Before we met, i have a good education and work already. I dont love him because of his money, or his visa or anything. I love him the way he is, the way we love to be in each others arms. And yeah we will get married soon.

  177. I love this article! straight to the point and it is exactly what I want to tell everyone, not only filipinos but foreigners alike! I am an IT professional back in the Philippines, and moved here in the US to marry the man I love. I dated him because he is the only person who could carry on with my weirdness, and could understand the true meaning of independence. I also love travelling and my husband loves it too! The first questions and comments of some people back in the Philippines when they found out I am married with a white man was, ‘kaya pala lagi kang asa labas ng pinas dahil sa puti eh!’ I’m like, hey I work too.. he works. kanya kanyang bayad din po kami. And yes, I also work as an IT professional here in the US too, because I have received comments like, ‘wow ang swerte naman, ang sarap na ng buhay mo dyan hindi ka na mamomroblema sa pera dahil kay puti!’. LOL! I guess it’s not only dating white men, but some people tend to stereotype the Filipina woman alone, which should be submissive to the man, and if she is also dating a Filipino man, people will always comment Filipinas are dependent to a man.

    1. We’re on the same boat. Im working as a nurse sa pinas and a white guy introduced to me… Bago ako umalis sa pinas, ang sabi pa libre ka naman mayaman kana eh… Sinabihan ko di porke puti mayaman na, kung ganyan pag.iisip mo di ka aasinso… Sinupalpal ko cuz I cant stand such kind of mentality… Naulit pa, buti ka Jan richy nah, Sinabihan ko “ma pinas ka or sa ibang bansa, kung magkano ang kita mo Ganun din ang gastusin mo.. Nasa tao na yan kung marunong o dimarunong mag.ipon at mag budget”
      Si sad mentality Pero tutuo may Ganun…

  178. I love this article! It gave justice to Filipinas who is loving, falling in love with and have loved foreign men.

    When I met my ex boyfriend, an Australian Navy aged 26, I was already a junior law student (23). We fell in loved . The relationship lasted for 4 years. He met my parents, we were supposed to get married but the problem was his job in the navy and my unwillingness to renounce my Philippine citizenship and would stay in Australia.

    Hahahah! Life’s and love’s choices.

  179. Good one! I’m going steady with a Turkish guy. What you’ve posted on here are typical stigmas for Filipinas dating foreigners. But my case is slightly atypical so I can just almost relate to it. When I started dating my partner, it’s just plain boy meets girl–nothing else. But when I introduced him to everyone who needed to be informed that I’m dating a foreigner, and to top it, a Muslim–therefore, not your usual European/US white guy, it’s a different level of stereotypes! I’ve heard everything: “What will happen if you get married? Are you going to Convert?” “Don’t convert!” “Your children have to be Catholic.” “Is he an extremist?” “Sunni/Shia? Don’t continue if he is not sunni!” “How good is his English?” “Is he rich?” “Do they live in the desert?” “I bet he thinks you are exotic!” “Can he send us a gifts?” blahblahblah. Usually, whatever they assume my partner or this relationship is like is incorrect. I would often want to preach that it’s a lot simpler, more romantic and a lot less opportunistic.

  180. i really love what is written here, why? because i am also one of those pinay like you who proud to stand up on her on, and at the same time fell in love with a great loving foreign,
    (which is by the way my husband now ^^)

    my husband knew from the start i am an independent woman since i was young,
    and he admire this so much since his past relationships with other pinay before were unfortunately

    also i can relate to the visa thing, i was very clear with him that i dont need his visa, and i cannot count how many times i explain this to other people especially when the time i was processing my documents for marriage,
    i only want where my husband is, even it means middle earth LOL.
    i was also proud of myself that i was able to share some travel expenses and wedding expenses with my husband, which is actually seems shocking for my family and friends who heard this,
    but i dont care, they may think differently but to me, this should be the case,
    this will also help me in the long run to survive in this world. im independent woman after all ^^

    i hope this blog of yours be read by more people so other pinoy will know also that not all woman are always after for foreigners money or anything.
    but whatever the reason other pinay have for marrying or getting in a relationship with foreigners i respect them 100% for they have all the right to do what they wish to do, only i hope, people will not generalize things just because Maria did and blame it also to Juana ^^

  181. Hi Ate Kach,

    I have been a fan of your blog ?. I can relate on you, since I travel south east Asia last year I met a lot of foreigners. I would say that even foreigners think of that too on filipinas. But the foreigners that I met on my travel they knew my family had money and give it to me when I travel. But I met this Danish guy on the hostel that I’m staying at SG. Actually on that hostel they calling me serial dater because I go out mostly with boys at SG. Lol. On all the people that I met on that travel I date this Danish guy since he loves PH. So he became close to me and our group of foreigner friends teasing us together so we ended up dating. But unfortunately I need to go back to PH, but we still talking at Facebook, Skype and whatsapp. But after 3 weeks he follow me to PH he stay for 10 days, so I wanted to introduce him to my friends but they thought I’m just using him to get money. But when he stay at PH we eat at resto we share paying for our food. Then I move unfortunately we broke up because I move here in Dubai and he go back to Denmark. So LDR didn’t work for us because he meeting a lot of people on his travel. Then now I am dating a French guy here at Dubai, so my friends here they thought I’m using him too. But I prove them wrong I have good work and good salary. But when we are going out together people looking at us, mostly Filipinos. Sometimes it bothers me being really judge even him. Because he is white they thought when we are at mall he while buy something for me but no. Even on my birthday he wants to buy something for me and a expensive thing that I really wanted but I insist that I can buy that. He just paying for our food on the restore that we went to since he was so happy seeing me eat at the food that I crave a lot. Lol so in return I’m buying this that he needed at his apartment. People so judgmental about it mostly Filipinos. Since we are exploring new things about both of us, but we are so happy being together right now. I hope ou love story would end up like yours in the future 🙂

  182. First of all, congratulations on the engagement! I wish you both the best. Second, the article is great and very inspiring. I am seeing a caucasian man who I met through work and it’s been great. Some of my friends always tease me that well, this is to get into a country with a better economy, pretty children, better passport, etc. and I just laugh along with them. But the truth is it does hurt a bit when they say that because I’m just really enjoying this man’s company and he does seem to feel the same. We are both happy and that should be enough.

  183. One thing I have noted including the writer of this blog is that 99% of phillipino women, irrespective of their socio economic and educational background, have very slavish attitude towards ‘white skin’. Make no mistakes about it. If you observe a little bit close, the writer mentions about her preferred partner’s ‘genes’ which are ‘white’ and that’s almost every philippino women’s choice by default. The thinking is If you have white skin you are automatically good in everything and that I guess is because of centuries of colonization of their country by european countries with white population plus the general environment in Philippines where the people are surrounded by media projecting anything ‘white’ as good/better/superior. Those skin whitening cosmetic ads are a small example.

    If you’re skinned guy, you have very high chance of success with philippino women. I say this by practical experience where a very handsome looking, highly qualified and successful guy was repeatedly rejected by educated phillipino women because of his brown skin whereas the same jumped to date very average white skinned men. This trend I’ve observed more than enough with ppino women of all classes. So,If you’re a white fellow, it’s pretty easy. And some educated ppino women write blogs like these to justify their choice and feel good about themselves.

    This is my personal observation of ppino women for about a decade.

    1. Also, If you observe the photos of phillipino women on this page, they are ALL with white men. That should give you a clue on how their brains function. This is quite unique to phillipines and east and south east asian countries like Thailand, Vietnam, China etc. There are many other equally poor if not more poor countries in the world but you wont find this attitude of ‘White Worship’ with women in those countries.

    2. In addition to your comment, I also think it’s worthy of note that there are a lot of half white /half FILIPINA people that are celebrities in the Philippines and I believe is an upward trend. That bolsters the idea that if you marry a white man your children could be a famous actor/singer/athlete /beauty pageant winner. The sad fact is that idea is passed down from generation to generation as well.

    3. You’re funny, the whitening lotions and soap did not make people want to be white. They are there because people demand for it. White flawless skin looks better and you cannot deny that. Who wants a dark skinned full of acne or blemishes? You cannot blame people for wanting to have white flawless skin. It’s very important. Face is very important because you show it to the world. You cannot possibly talk to someone and hide your face. And not all white will be wanted by the way, because some are fat, or ugly too. Skin is just one most important thing, second is the facial features and then the height and shape of body. And then we proceed with the income lols. We first judge a person by looks because we are not blind. We want the best, but if we cannot have the best then we get the second best, if still not possible we settle for the third , and so on and so fourth. So it also defends on the woman if she is equal to what she wants. But most women here in Philippines the ordinary ones will just settle for the old white, because they can’;t find a young white husband, most young white are still childish and irresponsible. The women think that even if the white guy is old he still gonna give them beautiful children. And some women are also after the good life. But well you cannot blame women for that, Like they said they are just using their head. But I do feel sad for the men though. If the skin is a problem to you then why don’t you try to lighten it up. Do something about your skin, if not try to find a filipina who don’t care much about skin. I’m sure there are many. You cannot possibly say all filipina will not want dark skin, why is there so many filipina married to filipino? with dark skin, and why is there filipina married to black men? there’s so many women so why do you want women that don’;t want you? i’m sure there will be women that are okay with dark skin just keep looking.

  184. Don’t date foreigners who act very feminine! Let my story be a warning to all who read this.

    So I met a nice guy from UK who was serious at first then funny but he was very strange in his speaking and mannerisms like he was acting overly-emotional and would say things on skype video like “Oh my God where did you get those earrings?? They are so ADORABLE I bet you get sexy looks from all the men when you go out looking so fine!” but he said it in a highly feminized voice like he was trying to be sassy.

    Then he started saying how he loves me for me but that he find himself once he gets here. So I meet him at airport and he is wearing green shirt and PURPLE pants and a PINK TIE with his blonde hair spiked up with purple highlights! The jeans were extra tight and he had green ear muffs and was wearing leather boots with high heels!

    He has never dressed this way before but I knew it was him! I wanted to turn away but I knew if I left him alone he will find a bakla and won’t spend any time with me on the trip and I was right!!! I tried to calm him down but he kept getting people’s attention because of how he was dressed and he was walking like a runway model at a fashion show it was so embarrassing!

    At this point I knew the guy was crazy and that he didn’t love me. We spend the first 2 days together and on the third day he just said he will go to a meeting for his business partner’s legal representative to take care of some boring paperwork but I saw his instagram and he went to the most unusual party I have ever seen in my life. He was taking pictures with a bunch of different people and they were laughing and having a good time then I get a text from him telling me he has to stay another night.

    Then I don’t hear from him all week and I just call him to see if he’s okay and that’s when I learned he really just came here to party and that he has a wild side that only can be satisfied on a sailboat cruising from port to port along the philippine coast while high on meth. I was so shocked and his behavior was so crazy. Please just know that some foreigners are like that and don’t waste your time on guys like him. They act serious but then they come to the Philippines and think that they can act however they want is just so sad and heartbreaking because the guy seemed so perfect and just what I wanted.

    Foreigners come in all types so be careful what the guys can do when they come here and don’t be surprised if they change suddenly when you meet them for the first time!

    1. Sorry to hear of your experience but I can assure you all foreigners are not like that.
      There are the occasional good ones too. I saw my girlfriend from the Philippines across a crowded room in Dubai and fell in love with her immediately. In that moment I said to myself “if i dont speak to this lady I will regret it for the rest of my life”. For me this was an amazing way to react. I approached her and now we are to be married. In all races there are good and bad. I adore my girlfriend and I know I will for as long as I live. Her happiness will be my happiness. We will have a family and I will look after her. So dont give up or become negative because of one bad experience. There is luck involved in meeting people. In this instance you have been unlucky but you only have to be lucky once. I have been and now everything is sorted. Best of luck and dont give up.

    2. lols I remember a classmate before, he is weird. He is actually gay and he pretended to be a man and wanted to court me. He was just acting like a man because he wants money from me. He thinks it’s best for him to be a man since he is financially problematic. He started hanging out with me and acted weird lols. But actually he is not even good looking to begin with so it adds to the weirdness. Some gay will also want a girl for money so it’s not really new to me. He thinks I am okay since I look good and I have money so he needs to make himself manly ha ha.

  185. I dated an Australian man because I have the same thinking that they are straight forward and when they like you, they really do. I was wrong with this one. I kept my eyes open and discovered that there are many other filipinas that he simultaneously flirt/romanticize online on Facebook, chat apps, Instagram, Skype and I don’t know what else. It was devastating that this Australian man is a department store manager in Sydney and seemed to be decent, but completely not! He string along a lot of filipinas at the same time and I feel that he is taking advantage of filipinas. #AJH